My eleven year old sister will be getting a tooth pulled next week, and she is terrified. Since I’m the only one in the family who’s not bothered by dental stuff, and because she’s comfortable with me, I’ve been elected to go to the exam room with her. She doesn’t like going for check ups, and she cried and refused to open her mouth for awhile at the initial consultation. She’s going to a specialist for the removal, and she’s is even more nervous because she’s not used to him. The family doctor says that taking a sedative isn’t an option. Other things: She’s not afraid of shots. She gets an allergy shot every week, so the idea of getting the novocaine injection doesn’t bother her. It’s more of a general fear. The specialist does know about her problem.
So does anyone here have a similar fear? How do you get through it?
Maybe since she feels she can trust you, you can get her to open up her mouth ahead of time and poke around. It might be useful later on considering you’ll be in the exam room.
I’m terrified of dentists, or I was, before I found the Dental Fears research clinic at UW.
If there’s a dental school nearby, find out if the have a fears clinic.
They use visualization to help with the anxiety. They include the patient, even children in decisions. They give the patient some control over the situation by having hand signals that everyone in the room understands, like a raised right hand means STOP! The oneI go to has a psychologist that does interviews prior to a dentist ever entering the room. Here is a list of websites that might give you local information. Good luck.
And how about a mutually decided upon reward afterwards?
I mean something small. It may help.
Have you tried having the dentist take a look at your mouth first? I would take a look in her mouth as mentioned–it may help. Also, how is this being handled at home? I hope noone is adding to her anxiety by telling tales about their tooth pulling etc.
Just thinking out loud over here…
My daughter has a very sensitive gag reflex–making it hard to do a full exam on her at times. Patience on the part of the practitioner and a small reward eased the visits for us.
My daughter is 13. She was absolutely traumatized by a horrible dentist when she was about 9. We’ve found a wonderful pediatric dentist who gives her a drug to relax her before the appointment (it also tends to make her forget the appointment entirely). She also has the laughing gas and novocaine.
She had 7 teeth pulled at her last appointment :eek: (to make way for braces and some adult teeth that were trying to come in). She felt so good afterward that she wanted to go to the mall to go shopping.
Fear of the unknown can be quite powerful. (In adults as well as kids.)
Research the procedures she will have on the internet and discuss it with her. You may think that will freak her out, but it will remove the ‘unknown’ part. If she knows what the dentist is going to be doing and why, it may help her. Think of how scary a dentist visit would be for you if you had no idea what was going to happen.
Does she like books? Take along one of her favorites (or a new book as a surprise) and read to her during the procedure.
Ask the dentist if you could bring a small CD player to play some of her favorite music. heck, you might even be able to bring a portablt DVD player so she could watch a movie.
Thanks for the suggestions and links. There are some very good ideas here. I think my parents have put the bribery plan into motion, along with role playing discussion. It just seems like all the preparation goes out the window once she’s in the chair. Poor kid. Good idea about me personally working with her, as she could be sensing my parents’ fears.
Lissa, great distraction ideas. I’ll have my parents run them by the dentist. If they’re all ok, she can bring all three options and switch if one of them isn’t working out.
BoBettie, the doctor thinks that taking a sedative for the first time along with whatever the dentist will be using and the stress of it all might be too much for her system. She’s a healthy child with no medical issues though. Apparently, she has to go to this particular dentist for the upcoming procedure, but the idea of a pediactric dentist is definitely worth looking into.
No problem. In order to plan for this visit, have her take a small amount of the sedative in advance to see how her system handles it. I’m not a doctor. And I hate going to the dentist. There are pediatric dentists who specialize in fearful patients.
Tell your sister not to worry. I had two molars pulled a few years ago, with local anesthesia. The shot to administer the anesthesia felt like someone pressed a toothpick tightly against my jaw for a few seconds, followed by a coolness spreading within that area of my jaw. During the tooth pulling itself, there was literally no pain. None. And after the anesthesia wore off, there was no sharp pain, just a mild, general soreness in that area of the jaw, which went away within a day or two.
Treat your sister to something she loves as a reward. All will be well.
re: the music. I wouldn’t bring any “favorite” books or music with you. Those stories or sounds will be imnexplicably tied to feelings of fear and/or distress from that moment forward. The best stories or music are ones that are pleasant, but not personally meaningful.
To this day I can’t listen to Bach without cringing. I had a dentist that liked him a lot.
I am a very fearful patient with pretty bad teeth. An understanding dentist is key. One thing that’s good for relaxation is to wiggle your toes as you’re sitting in the chair. This unclenches the muscles of your legs.
Man, I have absolutely no good advice here, as I’m 24 and terrified of dentists. Had an extremely traumatic dentist visit about six years ago [involved pulling four teeth without anesthesia, haw haw, fun times]. Now I need to go and have four more removed [which is apparently going to involve jaw surgery] and I turn into a mass of sweat and nausea whenever I think about making the appointment.
Best of luck to the little girl. If it helps at all, you can tell her that she’s a hell of a lot braver than a grown woman you know on the Internet.
And you guys have made some good suggestions… I think I’m going to look into that fear clinic business.
Also, folks? Take care of your teeth. Take it from an idiot who knows. Parents, take care of your children’s teeth. Take it from the selfsame idiot who had neglectful parents, as well.
Thanks for the advice and stories. No worries about the DIY dosing. We’ll be following the doctors’ orders. Chatelaine, wow, no anesthesia? Do you mind me asking why? How horrible! Taters, that thing about the tylenol is interesting, and definitely something to ask about. The importance of music choice is something that I hadn’t thought about, and I’ll keep everyone’s thoughts on the subject in mind.
The good wishes are also appreciated, and I’ll share them (and the positve stories) with my sister.
[scary dentist story hijack]
Long story, but to sum up: I don’t respond to medications, painkillers, narcotics, etc. the way most people do. Add that in with a young, nervous, and inexperienced dentist [this was at a goverment facility, Job Corps to be precise]. She had given me seven shots of novacaine [or whatever equivalent was used at that time] and was afraid to give me more. Her thought was that I actually WAS anesthized and just didn’t THINK I was, so she started pulling. I think my shriek and the fact that I reflexively kicked over her tray of supplies let her know differently.
Bless her, she felt horrible, and told me that she wouldn’t do anything more but she’d refer me elsewhere – which would take six weeks minimum, since it was going through the government funding. There was no way I could deal with the agony my teeth were giving me [from before and now with the freshly pulled one] for six weeks, so I told her to finish the job. She did, the poor thing.
And now it’s still the same thing every. single. time. I go to the dentist. “I have this weird problem with drugs, they really don’t work --” “Oh, WE can numb you, don’t you worry, sweetheart!”
Riiiiiiiip. Shriiiiiiiiiiiek.
“…uh, I’m really sorry. I could have sworn you were numb.”
Just happened again about six weeks ago, and now I’m scheduled for oral surgery and supposedly they’re going to give me twilight sedation for it. We’ll see.
