Help. 16 cubic feet...!

Yesterday, UPS brought us a very large box (hereafter VLB). This VLB is about four feet high, two feet wide one way, and two feet the other.

The problem with the VLB is that, after removing the contents, it’s still full nearly to the brim with Styrofoam peanuts. We’re assuming they’re not the biodegradable kind, and storing this VLB until we eventually use up the peanuts is not very practical—there’s no room for it anywhere and we don’t ship stuff.

Any suggestions, Dopers? What do I do with sixteen cubic feet of Styrofoam peanuts? We’ve already ruled out feeding them to my siblings.

Paint some of them orange and leave them in opened cheetos bags at school or work! Nasty, but diabolical! Gives those danged moochers something to think about, too! Of course, napalm is another option …

You can go two ways with this. There’s the Green Thing, and the Sensible Thing.

The Green Thing is to call your local recycling center and see if they’ll take them. Or call UPS and see if they’ll take them. Or if you have a Mailboxes Etc., ditto. Then you can drive all over town finding a home for your peanuts.

The Sensible Thing to do is just very quietly put them in the trash.

(I hereby give you permission.)

Here’s what you do if you (or someone you know) enjoys sewing: Sew a big empty cloth bag in the shape of a bean bag chair (use a real one for the pattern). Leave an opening. Fill with pellets. I’m guessing that from a box that size, you could make 4 or 5 chairs. I’ve got one such in the corner of my living room, and they’re as comfortable as the regular ones.

First of, you could check if they ARE biodegradeable. Just drop one in a glass of water and see if it dissolves.

Otherwise:
[ul]
[li]Take it with you to the nearest mall parking lot and start looking for a convertible.[/li]
[li]Buy some superglue and make a giant all-year-snowman for your front yard.[/li]
[li]Make cheapo bean bag chair with a garbage bag.[/li][/ul]

If you do gardening and have really heavy clay soil like we have around here, you can shread in up and mix it in with the dirt. Lots of potting soil have Styrofoam pebbles in it to absorb moisture and keep the dirt from packing.

The other choice is, do you have a “friend” that you don’t like very much? Tape the thing back up, address it and call UPS. Send the thing to them, it shouldn’t cost much for a box of Styrofoam peanuts.

Jim

I recently saw a photo of a practical joke that used the packing material to fill up an office cubicle. A piece of clear plastic sheeting was used to close the entry-way and then the area was filled to the top of the cubicle walls with the Styrofoam peanuts. Don’t know the story invovled or the aftermath of the joke, but it sure was a funny sight. If you have a friend with a serious funny bone or a score to settle with a co-worker…