And, yet, infinitely more disgusting.
Amy, welcome to the nut house 
Hope you did well on your History final.
Sheesh! I finally got the computer back.
How come I never got this kind of welcome when I registered?
I want to remind you people that this kid is a rank newbie and should be ignored for at least 100 posts. Make that 200.
And guys, she’d be a lot better looking if she took after her father.
hey Amy, did you happen to miss that pass?
Wally, step out of the way, would ya?
thanx 
Hi Amy. Welcome to the board!
I too am a recent graduate from grade 13… HOw was it?
With respect to felching, ask Richard Gere.
OK, so that story probably isn’t true. Who cares? All of us straight guys hate Richard Gere.
But welcome again, to the board. You’ll soon find out what kind of freaks your dad corresponds with. Useful ammo for when he give you a dirty look when you bring home a male friend he doesn’t approve of…
In the meantime, get to know the board. We might actually sucker you into becoming one of us.
“An unlesson’d girl, unschool’d, unpractised;
Happy in this, she is not yet so old
But she may learn”
–Merchant of Venice, Act 3, Scene ii
Amy, I would explain felching to you just so you wouldn’t wonder everytime you see it in a post (and for something that all of us find so repulsive, it certainly does come up often enough…) *but I don’t want to be known as the evil (;)) poster who corrupted Wally’s little girl!
Then again, I was the one who brought the recent North Carolina Doper’s bash to a screeching halt by bringing up that very topic…
Anyway, glad to have you on board and looking forward to seeing more posts by you!
You know people, she might just be into that sort of thing!
L
As if Wally didnt like me enough already…
Hi, Amy - welcome to the SDMB! Really cool dad you’ve got there. We’re delighted that he suckered you in . . . er, that you have chosen to honor us with your presence.
Happy posting, Amy!
Hi Again, Amy!
I hereby shamelessly pad my count, and bequeath my 800th post to you!
Hi Amy. I would have welcomed you earlier, but I was doing family stuff last night. That’s what I get for having relatives with birthdays…
Anyway…WELCOME! It’s so nice to have you here! Sit back, relax, put up your feet! Enjoy!
I look forward to seeing you around.
Oh, Amy…When will you be sending your picture to Techchick for inclusion on the women of the SDMB page?
(When what freezes over, Wally? My My.)
Hi, Amy! Welcome. I don’t think I even have as many posts as you yet (maybe) but I’ve been lurking for quite a while, too. Hope you enjoy the board as much as I do.
As for the felching thing, although I’ve heard of it for years, I’m not even sure that this is something people actually do, or someone with a very wild imagination made up. You really aren’t missing out by not knowing. If I could erase the definition (and visual imagery that follows said definition) out of my head, I would.
Welcome Amy! Fine Daddy you got there.
If you start to experience any youthful wanderlust, just hop on that beautiful Harley out in the garage and head South. It’s a short ride to a certain crossroads out here in the Delta, and a midnight deal can be made so’s I can finally get that coveted motorsicle. Wheee!
Wally said:
(Assuming my best bad-acting, intense, Patrick Swayze, “Dirty Dancing” look at Wally …)
Nobody puts Amy in the corner!
Hi Amy. I’m Milo. I’m almost from Canada. I come into good threads late. It’s my trademark.
See ya around.
[hi, jack] Funny, I don’t hate Richard Gere.
And it doesn’t bother me at all to know what felching is. Doing it, that could bother me.
Ah, well.
Then again, I have a pretty obscure internet identity anyway, so no one need know whether I am a straight male. But for the sake of argument, do all (other) straight guys really hate Gere? How odd. He does well in Hollywood, and it’s hardly woman-dominated–oh!
Oh well, I think Gere’s kind of cute. Oops, there goes my straight-guy cred! Maybe the Straght Dope Gay and Lesbian Task Force will try and convince me that I’m really one of them deep down. …hmmm… naah! [bye, jack]
Welcome, Amy!
Even if you weren’t the daughter of Wally, your writing style already marks you as another welcome addition to the board.
You don’t really want me to dig up those old posts of yours, do you Wally? 
See you around, Amy!
The funniest, or most ironic, section of this thread has to be…
Wally (screen name, anyway)
(Yeah, right, Wally. And Coldfire doesn’t know what a goat’s butt looks like…)
Amy:
I knew that something was definitely wrong when Wally denied knowledge of ‘felching’. This Wally/Amy thing reads like the setup for an episode of ‘Gilligan’s Island.’
Welcome, Amy.
Welcome Amy.
I won’t tell you what feltching is either although I am probably one of the few here that could give you the real scoop on what it is. And if you go searching, it really does NOT involve a straw. That is wrong information.
And if that didn’t get enough of the “yuck factor”, not only is your dad consistently funny he is a cutie too. I can see why he said you would be a lot cuter if you took after him. (VERY VERY EVIL GRIN) We’re allowed to pick on her from the start aren’t we, Wally? (strokes Wally’s ego to distract him from the spiderwebs in his hair.)
We aren’t really that bad. I hope that Wally said good things about me. The requisite lie, “Yeah, you are his favourite poster” would be an appropriate response.
HUGS!
Sqrl
Well, I’ve been lurking long enough so I guess it’s time I popped in for a quickie… er… a quick “hello” that is.
A very warm greetings and salutations Amy.