Have You Ever...?

subtitle: The Fog Of Deep Sleep and Much Needed Rest

Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night at someplace besides your usual habitat?
In a land far away from your home because you are on a road-trip and someone you just recently met has offered their spare bedroom for the night?

Furthermore, have you awakened sometime during dark-thirty and experienced pitch-blackness in said room? A darkness that encompasses your entire being and all that which surrounds you? Smothering you into exasperation and panic - even after your tired eyes have had time to adjust to whatever nonexistent ambient light there might be?
And you suddenly remember having a fine time with your new hosts earlier, with much drinking, joking, and all around genteel carousing earlier?
Plus, in your disorientation, you realize that could have been ages ago. Perhaps decades?

But then, after calming yourself, you realize that it is very silent in your world?
Too quiet. Eerily quiet.

So there you are. A stranger in a strange land. With your sense of orientation having collapsed and having to pee so badly it actually hurts.
And not only do you not know where the door is, you can’t remember what town you are in, let alone which state? Or even what time zone?
Unsuccessful at even finding a light switch that might end your panic?

Ever had that happen to you?

No? You haven’t?
Oh. Um…
Yeah, me neither.

Anyone else want to share their experiences of stuff they haven’t done.

Did you Evah?

THAT brought back some memories!

Another embarrassing moment…

Have you ever got the household trash bagged and ready, then decided to just plop it on top of the car since you had to drive somewhere anyway, and might as well just drop it in the dumpster on the way out?
Then forgot about it?
Until it flew off the car, onto a very busy street?
During the lunch-time rush hour?
Scattering all that crap over 3 lanes of perfectly good concrete?

You haven’t?
Umm…yeah, me neither…

Did you ever take your glasses off because they were all foggy, put them on the car while you were trying to get the frozen lock opened, then drive away and spend the whole day trying to look like its a sexy squint instead of a “I’m blind and can’t get new glasses because I can’t read the employee manual” look?

Nope, me either.

Did you ever know that the landlord was coming over and hide the plastic dog bowls in the oven because she didn’t know you had a dog, and forget about them and then preheat the oven later on, creating a big stinky smoky melty mess all over the inside of the landlady’s oven?

Oh, yeah, me neither!

I never did that w/ bags of dry cat food either.

I wonder if anyone has even been on the house phone when their girlfriend stopped by on the way home from work. I wonder if such a person would go outside with the phone and put it on top of the car while chatting with the female human. I wonder if that unfortunate man then walked away without grabbing the phone again. I wonder if the girlfriend’s dad was very confused to see a phone resting on top of his daughter’s car when she got home.

It has certainly never happened to me.

Yeah, I’ve never done that at least three times.

I’ve never driven somewhere with an expensive camera on top of the car, iether.

I never drove off w/ my newer boombox on the trunk lid.

As a tween I was visiting my aunt and uncle. My adult cousin Bob had twin beds in his room, so that is where I slept. Oh, Bob had Downs syndrome…very high functioning, but that is why he was a 30 something and still living with the folks.

Anyway, I woke up in the middle of the night needing to pee. It was absolutely pitch dark in that room. So I felt my way to the bedroom door, opened it, and walked into the closet. So I then felt around some more, and finally found the bedroom door, and walked into the closet again.

So I started looking for the light switch which I couldn’t find. Totally frustrated, I decided to go back to bed and try to hold my bladder 'till morning. So I felt my way back to my bed and climbed in…right on top of Bob who kind of freaked out, but got over it and turned on a light so I could find the door and go pee in the bathroom.

Sunglasses for me. Not even an hour old.