Have you ever asked out your co-worker?

Yes, we worked at the same place, different departments. We were co-workers for a year, dated for a year and then got married. We have been married for 31 years.

I mentioned above that I met my wife at work. We actually met at her interview. I wasn’t her boss. She was going to be a peer and so all the peers interviewed her, including me. I had no romantic interest at that time, and neither did she.

We worked together for three years in the small group of 6 engineers. Our desks were about 20 feet apart. After three years I started to get attracted to her. I had previously been going through a divorce and, with three young kids, did not want to complicate our lives by adding a girlfriend. I didn’t date for quite some time. I asked her out, and we dated for three years, all while working together in the same company, and in the same small group. We were both mature enough and it worked. We both got promoted into management as the group grew to about 15 people, and we continued working in the same group. We conducted ourselves very well, and there was no discomfort from anyone in the group. None was reported to the head of the group (our boss), and none was perceived by either of us.

After three years of dating we got married. Next year we’ll celebrate 20 years.

It can work, and many people above have also shared.

After graduating from college with no idea what I wanted to do next, I worked as a paralegal for a few years. There were a few female colleagues that I became friends with, and a couple of them where I thought the possibility of something more was worth considering. I asked each of them out, they politely declined, we continued being friends.

I met my wife in grad school several years later. She was in the last year of her master’s program, and I was beginning work on my doctorate. While grad students in the same department aren’t technically co-workers, the same dynamic holds: there are a few dozen of you who see a lot of each other, and will continue to do so throughout the academic year, at least. But we became an item about midway through the fall semester, and coming up on 33 years later, we’re still together.