Anyone expecting an epic Evil Nazi Groundhog rant is bound to be disappointed. This isn’t even going to be close to the Revenge of the Groundhog thread. I’m not Scylla, and I’m not half so eloquent. I’m just a guy with a problem which leads to a General Question.
A woodchuck has made his home under my back deck. Until now that hasn’t really been a problem, and in fact he was almost welcome, given that he habitually mowed about eight square feet of my lawn for me. That all changed when he discovered my wife’s vegetable garden.
That little bastard is murdering her tomatos. He’s not even being polite and finishing one before moving on to another, like a mannerly houseguest should. No, he has to knaw away half of this one, then a third of that one, then take a couple of nips out of this other one, until he’s just about destroyed all the fruit on the lower halves of the plants. The sunofabitch has got to go.
The traditional remedy is not available to me. I don’t relish the thought of sitting out on the deck with the .22 waiting for Mr. Heffalump to stick his fuzzy little head out. It’s illegal to discharge a rifle in my neighborhood anyway, my wife’s cries of “can’t you just shoot the damned thing?” notwithstanding.
I can’t use one of those gopher bombs either. His burrow is right under the back door, and I don’t want to reenact the Battle of Ypres two feet from my living room. I also don’t want to take the chance that I might get some kind of poison all over the surviving tomatos (which I intend to eat), and I have to consider my neighbors. There isn’t enough clearance between the deck and the ground for me to reach his hole anyway.
Anyone who proposes that I get a cat will be ignored, but any and all other suggestions would be appreciated. Thank you.
Get a trapper who will set a killer trap. A ground trap that supposedly will not take off a dogs snout if he should get curious about the hole. The trap is laid in an entrance to a groundhog tunnel, and wait. Check it everyday for dead critters. Don’t be suprised if you do not get your poster critter on the first kill. You may have skunks raiding the garden, who may end up in your trap.
I have experienced this recently. Make sure your trapper does not go out of town without telling you, and make sure he is on call to retreive dead bodies asap.
Then use steel wool burlap, forgot the name, to plug the holes where the critter hangs out.
They’re cute until they get messy and invade your foundation! :smack:
Have you a friend that you can dog sit for? Maybe a powerful catapult sling would be cheaper and easier than a bow and arrow.
But for best results “Nuke them from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.”
You could trap him in a Havahart trap. Take him for a ride in the country and turn him loose. Rather than buy a trap, you might be able to borrow one from an animal shelter that does trap and release of feral cats.
We’ve had a lot of success with those Have a Heart traps. If I recall correctly, there was a large and a small version, and we got the larger one. Set the trap with some tasty bait near the entrance to its den or in your veggie garden. It’s possible you might trap some other animal, but if that happens, you just let it go and try again.
Once you’ve trapped the critter you have your choice of how to deal with it. If you’re not adverse to shooting it, you could drive it to a remote location and do the deed. Or you could just drop it off far, far away from your house (preferably in the wilderness rather than near anyone else’s house). Once you get rid of the groundhog, destroy its den - make it more difficult for the next one to move in.
Whatever you try, good luck! We hate the little bastards for destroying our garden over and over again. Even my wife wants them all dead, and she’s a gentle soul who doesn’t even kill spiders when they get in the house (she relocates them outside).
Relocating may be against local ordinances. Although I don’t think groundhogs are notable rabies vectors, most towns don’t want you shipping livestock around and maybe spreading diseases (or at least dumping your problems on the neighbors).
That said, I’m currently dealing with a groundhog infestation myself and the little bastard is certainly putting my pacifist instincts to the test. He’s pretty much stripped my zinnias and tomatoes, destroying the plants in the process.
I’ve read that ammonia will deter them. I’m also currently trying hot sauce and pepper and (TMI WARNING: um, marking my territory in the garden). I’ll let you know the results.
This is definitely not the worst suggestion. I don’t know what Albany and the surrounding country is like, but do you know anyone (or know anyone who knows anyone) who goes coon hunting and would loan you a dog for a few days? The coon dogs I’ve known are pretty smart, and pretty deadly for small wildlife. Our own dog (she has hunting blood but is gun shy and has never been hunted) is without doubt known as the Incarnation of the Evil One to the groundhogs, raccoons, and other small wildlife that approach the corn cribs or garden on our property. Bless her rapacious little heart.
I wouldn’t think tiwce about shooting a rabbit or a raccoon if given the chance to save my tomotoes, but for some reason the mighty groundhog/woodchuck/woody has a soft place in my heart. I will also suggest the live trap route. It sounds like baiting will be easy enough. Find a nice place in the country and let him go.
I once shot a woody and I feel bad about it to this day.
I’d rather not mess around with a dog, especially somebody else’s dog. Chucks have teeth and aren’t afraid to use them. The whole “Wild Kingdom In My Backyard” is a bit offputting anyway. Marlon Perkins I ain’t, and if I wanted to kill the thing I could come up with something more humane even if I can’t shoot it. I think.
I like the live trap idea, although as has been stated I’ll end up with a new problem (i.e. a live trap full of woodchuck). I did a little checking at lunchtime and relocating the beasty doesn’t look to be a problem. Any good bait suggestions?
While firearm shooting is illegal in your town, air rifles probably are not. I’ve killed rabbits and even a 'possum with my hand-pumped Daisy Monte Carlo. The first pellet won’t always kill, but it makes the critter wait until you ten-pump for the next shot. The CO2 models will give you a quicker interval between shots.
You cannot peacefully coexist with a woodchuck under your house. They are notorious for undermining foundations, so your house depends on getting rid of this thing.
Now you guys have me shopping for a new pellet gun.
By the way, if you (the general “you,” not Exgineer, who, even if he were, is married to Lady Macbeth, by the sounds of it) are averse to killing, a couple BBs from your trusty Red Ryder (“You’ll put yer eye out, kid!”) into Chuck’s voluminous butt will convince him the pickings will be easier next door.
Doing things to stink up or block up its hole will not be effective. It will either clean the tunnel out, ignore the smell (what smells bad to you, doesn’t necessarily to a woodchuck), or extend its tunnel in different directions.
I found a killer-smoke-bomb at the hardware store. It’s got a fuse, you ignite it and stick it in the tunnel (at twilight, when the critter’s in there.) The gas is poisonous, but disperses after a couple hours. It will kill the creature in its lair (so there’s no dead body to dispose of, nor stink) and it won’t affect your tomatoes. It won’t affect you, much, either, if you get a whiff of it (I did: instructions were to just breathe fresh air for a few minutes, and minor headache went away.)
There are two brands, one is yellow and one is black, but your local hardware store should be able to help.
We’ve had success with various kinds of fruit - apples (cut in half) and grapes come to mind.