I will eat green eggs and pepper,
I’ll even eat them with a leper.
I will eat them with the meek,
I will eat them with a Greek;
I will eat them with a whore
Who pours out perfume on the floor.
I will eat them with a stranger,
But not a temple money-changer.
I will not eat them with a slacker,
Or he who calls his brother “Raqa.”
I will not eat with Pharisees,
Or those who thank God on their knees
That they are not as other men…
I’m stuck for a rhyme. Help me out here.
That reminds me. . . .
The Kids in the Hall did a sketch once called The Bible, by Dr. Suess. One of the funniest things I ever did see. Course I don’t remember any of the lines, so I can’t share.
From the Cross our saviour’s wavin’
while our souls he is a-savin’!
Here comes his mother weeping sadly
and Magdalane, who loves him madly.
He’ll be remembered for his good deeds
but right now he bleed bleeds bleeds!
Still now cripples he is curin’
cause he’s on the Shroud of Turin!
My opinion couldn’t be higher
of our dear old, sweet - he washed their feet! he can’t be beat - our Messiah!
Part I… beware, I may write more 
God is faithful, God is just;
God won’t leave you just the crust.
When He tells you not to do
Things like shooting Dr. Who,
Do not whine, moan, or complain.
(You may face 40 days of rain.)
He made the eagle and the otter.
He can even walk on water.
In the end He is the best;
Jesus brings you peace and rest.
Can’t you people just believe?
If you just ask you will receive.
Here is the Kids in the Hall’s Dr. Seuss Bible sketch.
Judas I. Scariot, Will You Please Go Now?!?
One gnat, two gnat
One cat, two cat
one bat, two bat
one rat, two rat
One dog, two dog
One hog, two hog
One frog, two frog
One moth, two moth
One sloth, two sloth
P.S. A thread combining the Bible, Dr. Suess, and
Andrew Lloyd Webber. I love it!
Hmm. I have a couple of lines from that in my quotefile:
and
BOARD
LORD
Our Lord is on a board
FROWN
DOWN
We frown when they take him down
HEIST
CHRIST
There has been a Christ heist!
WE
SEE
HE
THREE
We see he on day three
How do we quiet this Jehovady din?
This is more T.S. Eliot than Dr. Seuss.
I am known as Abraham.
I don’t eat green eggs and ham.
I don’t eat forbidden meat.
Green eggs and ham I do not eat.
Okay, so I’ve got too much time on my hands…
Some Jews, His disciples, liked Jesus a lot
But the Pharisees up in the temple did not.
These guys hated Jesus, they called him a liar
For telling them He was their king and messiah.
They wanted him gone, so they pulled out the stops
And, bearing false witness, they went to the cops.
The Romans caught Christ when they staked out a park
Disciple betrayed him: 'twas Judas, the narc.
But Pilate just wanted to let Jesus be.
The Jews asked instead, “set a murderer free.”
A cross was then built out of wood for J. Christ
As a carpenter’s son, he offered advice.
And when they had finished the cross up just right
With nails, hooks and wire, they stuck Him on tight.
With thorns on his head and a spear in his side
He hanged there a few days and then sort of died.
He was stuffed in a cave, all wrapped up in a frock
And the cave sealed up tight with a cave-sealing rock.
But the Christians weren’t sad when the cave opened up
The Jews were confused, went to see what was up.
Well, this cave had no Jesus, no Tom, Dick, nor Harry
It couldn’t be so, but it was empty. Very.
They hadn’t stopped Jesus from coming. He came.
Three days or so later, he came just the same.
The Jews stood, their Jew feet in sand all unkempt
Puzzling and puzzling, “well, I’ll be verklempt.”
“He left not by camel. He left not by ass.
He had no internal combustion nor gas.”
They puzzled three hours till their puzzlers were sore
Then the Jews thought of something they hadn’t before
“Maybe Christians,” they thought, "shouldn’t just be ignored.
“There’s few of them now, but some day there’ll be more.”
And what happened next? Saul of Tarsus would say,
Whilst out killing Christians one bright summer day
The voice of God spoke from the sky, saying, “Hey!
Stop killing them Christians. It bugs me. M’kay?”
Then Saul (known as Paul), he began, it would seem
To convert all the Romans (good to have on your team)
He converted the Gentile, not only the Jew
And soon they were much more than ten men plus two.
And now that their cult didn’t seem quite so small
They pillaged and plundered and converted them all.
They burned witches and heathens, any one they could get.
And Christ, He himself, will come back for you yet.
OF COURSE you should be hearing eminem (or someone just like him) since the Seuss Man was THE ORIGINAL Rap Mastah!!! ALL up in that!! uh HUH uh HUH!!! 
I will not eat them in a BOX
I will not eat them with a FOX
Come on, people, that be righteous!
Will you eat flat bread and wine?
It’s flesh and blood. Now dine, dine, dine!
This is a meal you must not miss.
You must not miss the Eucharist.
Not quite Seuss, but still pretty good.
Please don’t bump old threads for no apparent reason. Thanks. Closed.