Help needed disposing of dead body. Need answer fast.

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

Let’s see. You find a casket with a body in it under your house. You want it moved somewhere other than under your house. However, you have no idea who this person is, and no way of getting the death certificate necessary to get the permit allowing you to move the deceased. Of course, it’s probably illegal to bury people under your house, so you’re kind of screwed if you rebury it under your house.

I know somewhere there’s an answer. I’m thinking put stamps on it, place it in a mailbox and let the post office figure it out.
Any better ideas?
Yes, this really happened.

2

comment withdrawn

3

Okay, that’s one vote for shooting it.

4

Fire up the grill.

5

Don’t move it or you will get a ghost in your tv.

6

::Shakes Fist::

I was going to say ask Zelda Rubinstein

7

It’s OK - they moved the headstones.

8

Better call Saul. Or at minimum, do not use the upstairs bathtub to disolve it.

9

Don’t you watch CSI?
Call the police and the body will be removed at no expense to you.

10

Rumour has it that if you tell them there are signs of earth being disturbed in your back garden, they’ll come and dig it over for you as well.

11

Re-bury it somewhere discreet. The government can’t regulate what it doesn’t know about.

12

If it’s Tuesday night put it out by the curb and someone will come get it in the morning. Or is that different in other parts of the country?

13

Is it an expensive type of casket that just might save you a lot of money when one of your relatives dies? In which case keep the casket and quietly sink the body into a nearby body of water.

14

That’s apparently what the previous guy’s plan was.

15

Well, it is certainly an opportunity to discern mere ‘friends’ from an actual good friend.

Stranger

16

Serious me would just call the authorities and let them deal with it.

Smart-ass me would let myself into one of the seasonal haunted houses and set up a new exhibit.

17

Freecycle?

18

First you have to find out what diocese he is.

19

Of COURSE it’s different.
Here, it’s on Thursday.

20

But you’d have to lift him up to check the back of the neck… I’d just say “Looks a bit Barson-Wells-ish to me” and back away.