I would like to increase my carbon footprint, but I do not want to spend a lot money. This rules out a big SUV or a private jet. I could start burning wood in the yard, but I am not sure how much that would do. What is the best way to increase my carbon footprint at a low cost?
Eat lots of baked beans. Cow farts are one of the biggest sources of methane pollution.
Nope, cow belches are. 
Use more disposable stuff, like plastic silverware. Buy bottles of water instead of a filter system or using the tap. Use your air conditioner more. If you recycle, stop.
Generally, increasing your carbon footprint means consuming more. That will cost you money almost any way you do it. Sorry. 
Vote Republican.
An add-on to what Mosier said: look for maximum packaging. If you are buying tomatoes or spinach, don’t buy the loose stuff. Get the pre-washed stuff in a fancy plastic container that you throw away after extracting the food. If you eat cereal, buy three of the smallest size available instead of one big one. I’m not sure, but I’m guessing that eating heavily processed food in general might help.
And don’t just use that AC, make sure you leave some doors or windows open when you do.
Oh, and spend hours in front of the open refrigerator door contemplating what to eat next. Then, look in the freezer and forget to shut the door properly.
I was hoping this would be one of those “Need Answer Fast!” sorts of questions, but oh well.
Let the air out of your tires until they are just inflated enough to drive on.
When buying things online, choose the seller who is furthest from you geographically.
Next time you get an oil change, ask for the oil back, then set it on fire.
Recycle your plastic by burning it.
Leave your oven on at all times. No more preheating!
Make your produce choices based on the greatest distance from point of origin to you.
Step 1: Construct giant carbon boot.
Step 2: Wear boot outside in mud.
Step 3: Enjoy results.
(What? Somebody had to say it.)
I like this one. The others seem expensive.
If you don’t want to spend extra money, you could just burn all your trash & yard trimmings. Prolly piss off your neighbors and maybe get a visit from the cops, but that should get some extra carbon in the air. If your neighbors and the cops don’t care, burn your neighbor’s trash too.
I think I can legally burn leaves.
Yes, because all Republicans hate the environment and want us to drink dirty water and breathe dirty air. :rolleyes:
I’ll let you in on a little secret about us Republicans…just because we don’t want the government to solve a problem doesn’t mean we’re not interested in a solution.
Just make sure you don’t burn any animal carcasses.
Cook all your food over a burning pool of gasoline.
Oh, carbon? Maybe a wood burning stove would be better.
In any case, you certainly want to chop down and burn every treee you can get your axe on. You get double mileage points for killing trees.
They apparently don’t have much of a sense of humor, either.
Maybe we need faith based carbon initiatives.
Eat meat, drive as much as you can, and have lots of kids. This last item works the best in the long run, especially if you’re American. What other act could you possibly undertake which would consume an entire lifetime’s worth of resources in one go? And you can do it every nine months (more if you’re male and non-monogamous). The government may even subsidize your efforts if you can’t afford it.
Wins thread!
deleted…not worth it.