Help Me Learn About (Women's) Shoes

So…shoes. I hate them. I don’t “get” them, but I find that I really want to understand. I get that matchy-matchy is bad now, but how do you know what color/style shoe to intentionally mismatch with your outfit? I sense it’s not really “anything goes”, but that there’s a rubric or key I’m missing somehow.

Say I’ve got a purple dress something like, oh, this. I’m not supposed to match the purple, right? Can I do another shade of purple? What about that brownish-greenish? Or the flecks of white? Do I have to avoid *all *colors in the dress and wear, oh, magenta? Lime green? Can I look at a color wheel and go opposite, or do I want to stay 3 or 4 “hues” but in the same color family?

And what about style? How do I know when it should be “strappy” and when it should be “sporty” or “slutty” or “sparkly”? Save me!
(I can’t decide if this should be IMHO, MPSIMS or CS. I’m going to go with “artistic” and “creative” and toss it in CS.)

This one is actually pretty easy.

You’ve got multiple colors in the dress, so unless you end up with Dancing With the Stars-type heeled sandals in ALL the colors of that dress, you’re not going to be “matchy” regardless of what you pick.

The color and style that you DO pick is entirely based on where you’re going and what type of image you want to present.

Here is a short (not exhaustive, and most certainly regionally-variable) list of options and what they say about you:

Metallic flat sandals (silver or copper/bronze would go best with that dress): free spirit, most likely shopping or wandering around, most likely daytime between 9:00-4:00. Do not wear after age 50.

Metallic heeled sandals: free spirit, partying or bar-hopping with friends. If it’s before 4 pm, you’re a bit of a show-off, if it’s after 4 pm, you’re just having a good time. Do not wear after age 50.

Black flats: sensible person, possibly works on feet all day, a little behind the trends (flats are on their way out now). More common during the day, very casual if worn at dinner.

Black pumps: sensible person, most likely wears the same few shoes with everything. Totally forgettable. Most conservative choice. Standard for dinner, church, “cultural” events, or fancy parties where people stand around with little shrimp things and say catty things between courses of champagne flutes.

Black strappy or buckly or trendy things: Trend-follower, but not too overboard about it. Good balance between fun shoe style and basic black to tone it down. Possibility of being noted for very stylish or very out-of-style shoe, so potentially dangerous choice. More likely for parties or less formal events. Very overdone for daytime.

Bright colors: Go with the brighter purple or the lighter blue, and add the following description to whatever one is on the shoe style: you’re a flashy person who either really likes shoes and has a lot of them, or one of those people who buys shoes specifically to GO with an outfit. The second option is currently seen as the sign of a less-fashionable or less-confident person.

Please don’t wear magenta or lime green shoes. Ever. Thank you.
For general advice, don’t wear more than one article of clothing of any exact color. To be safe, if you buy it all together in the store as an outfit, NEVER wear it all together.

THIS is what I’m talking about. Just NO. That is what Matchy Matchy is referring to. All she needs is some orange bangle bracelets and some orange earrings, and she’s set to go.

If you happened to buy that travesty of a pantsuit, here’s what you SHOULD do to create a few outfits that are fashionable, not matchy travesties:

Pair the orange blazer with a dark rust or moss green skirt, and a really dark tan shell or cami under the jacket. Wear shoes that complement the darkest thing you’re wearing (probably the pants/skirt).

Complement means pick a darker or lighter version of the color, or another color that goes well with it - like if you’re wearing a green skirt, brown or tan shoes would be appropriate, as would dark green ones.

On another day, you can pair the orange shell (the shirt) with a brown, tan, or cream (not white!) jacket, some khakis, and boat shoes.

Finally, you can take the pants out and shoot them. If you insisted on wearing orange pants, I would put them with a really long chocolate brown structured jacket, probably tunic-length to get rid of as much orange as I could. A fantastic rust and orange hat, and I’d give you some killer dark brown shoes and a really light cream top to balance all that orange on your legs, and give you about three shots of espresso to help you compete with your outfit.

See how each of those are using colors that “go” with each other, rather than matching each other? That’s the idea for everything.

The only thing I would add is that if you do go with a bold colored shoe that’s either not in the dress or a very small part of it, you should have another item besides the shoes that coordinates with the opposing color. I think a muted green bag along with coordinating shoes would look great with that dress, but it has to be something that pulls the color up from your feet. A neutral bag and chunky green necklace with the green shoes would work, too, but not a bag and a necklace.

Personally, at age 41, I’ve pared down my shoe wardrobe. A pair of neutral, a pair of black, and I’m done. Forgettable, maybe, but the rest of what I’m wearing along with my sparkling personality, really, no one cares about my shoes!

wipes a tear I think I love you.

Seriously, thank you so much. That’s EXACTLY the kind of thing I need. Really detailed, really clear about the “tone” of each choice…THANK YOU!

(I promise, no magenta or lime green shoes. Unless I find a really rockin’ pair of orange pants to wear them with. :wink: )

The thing with clashing colors right now… they’re calling it “colorblocking” (and fcs, I invented that in Spring 2009 and everyone thought I was crazy, now it’s in and I’m soooo over it…)… needs to be done with pieces in solid colors or, at the most, very clear bold stripes. A dress with a pattern like that isn’t a candidate for colorblocking.

Like previous posters have said, the key to successful colorblocking is to have at least two accessories be of approximately the same color.

Psh, only if it means she gives them to me! These are cute magenta heels and adorable ballet flats. I’d also wear the crap out of these lime heels in the summer. And not gonna lie, I’d totally wear these. :wink:

Here’s what I know about women’s shoes:

If they look good, they’re uncomfortable. The better they look, the more uncomfortable they are.

If they’re comfortable, they are, at the very least, forgettable in appearance. Truly comfortable shoes generally look hideous.

Most of them cost more than I really want to spend on shoes.

And it’s damn near impossible to find a women’s shoe that has a wide width and a high instep.

So, with all of these things, I generally buy men’s shoes.

^ This is also me.

There is an irony in how much of my work day is spent fixing “pretty shoes” that I will never, ever wear myself.

The bolded part, however, is utter bullshit. There is no particular age at which you are forced to transition to mumus and Crocs and ignore anything that tells you otherwise. Age has nothing to do with it - I know a lot of 50, 60 and even 70 year olds who can pull off a good metallic shoe because they get an appropriate shoe for their look. Metallics are basically neutrals and anyone can wear them.

You don’t have to go with something like this(which is a young style)- but something like thisis absolutely fine.

My friend’s 60-something mother wore a fantastic gold and white heeled shoe at my friend’s wedding this weekend, paired with a lovely knee-length purple dress that made her look 10 years younger and absolutely amazing.

Style matters much, much more than colour.

they are produced by a superior alien culture. they contain mind control devices that project a ‘buy me’ message to many of the species. because this has been in place for so long it has produced a ‘hive mind’ effect, so now you don’t have to be near the shoe, just an image of the shoe.

:rolleyes:

'Scuse my repeating myself, but we had a recent-ish thread on the philosophy of matching shoes and dresses where I said:

(bolding added by me)

While I totally agree with you, I still hold that there is a larger point about strappy sandal metallics matched with frumpy old person florals or God-Save-the-Queen twinsets. They just don’t usually GO with those types of clothes. If you’re a killer-in-shape 50-60-70-80-something who wears fashionable clothes and keeps her wardrobe up to date, then rock those shoes and clothes out!

But the OP was starting from a place of professed total ignorance, and one of the general rules (at least here in the conservative southeast) is that older women are supposed to be wearing more conservative and “ladylike” clothing and shoes. Just like the rule about times of day and types of events that different shoe styles work best with - it’s an idea that’s pretty common where I’m from, and people WILL judge you by your choices in that matter.

I don’t *like *that particular concept of limiting people’s choices, but I’m not going to steer someone potentially wrong just because I disagree with the prevailing culture - I’m trying to be a good guide here! (I also did warn that my advice was only in-general and culture/area specific, to try and cover my bases there.)

However, mnemosyne’s point about not being resigned to being fuddy-duddy is totally correct, regardless of where you live - there is no upper age limit on looking stylish and nice, and taking care with your accessories and shoes to look your best!

Yeah, I heard some old women just live in their shoes!

Yep, I concur - my mom is 66 and rocks a metallic sandal.

The bit about the lime green and magenta is a bit lame too - nothing wrong with this:

I would rock that shoe.

I almost linked that one too, Alice! I loooove it.

The reason the OP is confused about ‘shoe rules’, is because there are none. The days of “you can’t wear that, with that,” are over.

Magenta and Lime, are my favorite colors. Mt closet is filled with clothes in those colors. It would be ridiculous not to have shoes in colors I love also.

The only problem I have with metallic shoes, is they can look cheap. Also, they look better on tanned or dark skin.

Yeah, my 80-something (at the time) grandma is pictured at my sister’s post-wedding brunch in black leather pants and a tasteful mohair sweater. Trust me, on her, it worked. But Grandmom has always had her own set of fashion rules. She only stopped wearing the black leather miniskirt once she had the knee replacement, and even then only because she was self-conscious about the surgical scar. :cool:

Thanks again, y’all! Lots of good stuff here.

I am NOT fashion forward, by any means, so I read the over 50 part as intended - as a guideline for the fashionably conservative.

In reality, I’m a nurse by day (scrubs, comfy shoes, tres casual but a uniform of sorts, so I “get it”) and a houseschlub by night. When I hang out socially, it’s usually with a conglomeration of hippies and hipsters, and I tend to the hippie chic end of the spectrum. But I don’t even do that elegantly, rather I do layering tees and long skirts or jeans. Very boring, very comfortable. When I go to festivals, I get more creative, but it’s Burning Man creative, not Going Out To Dinner creative.

But I’d like to get a little more fashionable, within the constraints of my body shape (obese hourglass) and age (37), neither of which is as easily fixed as my ignorance. :slight_smile:

People who care about fashion are certainly alien to me. This all sounds terribly complicated. I have three pairs of shoes. One pair of black flats. One pair of tennis shoes. One pair of flip flops. I’m considering buying a pair of dressy crocs to replace the flats, not because they’re out of style, but they’re old and hurt my feet. I wear black flats with a brown purse, and I don’t give a crap.

Also, mnemosyne, crocs aren’t just for the over-50, fashion-backward crowd anymore.