Help with A Living Will?

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

I hope this isn’t reviving a thread that’s been considered dead a while - I haven’t figured out timelines for that one yet.

Does anyone know of a FREE living will form I can fill out, or a FREE Will and/or Power of Attorney?

I just found out I had a big tumor removed from my neck. They just biopsied my lymph node under my chin, and I’m - shall we say - FREAKED?

Seriously, though, it’s gotten me thinking about how I would want things dealt with if I were in no condition to make the decisions for myself. My mom is a staunch pro-life advocate, and I respect her belief systems, but when I asked her about a scenario “like” this a while back, it became clear that despite her best intentions, she would be unable to follow through on my wishes.

Now, my dad probably would, but he lives in Wisconsin, and I live in California. I live with (for all intents and purposes) my fiance (but we’ll never get married - long story). I would like him to have a durable POA and be able to handle my Living Will. I plan on getting it notorized and making sure all my doctors have a copy.

This thing has given me a scare, and perhaops I am stingy trying to fins a “free” one out there, but crap, sdo you know how much a biopsy, CAT scan, PET scan, and pathology cost. (I am in that dreaded transion phase between insurances - it’ll be retroactive, but first it comes from my pocket.)

I am sure it’ll be all right - at least that’s what everyone tells me, in a kind of annoyed way (can’t I be freaked if I WANT???) (Crpipes!!)

So…any help? Yes, I googled, but I am having a really hard time keeping my attention span and my focus so anyone else who is a little clearer than me, I would dearly and deeply appreciate any assistance you could proffer.

I am not going to die. But having to go form using the workd “cyst” to “tumor” seems pretty radical to me. Although everyone elseseems to think I whould just shrug it off. My boyfriend actually yelled at me for “putting my life on hold”. Welll D U H!!! Until I know what it is, I can’t very well plan an attack or celebrate can I?That’s not enough, however.

Sorry. Ranting. Sorry. Not the place for it. My apologies.
Inky

2

If it’s any consolation, I’ve got one, and I did mine through a military lawyer.

IANAL, but basically, the idea is that the document is good in any state. You type a letter, physically read it, and sign it in front of no less than two people who countersign it. That way you have witnesses who’ll testify that that’s what you want. It wouldn’t hurt to have it Notarized either. . .

Tripler
But that’s just what I was told. YMMV.

3

IANAL etc. The three documents you mention (living will, will, power of attorney) serve different purposes and, at least in Wisconsin where I live, can be mutually exlusive or contradictory. The first thing you need to do is sit down, calm down, and figure out what exactly it is you want to accomplish. Are you wanting to instruct your doctors on the steps to take in the event of your medical incapacity? Living will (also known as an “advance directive to physicians”). Are you wanting to empower another person to make medical decisions for you? Durable power of attorney for health care (a general POA goes far beyond medical and would allow your designated attorney to dispose of your property and make other legal decisions). A will is for disposing of your property after your death.

It looks like this site offers the text of the CA advance directive, which you can copy and paste. I do not know if this is the complete legal form or what effect using copied and pasted text would have.

4

Thankyou for the assistance.

Anyone else? (Not that the two ideas here are not worthy - I just want as much information as I can gather.

But Otto and Tripler, thank you for your input. It means very much to me.

Ink

5

I am currently in the process doing a will. I’m in the service, and one the officers I work with is a lawyer, and he is doing these for anyone in the office who wants it. It’s probably the same as Tripler has described. I’ve seen the first draft, and it’s about 27 pages, but I believe it’s just a template and the good LT just fills in the blanks.

Anyway, I’ll talk to him tomorrow to see if I can just e-mail a blank copy out, or what.

6

I would be eternally grateful.

My e-mail is in py profile, if that helps. If it turns out that you cannot, I do appreciate the thought . It’s people like you folks at the 'Dope who have offered me the most hope so far.

Ink

7

After Scruloose’s post, I have to clarify my own:

My will in and of itself was also a twenty-some-odd page document, governed by the state I call “home” (being NJ). My ‘Living Will’ however, is it’s own seperate document, and again, was signed and counter-signed twice.

My thinking is that because my family resides in New Jersey, the will was written for that state. However, because I may become incapacitated in any state, the JAGs wrote it with the flexibility of being executed anywhere.

Clear as mud, eh?

Tripler
Let’s just hope that if I gotta go young, I go out with a “bang”! :smiley:

8

We got copies of living will forms from our local hospice. Give them a try.

9

Sorry, I didn’t realize that the site I linked required you to pay for the forms.

This page has a link to a California form of Advance Health Care Directive, which will allow you to both designate a health care surrogate to make decisions if you are incapacitated and to provide directions regarding your wishes for end-of-life care.

This site has a good FAQ about California advance directives, but it does not link to a form.

On Friday, I was just looking up the law for someone who wanted a New York living will and also wanted to know if it would also be effective in Florida. I found that Florida law provides that an advanced health care directive that is validly executed in the state it was executed in would be valid in Florida. I don’t know if other states have similar provisions, but I would imagine that most states with modern health care directive laws do.

Best of luck with your medical condition, and if you have any specific questions, please feel free to post or e-mail me.

Bill

10

Thanks Bill.

May not be the right place for it, but do you know anything about Squamous Cell Carcinoma?

They initially thought it was a cyct, and I think even the Doc was surprised when the path came back as a tumor. My lumph node right beneath my chin is very swollen and hurts, and there is another spot on my neck right in the jaw-meets-neck area that feels wonky as well.

I am having a PET scan on Tuesday and a CAT scan on Thursday, and meet with my ENT goy (who found the tumor) on Friday.

Funny note - the lady setting up the appointment for the PET scan said, "We’ll be giving you a muscle relaxer, so you absolutely cannot drive for at least four hours after the procedure. I was thinking to myself, Lady, I had a DUI, I absolutely cannot drive for a year after the procedure…

Okay, it was the only humorous thing I have ahd in the past week.

Inky

11

Good Og, please excuse the typos. I am not an ignorant person, it’s just really early here. I am not sleeping well and it leads to poor mispellings.

My apologies for those whom bad typing is a huge deal.

Inky

12

Well, Ink, my end of these things is the legal end, so I’m afraid I wouldn’t know a Squamous Cell Carcinoma from Sponge-Bob Square Pants (although I’m reasonably sure that most carcinomas, whether squamous or not, don’t live in pineapples under the sea). Sorry.

13

Er. thanks.

I think.

Not really a SBSP fan. Now if you’d said G-force (dating myself here…) I’d be with you.

14

Ink a dink a dink, I talked briefly with the attorney who works in my office. FTR, I only asked about sending out a blank template of the “Estate Plan” that he’s doing for me, and made no specific mention of why.

Anyway, basically he said that this particular template may not be the best thing to give out, as it’s geared for service members and is very detailed (27 pages). He didn’t, however, say that I couldn’t, so I’m gonna e-mail you mine once I de-personalize it. Give me a few hours and I’ll send it along.

What he did say was this: Check the state webpages or google for blank templates of wills and such. Billdo seems to have that angle covered already. He also said the important thing is just to get your intentions on paper - the specific type of document isn’t the important thing here. (He specializes in this type of law, so I presume he knows what he’s talking about.)

Check your e-mail in a bit, and I wish you the very best of luck with everything.

15

I truly am most grateful for all the assistance I’ve received.

Dopers are the highest quality folks with whom I’ve ever had the honor to interact.

If anyone ever needs anything from me, please don’t even think about it - just ask.

Inky

16

I can’t access your e-mail in your profile (there’s an option to allow/deny members access to it in user preferences).

If you want to keep it that way, just e-mail me, and I’ll send the template.

17

Sorry should be there now. I think.

Apologies.

18

Nope - still can’t see it for some reason.

Just send one to jpribek@pivot.net and I’ll fire it back to you.

19

Scruloose, that was perfect. I can adjust it to meet my needs specifically.

And if anyone ever takes a PET scan, I highly recommend Pacific Imaging in Oakland. They have me warm balnkets, swaddled me so my arms wouldn’t move, gave me a thank you letter (!), and a Peanuts sweatshirt. Aside from being the kindest, most helpful folks I’ve encountered. They were utterly fantastic.

Now I am trying not to self-diagnose according to what I see on the films but my tendency is to get right in there. Someone tell me to just knock it off.

Be well all, and thanks for all your help.

OH - One serious question about a living will and all the rigamarole that goes along with it - do you have to name an attorney? Some of the forms I saw said that it was best to have an attorney>

Inky

20

Just to update, the biopsy was negative, lymph nodes are fine, CT scan was great and PET scan as well. Only re-do the incision to make sure they grabbed it all and I think I am done. Except I have to wear SFP40 for the rest of my life. And a Chi-Chi beach hat…and I am NOT a beach hat gal…I am a LATEX queen. But they don’t make beach hats for that.

Do they even make SPF40 unless you live on the surface of the sun?

Thanks for everyone’s help here. It’s important to take care of these things even if the need is not as immediate as I dreaded.

You folks are truly generous, kind-hearted people.

Inky