Have you ever heard of CONTRACEPTION?

The BBQ Pit
1

Allow me to acknowledge that some teen mums are damn good mums, and that being unmarried doesn’t mean you’ll be a bad parent. Also, this rant doesn’t apply to people who’ve fallen on hard times after having children.

Another acquaintance is pregnant. Unemployed, unmarried, part time boyfriend who beat her, fresh from a suicide attempt earlier this year, I don’t expect to see her winning any prizes for well-planned parenthood, but what boils me up is that she’s not the only one.

I have seen so many unsuitable, unstable and unprepared couples become parents to poor little innocents who didn’t choose to come into the world. These people uniformly announce “S/He was a surprise!” and “I wasn’t trying to get pregnant!”, but most of them will admit they did nothing to prevent it. And what do they have to offer a child? Nothing. No home. No money. No future. One couple I know was giving serious consideration to the issue of whether or not to have a second child. Boggle It might just be me, but I think that any couple that is comprised of two people who have never been employed in their whole lives shouldn’t be popping out kids for the taxpayer to feed.

Another couple had two children. Didn’t get married, just stayed together long enough to have the kids. He cheated on her, stayed with her a bit longer, and then cut loose. When asked, he says he never wanted to marry the mother of his children - that he never felt that way about her. If he didn’t want to make a lifetime commitment to her, if he didn’t “feel that way” about her, then why did he create two children with her? Children are an even greater commitment than marriage, and the children have no say in the matter. I would have more patience with someone who married unwisely than who reproduced unwisely. Why would you have kids with someone you don’t want to spend your life with? What, did she “trick you into it”? Yeah? Twice? Ri-i-igh…

Children deserve the best start in life possible. The ones I’ve mentioned above may turn out alright despite their parents, but it’s my guess that at least some will repeat the cycle of careless breeding. Worse, these children are growing up thinking that it’s normal for both parents to be unemployed, that welfare payments are their right and that relationships are made to be broken. The damage caused by these irresponsible people will echo down the generations.

Not one of these couples has ever married. Sure, some people chose not to marry because they don’t need a piece of paper to confirm that they’ll stay together forever, and I respect individuals rights to marry or not to marry. But the reasons these couples haven’t married is because they either fight so much they barely stay together, or they have barely been together any time before their kids come along. That’s why I don’t think they should have children together - if you don’t have the kind of relationship that you’re prepared to commit to forever, then you have no business having children! Children ARE a lifetime commitment, more-so even than marriage.

And what pisses me off is the knowledge that, if I ever have children of my own, they will be attending school with these children-of-children. The son of the pregnant girl I mentioned first will hit my kids like he saw Daddy hit Mummy (if Mummy and Daddy are still on-again, off-again by then). The daughter of the eternally unemployed couple will teach my children to swear, because Mummy can’t utter a sentence without profanity, and that child’s third word was “Fuck”. The deserted children of the absent father will grow up to be potential suitors for my children, but won’t ever hold down a relationship because the adults in their lives haven’t shown that it’s possible to be with just one person. The emotionally disturbed offspring of the town’s single, teenaged, drug addicted mothers will influence my children’s lives, and it drives me crazy to know that.

I condemn you all for your reckless and destructive behaviour. I hope against hope that your children grow up right despite your best efforts to ruin their lives. And I pray that we don’t all reap what you’ve sown.

2

Completely unrelated to the OP. I have heard of birth control. Thank the Gods that I am effectively sterile. Children are a menace and should be wiped out. :stuck_out_tongue:

HUGS!
Sqrl

3

I know two single mothers living on welfare (one with one child one with two) who, upon being told they had to get a job and get off welfare, immediately got pregnant! Now they are still on welfare and raising more children.

One of them is a child who was raised on welfare by her mother.

4

Good for you!

Perhaps you could educate the young lady who inspired my rant :slight_smile:

5

Completely unrelated to a great rant, but this line;

struck me as neat. I don’t give in to the language police, and a little kid saying “fuck” would be quite amusing, especially watching prudish people react to it.

6

Excellent point made in your posts.

I will take issue with you on one point–I have a few friends that were born out of wedlock to unmarried, drug-addicted, deadbeat parents. These children are fine specimens of human beings now. I would not hesitate to do anything for them and them for me. They have taught me a great deal about strength and courage, because they are discriminated against because of their parents. It’s really a damn shame.

The sins of the father don’t always move onto the child.

Otherwise, beautiful rant.

7

Actually, I was there for it.

The baby was 11 months old, and had said “Mum”, and (possibly) “Nanna” in the weeks prior.

The mother was impatient, waiting for someone to arrive and said “Where the FUCK is she??”, and the baby said “Fuck!”.

I freaked, then I laughed my ass off. The father turned to the mother and said “You’re going to have to stop swearing in front of her”. Meanwhile, I’m cooing over the baby saying “Did you say Truck? What a good girl!! Did you say Duck?” :smiley:

That woman swore so much, I’m surprised it wasn’t baby’s first word. I mean, I’m no prude. I use the F-word. But I don’t use it in every sentence. I say “very” instead of “fucking”, especially when in mixed company. The woman in question is responsible for the phrase “feral as fuck!”, which impressed some people for all the wrong reasons :wink:

8

Actually the young lady in question likely falls into the latter part of my statement: Children are a menace and should be wiped out.

HUGS!
Sqrl

9

my two-year-old stepson says “shit” now and then. it doesn’t bother me, personally, but i try to discourage it anyway because a) it bugs his dad; and b) i don’t want him teaching it to other kids. i don’t want to deal with their irate parents.

but i really don’t see that it’s so horrible. it’s just a frickin’ word. not even a very creative one at that.

10

There are a couple of those breeding monsters in my class…

Exhibit A: “N” prides herherself on her ability to bed the boyfriends of other women. She is about 20-21, and has a georgous one year old boy… she had him after sleeping with her sisters boyfriend…you guessed it! He also knocked up the sister.

Christmas dinner will be alot of fun at her house!

(she also brags daily that she can drop off her kid still in his pj’s and diaper from the night before at her babysitter’s house who will feed him breakfast, lunch and dinner, bath him etc. She thinks its great, I find it overwhelmingly sad.)

Exhibit B: “C” is borderline retarded, she is tremendously obese, has nervous twitches, overall, the most pitiful sympathy inspiring individual I have ever met. She is also 20-21, and has a 6 yr old boy. SHe was a smoking drinking maching until 3 months ago, she was living with her parents who have now moved to another country they had been raising junior. She also isnt sure of the fathers identity.
She brings in about 700 dollars a month on her grant for school (its not welfare, its a govt grant for people who were laid off,to impove their skills) I tried to help her with her budget, she needs another 5 hundred a month to break even… she just doesnt get it. She is sadly harmless, but completely unequipped to raise a child, her parents should have kept the kid when they moved.

OTOH, some people who you think would be terrible parents find themselves frantically try ing to better their lives for their much loved children.

Or affluent people who have been married a long time who STILL make terrible parents.

I agree with the OP, but on a broader scale, most people arent great parents, alot of people are only decent parents,or substandard… regardless of age or financial ststus.

11

I grew up around parents that tried to keep bad language from us as long as possible. While my brother can now swear without fear, my mother still smacks me if I do because she says it’s unattractive, coming from a “young lady”.

I’d like to see my children develop a vocabulary that’s more expressive than “Oh shit”, or “Fuck off”. There’s a time and place for everything and in my household, childhood and in front of me aren’t that time and place.

I swore for the first time when I was 12. I remember when and where and why. I just think profanity belongs in the realm of adults, not babies.

12

That’s kind of the way I was raised, too. My parents curbed their language around me, but they didn’t shy from swearing when there was no alternative (burn hand on iron, parents sees that child has cut finger off in folding chair, etc). I grew up with a sense that swearing, like driving a car or drinking a beer, was a perk of adulthood and I was probably 12 or 13 before it occured to me that I might be able to swear.

Also, I think this approach (initially) preserved the impact of curse words on me and fostered a sense that they were most effective when used rarely. Now, of course, I swear like a sailor. Don’t know what happened there.

13

Who cares about kids cursing? Thats small potatoes next to some brood mare who should’nt have had kids in the first place.

The only way to limit this kind of behavior is to end ALL welfare for kids born out of wedlock. Thats right, no AFDC, no food stamps, no WIC, no taxpayer subsidized health care, no Head Start, no section 8 vouchers, no “free” school breakfast, no “free” school lunch, and none of the other HUNDREDS of welfare programs which the government offers at taxpayer expense. If these women want to crap out kids that they cant afford, let them take of their own offspring.

14

Sorry, thats ‘care of thier own offspring’.
Seriously, there was a study that came out a couple of years ago that said that most cases of welfare would be prevented if the parents would only:

Both graduate high school.
Wait till they were married before haveing children.
Not have children until parents were at least 25 years of age.

15

It has been suggested, only half-jokingly, that the very existence of contraceptives will result in the elimination of foresight and responsibility from the human race. People irresponsible enough to never use birth control will outbreed people who do.

16

Lumpy- While I never thought of it that way, I think you’r right on.

17

Yeah, Lumpy. It’s also been suggested that if we respectable white people don’t step up our baby production, then this country will be overrun with immigrants and Negroes.

In other words, that argument has been used for well over a hundred years, usually in the context of racism or nativism.

18

BTW, Lumpy–I was not accusing you personally of being racist or nativist.

19

Guess what. “Fuck” was my first word. Now, my parents weren’t the swearing types, but they managed one of those infamous Jack-In-The-Box fast food places that actually used to exist on the east coast in the 70’s. Whenever one of their idiot employees called in sick, they were expected to come in to cover for them, no matter what the hour. Some times this happened when one parent was already working. Appearently it’s hard to find a babysitter at 12am on a weekend, so I, and a playpen, would be parked out back for an hour or so until one of them got off and we could go back home. The teenage customers, being the polished individuals they were, used “fuck” about five times a sentence. Despite being in the back room, I guess I could hear them well enough… My poor parents. At least “mama” and “dada” came next.

20

Hey Green Bean- It was the abortionist heroine Margret Sanger, founder of Planned Parenthood, who feared immigration and the high birthrate of blacks .

Infidel- Once again turning the liberals words against them!