I don’t see what the big fucking deal about requiring the hospital to make an effort to find the father of a child. A few phone calls, check with the IRS or whatever. I am not asking anyone to move heaven and earth just make a decent effor to find that person. Its in the best interest of the child to have an active father in its life. I would hate to find out 15 years after a kid of mine was born. Think of all the memories and experience that a father would miss in these years. If that isn’t reason enough we should be finding these guys anyway to make them pay for child support.
Wow, disagreeing with you makes me a ‘loony-ass’? I’m far from the only person in the world who thinks it sucks that men have no after-the-fact choice in parenthood but women do. Why am I the ‘loony-ass’?
Is it because you’re having fun with your little friends?
What exactly is stupid about my hypotheticals?
the case referred to earlier about the father who hadn’t known about the adoption of the baby gaining custody is about Baby Jessica renamed “Anna”
I haven’t even posed any hypotheticals.
It’s up to him to keep track of his own sperm.
Lots of people think it sucks, that’s true. Lots of people are not claiming the problem is some sort of issue with the laws and that it can be fixed by legislation. Most recognize if as a side effect of biology. You, however, continue to say this is a legal inequity versus a biological inequity. The law is equitable. It is life which is inequitable. Attempting to correct inequities of biology by manipulating law is generally a bad idea because no matter what end state you wind up in after monkeying around with the law, someone is still screwed.
Enjoy,
Steven
I wouldn’t ever call a fellow Pittsburgher loony-ass, but your entire thesis is not true. Men do have after-the-fact choices in parenthood. The playing field isn’t quite level yet, but it’s getting there. And all this energy spent plotting out ways to escape parenthood would be better spent plotting out ways to help families work.
You keep saying that but it is an unreasonable expectation. What do you have against a father knowing he has a child and a child knowing his father?
It’s a violation of doctor-patient confidentiality for a hospital to give out that information.
They can’t find out anything unless the mother tells them. And as you know, a baby can’t be adopted unless the father (if named) gives permission. I don’t know what else you want the hospitals to do. Tell the father before the mother can do so? Maybe he’s a psycho. Maybe she wants to break the news to him herself. Whatever. I don’t think it’s the hospital’s job to interfere in such a thing.
And just so it’s clear, yes, in most cases, I think the mother is morally obligated to tell the guy that he’s got a kid. This issue is one that is actually close to my heart, actually, since this situation could have happened to someone close to me.
I think that unless the father is a scumbag or unstable or something, it’s pretty shitty for a woman to not tell him that he’s a father. Pretty shitty indeed.
And in preview: thanks for the cite, wring.
You’ve had a long, rich history of extending threads (as wring has already pointed out). More than a few of us have noticed this.
All the father has to do is keep track of the women he fucks.
There is no need to give any information about the mothers medical condition. Just tell the father that he has a kid.
So you’re saying that if a man fucks some chick and doesn’t keep in touch with her then he should forfeiting his rights as a father?
Even saying that a woman has had a baby is a violation unless the woman give permission.
the father is also none of the hospital’s fucking business. Their job is to privide medical care and that’s it.
He can assert his rights at any time.
Diogenes-
Ignore the legal aspect for a second. Morally/Ethically why shouldn’t a father be informed that his child was born?
Read my post above. I think a woman is morally obligated to tell a guy that he’s a dad (unless he’s a nutcase or something). And no, I don’t think he’s forfeiting his rights—his rights always exist. However, if he can’t keep track of all the women he screws, he might be kept out of the loop. If he wants to minimize the risk of that happening, he needs to stay in the loop. If drops all contact with her makes himself scarse, he shouldn’t expect that she’ll go to heroic efforts to track him down to tell him.
What the fuck are you talking about? I expressed an opinion on page 1 that is controversial but nevertheless my actual, real opinion. I am making no intentional effort to ‘extend’ any thread. If expressing my honest opinion in the Pit is a problem, perhaps the mods should say so. Until then, you’re off your rocker for suggesting that it’s solely my fault threads get long.
As for ‘more than few of you’, well, I guess that’d be your gang of ‘if catsix said it, she’s a loon.’ Especially since nobody in this thread can accuse me of ‘misunderstanding’ the other side or ‘reading things that aren’t there.’ You might as well go ahead and blame Diogenes and yourself for this thread being as long as it is.
I don’t think your contributions to this thread are loony-ass because I disagree with them. I think they’re loony-ass because they’re, well, stupid and illogical and often incoherent.
Both you and treis have been frothing over the Baby Safe Haven program for most of this thread. Helpful tip: the existence and/or injustice of this program has nothing to do with 99.9999% of child support cases and thus irrelevant to the topic of child support. Using it as justification for why the current child support system is grossly unfair is, in a word, stupid. Going on and on and on about it is, in two words, really irritating.
What little friends? I hate wring like poison and yosemite smells like expired lunch meat.