I am curious. Why did it end? How long did you end up apart? How did it resolve that you came back together? And then how did it work out in comparision to before?
It has not happened to me, but with one particular person I keep wondering if it could work out with somewhat different life circumstances (mostly long distance issues).
No, I haven’t, but random sidenote: for some reason, I read the thread title as “relationship résumé.” I sat there picturing a first date in which you’re asked for a detailed list of past relationships, with explanations of why they ended and a sheet of references . . .
You laugh. That’s coming. Folks (especially female folks) will want to read each other’s complete facebook history before agreeing to a first date.
I dated a guy for 8 months at about 2 years after my husband died. He was just recently divorced. Although we liked each other quite a bit, the relationship never really caught fire. We both thought maybe it was just a bit too soon and called it off. We stayed friendly acquaintances, had lunch every couple months, and about 2 years later we decided to give it another go. It worked much better the second time. No, we’re not still dating, but only because he accepted a job out of the country and I made the decision not to go. So no, not the perfect relationship either time, but I think I can speak for both of us that we’re glad we gave it a second chance.
My late husband’s cousin and her husband got divorced. Then they remarried. Then they got divorced again, and this time it took.
I sort-of fit the OP’s situation. I met a gal when we were both stationed at the same place in the Air Force. We were casual BF/GF for almost all of our 2 overlapping years there, then the AF sent us in different directions at different times.
We stayed in loose touch, but not really trying to keep the relationship alive. More like old friends. We each were doing our own thing with other people by then.
A couple years later by happenstance we ended up living just a few hundred miles apart. We each still had our own things going on, but ended up getting together for a couple 3-day weekends at each of her or my place. Did that for a couple years then realized this was silly; we liked each other a lot more than anyone else either of us had ever found. And we were getting old enough that the pickin’s were gettin’ kinda slim elsewhere.
Next month we’ll have been married 27 years. Looking back on how good those years have been and continue to be, it’s chilling how close we came to passing all this up.
So did I. But I was thinking those exit interviews must get brutal.
I met and started dating my fiance when I was 19. We got engaged when I was 21. When I was 26 I started having much worse problems with depression than was normal for me and by the time I was 27 I was suffering from sleep deprivation (partly from depression and partly due to his severe and untreated sleep apnea) and hated every aspect of my life. I left and moved to New York to live with my sister.
I was gone for 2 years and we both dated other people. At one point I was in a car accident which caused me to be put on citalopram for panic attacks. It had the unintended effect of completely reversing my depression with absolutely no side effects.
He remained my friend and strong supporter the whole time I was gone. When I lost my job due to a work related injury, he offered me the spare bedroom in my old home in exchange for house keeping, cooking, and company. After I moved back and it became clear that we both still loved each other, he finally agreed to go for a sleep study.
It has been 6 years since I came back and 5 since he got his CPAP. We both agree that his CPAP and my citalopram are the reasons we both are so happy and well-adjusted these days. He has continued to be supportive of every aspect of my life. I am now 35 and he is 42. I’m almost done with my degree in Respiratory Care (which I started because of my interest in disordered sleep, thanks to him) and his job may very well be taking a very exciting turn next month (assuming it ever stops snowing long enough for him to have his damn second interview). We have 3 happy and mostly well-adjusted dogs and a beautiful house. I can’t imagine not having him in my life. No other man compares to him. I am very lucky.
Started dating SO at 17 in college. Broke up when I graduated at 20 cause he wanted to get married right away and I did not. Move completely across the country, NY-Ca. Wrecked my car, called him in the middle of the night, he flew out to CA two days later. Going on 39 years married this summer. Life is great:)
It ended because it was my first relationship and frankly, I wasn’t mature enough for it.
We were apart for about 6 months although we had daily contact during that time (co workers and still hung out on occasion).
We got back together because I decided to take it much more seriously. 6 months of being single showed me that I enjoyed being in the relationship a lot more than being out of it. (It probably didn’t hurt that she dated a huge loser in the interim, for her part.)
We ended up dating for another 3 years, then getting married and we’re going on 8 years of marriage now. Things are fantastic. 