Quasi
The Dope would not be the Dope without you. I don’t have PayPal, but I’m e-mailing TubaDiva as soon as I post this. I will send what I can.
God go with you, dear friend. Hang in there. We will help.
I had a small balance in my paypal…I sent it all which accounts for odd amount 
Although I have never posted in any of your threads, I read most of them while I was lurking on here for the last few months.
I hope things get better and you find the rest of the help you need.
Shannon
Quasi, I just want to give you my best wishes. I’m not in the best position to give advice, but it seems like Oakminster and a few others are offering you very good advice. I hope you trust them and take their advice because it seems very sound and knowledgable and I know they have your best interests at heart. Together I hope we can ease your circumstances and improve your state of mind. You certainly don’t deserve to worry and feel bad about yourself. Just do what you have to do to take care of yourself. Bolster your self esteem with the knowledge that other Dopers hold you in high esteem in their hearts and are on your side.
Exactly. Quasi, I consider you a peer. And I recall how kind you were when I was having emotional problems of my own. You’re a good egg. You must own what you have earned, and you have earned our respect and admiration.
Lib
Late to the party, as usual.
Hang in there, Quasi!
Not as late to the party as me. 
Quasi, one week from today, we will have an infusion of income (is that even a real phrase? Ah, screw it. It’s not like you’d know.
), and I will jump on this bandwagon.
The Dope has been here for me, as a community, more times than I care to remember, and in return, I have to be here as a functioning member of said community.
I wish, with all my heart, that it weren’t necessary for you to do this. That you were whole and healthy again. But I can’t do that. The least I can do is wish you the best, add you to my prayers, and make a small contribution to your cause.
The late crowd is the coolest I hear. 
Quasi, the situation is not of your making. You acted in good faith, and are still doing so. There is great advice above, you couldn’t do better than to go with it.
I hope at least the Dope can help relieve a little stress.
Good luck with everything!
Hey Quasi. I’ve been following your blog for some time now and enjoy that you’re sharing your journey with us.
Things are tight for us right now as hub just had back surgery and has been off work since March but I’m sending what I can. I just wish it were more. You have the respect of everyone here. We all fall on hard times every now and then. Go with pride, my friend. You deserve it.
Quasi, the system is there to help folks like you. Don’t feel bad about using it. Get the help you need. You don’t deserve it any less than the guys you think about.
I’m having an extremely tight time financially right now (credit cards are dangerous, people! BE CAREFUL!) and can’t send anything but good wishes. Those, now, I have an unending supply of. Have a bunch.
Quasi, by “veteran” I assume that you’re eligible for services through the VA. Next week, you are going to want to locate and talk to the veterans service office in your county. There are programs in place through the state and federal governments that you can qualify for to help with your medical and legal issues. County assistance workers care about veterans and can move mountains when it comes to navigating through the system; at minimum, you won’t have to do it alone. Please take advantage of them.
You’re also going to need copies of your DD-214. You can get them here. This will take you to a wizard that will generate a form for you to sign and fax. (Again, the county veterans service office can help with this.) Make sure you request multiple copies and keep one for your own records.
Good luck. Let me know if there’s anything I can do.
Quasi, I’m going to send you something. It won’t be much because I’m unemployed right now, but I KNOW if I were the one in trouble…or ANY one of the rest of us for that matter, YOU would be one of the first to help. You are one of the kindest, sweetest people I know. Take the advice given that you need to worry only about your needs right now, and not your credit card bills. Do not beat yourself up about it. You are not a thief or a credit bandit. You are not a bad person. You are a good person in a bad situation and you are not alone my friend.
Unfortunately, I can’t help too much since I’m in Pharmacy school and have no extra money, plus I have a baby on the way. However, if the drug’s you are taking are a financial burden, I might be able to help. Send me a PM with the list of drugs you are prescribed, and how much you are paying for them, and I can see if there is anything I can do to help you. I might be able to suggest other drugs that are equivalent and cheaper you might be able to take instead, or I might be able to direct you to some resources that might be able to help you pay for them.
Either way, I hope you the best, and hope you can get the help you need.
If you don’t already know, most drug companies provide free or greatly reduced-price medications for those people with limited incomes. If you have any higher-priced or non-generic medications go here to see the available plans. The pharmaceutical companies make large profits and this is their small way of giving back (and encouaging you to stay on their medication). Take advantage!
Not only with funds, but also with information and blessed good wishes!
I’m kinda wore out right now, but rest assured everyone will be the thanked and not forgotten.
I’ll be back on as soon as I can and work further on the thanks, but when D comes home and sees my swollen feets?
She’s gonna think I been WoW’in all night
She will be wrong, my sweet wife. I have just been sitting here marvelling at the outpour of love from this wonderfl place.
It is right now 4:40 am in Georgia, and as usual, I cannot sleep, but when I do go to bed, it won’t be due to exhaustion, this time.
Thanks to my kids.
:)Quasi:)
Unfortunately, I am also in dire financial straits and also trying to help my husband through the disability gauntlet so all I can offer are my sympathies and my best wishes.
I will, however, say this: the ability to declare bankruptcy is given to us by the US constitution. It is there to allow someone who has suffered misfortune (which you have) to get out from under debt they can no longer repay (which sounds like your situation). Although it is all too often used for purposes that border on abuse, your case is precisely why we have bankruptcy. To allow you to “reset” and get on with your life. When you incurred that debt you were able and willing to repay it. Now, through no fault of your own, you can not and likely will not be able to do so in the future. Please consider this option. It is hard, but it may also be your best financial option over the long run.
Yeah, let me tell you where the Kitty household is at (not to play one-upsmanship, but to show you how quickly things can spiral out of control):
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Mr Kitty lost his job in May of 2008 due to his medical issues (CF). That was the start of a very long week that included his father having multiple surgeries and his mother committing suicide the day before Mother’s Day.
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He went into the hospital for a ‘tune-up’ in June, and within less than 48 hours was on a vent. Eight days later they got him off it, but it was over a month before he came home. That hospital bill- WITH my insurance, was $350,000.
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He applied for disability, was denied the first time due to a mistake in the paperwork. All our bills were behind. Foreclosure proceedings were started on our house in… October, I think. He found an absolute angel in the local Voc Rehab guy, who went with us to the SS office, made sure all the paperwork was correct, and has gone above and beyond what he’s needed to. Mr K was approved in November (actually the earliest he could have been anyway- you have to wait 6 months), first check came in December.
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Still, the only choice we had was bankruptcy. We have six college degrees between the two of us. This was not at all an easy decision. Bankruptcy papers were filed less than 24 hours before they auctioned our house on the court steps.
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The only debt we have to pay on for the next 5 years is our house and our tax debts. Still, they take all but about $400 of my check every month, and all but $400 of Mr K’s disability check every month. $800 to cover important things like gas, electricity ($300 per month on budget billing), food, medications (our pharmacy bill is about $600 per month in copays between the two of us), and basic daily living stuff is… not nearly enough. We had our trash service canceled (luckily we’re rural enough to get away with burning) and our home phone (not good when you live with someone as medically fragile as Mr K and are relying on the cell phone gods to give you a signal).
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Now, if we thought we’d averted disaster, we were sort of wrong. Mr K’s docs won’t submit his file for consideration by the transplant board because of our financial situation. Won’t be able to afford the post-op drugs. They’re trying to keep him propped up (which means two weeks in the hospital every couple months- he just had a stay in August) until the health insurance kicks in with his disability… in December of 2010. Yet they give him ~2 years to live without the transplant. :rolleyes:
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Just to continue the trend, the insurance runs out on our house on October 1st unless we get some major work done. So we might end up losing the house anyway, since obviously the bank would call the note once that happens.
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We don’t qualify for any governmental assistance, because I make too much money. They’re going by what’s on paper, not what actually gets taken home, and they’re always so apologetic and understanding about it. Sometimes I actually consider quitting my job so we do, but then we wouldn’t have health insurance at all and that would be disastrous.
I laugh when people at work ask how I’ve lost weight over the summer… extreme stress and poverty does that to you, duh!
So, my advice to you… first off, that you made too much money last year to qualify for assistance is BS. They go by what you’re pulling in now. Keep going up the ladder on that til you get someone who knows what they’re doing. Also, see if your SIL qualifies for any services since she has two other people with medical issues living with her.
Contact voc rehab. Mr K is going back to school and they’re footing the bill. That’s probably not an option for you, but they’re GOOD PEOPLE and they know the system better than anyone. They can point you in the right direction for SS. Plus they love to see people come in that have a genuine desire to overcome their issues.
Try to stay away from lawyers for the SSDI thing. They’ll wind up taking a portion of the check, and you can’t afford that.
Bankruptcy lawyers roll their fees into what you pay during the course of the bankruptcy, so you only have to come up with a nominal amount (it was $100 for us, and we’re just over the line) to file.
I need to run, but may add to this later, esp since I know the area you’re in.
You’ve been giving your whole life, hon. It’s time to let the circle of giving forward get closed.
I reread my previous post and realized the bit about credit cards might come across as rather insensitive. Sorry about that. I’m up to my ears in my own and am finally facing up to it, and it’s my own damn fault. Nothing like Quasi’s situation.
Have some more good thoughts, Quasi. I still have tons of those.
I’ve got good wishes for you. I tried to send some small money, but it’s not so easy from China. If I can figure out a way, I’ll do it.
I’m always amazed at the generosity of Dopers. When i went through bad times, people were there willing to help me in very concrete ways. I’ve met some true angels here.
group hug
Agreed. Please know that we care about you.