Hey, y’all, these are great! Way better than I had hoped for. Keep 'em coming!
I took my 8 year old son to see Return of the King when it first opened. During the Mount Doom scene, the dramatic tension got too much for him and he yelled out “Throw it in already!” The packed house was reduced to tears of laughter.
I’m sure this doesn’t count, and it probably won’t translate well, but I’ll give it a go – it does involve something at the movies.
Our local Mega-Plex has some sort of deal with one of the local television stations, and the disclaimer before the movie … “Please no talking, and turn off your cellphones, and exits are located at the back and front …” is presented by the local news team, of which there are several … anchors, sports guys, weather girls, they all have to get into the act.
Anyway, there’s one part where one of the talking heads says, “This film is presented in a digital format which means the last showing is just as crisp as the first.”
And then they flash to another talking head who’s only line is, “That’s cool.”
It’s just such a stilted, oddly delivered line – like he really wanted to be in the play, and this is the only line they trusted him with. My kids and I have totally adopted it as a pseudo-Rocky Horror type situation that demands audience participation. Every single time we go to the movies and they get to that part, we must look at each other and recite …
“That’s cool.”
Of course, loudly enough so our fellow theater-goers can revel in our wit.
Eh. It amuses us.
(unfortunately, they’ve updated the promo lately, so our entertainment dollar has been somewhat devalued)
When Braveheart came out, I went to see it with a group of friends. During the previews, there was a promo for Bridges of Madison County I don’t know about the movie, but the promo was slow, boring and had “chick flick” written all over it.
At a particularly dramatic moment, my friend, in his best Beavis voice, called out "this sucks Butthead, change it!"
Between this, and the drive-in "guys in kilts, audience participation mooning" incident, I was involved in disrupting two different showings of that movie.These were from my then-boyfriend-now-husband back in college, during free promotional showings at the local just-off-campus theater.
Shocker - Earlier in the film, some obviously very dead body is checked for a pulse by the cops. Later on, someone dies on camera in a deeply violent and dramatic fashion; IIRC the guy’s throat might have even been torn out or something very blatant like that. There is a dramatic pause, and my husband calls out, “Check his pulse!” Instant laughter throughout the theater.
White Palace - James Spader and Susan Sarandon have their big, energetic love scene. After the finish, the camera shows a still-perfectly-coiffed Spader, and my husband yells out, “And his hair is still in place!” This also got laughter - it’s more one of those “you had to be there” things, but check the movie poster in the link to see his hair. It was just so blatant in context; his hair hadn’t budged, in contrast to how passionate they were supposed to be.
In one of the Star Trek movies (IV, maybe?), there was a scene that involved whales making their, er, whale-sounds, which sounded as if maybe the whales had chowed down on some very large burritos about an hour earlier. This resulted in my saying, “Pardon” in a very low whale voice several times on their behalf. I could tell my date wanted to be outraged at me but she couldn’t stop laughing.
RR
They played the THX sound and the screen displayed:
The Audience is Listening™
And from the back, someone said:
“The audience is DEAF!”
Related story:
Many years ago, one of the local “art houses” did a week-long 3-D festival. On this day, the double bill was the aforementioned film plus a gay porn called Heavy Equipment. During the latter movie, there’s a scene where the main character goes into a restroom at the beach. Naturally, there’s a big hole in the wall of his stall, and the other guy sticks his schlong through it. As the first guy reaches up and grabs it, my friend next to me yells out, “THANK YOU, THING!”. Not just laughter, but actual applause from the audience!
Pilot episode of that show Numb3rs that had David Krumnholtz and Rob Morrow in it. The David Krumholtz character (math whiz) has modeled some architect’s building on a computer and shows that it would be unstable in a crosswind.
Then says something akin to “We have to go interview the construction crew and examine the building and figure out how they departed from these plans in such a way as to produce that instability”
To which I said “Oh please. If the model shows it collapsing in a crosswind, the problem is in the design. If it’s not in your computer model, your computer model can’t show it falling, dammit!”
We didn’t order any more of them from Netflix.
The first time I saw the James Bond film Octopussy, I was with a group of friends, who were a little noisier than we should have been. An usher came in and sat down behind us, apparently trying to decide whether or not he should throw us out.
After Bond bags a babe, he comments on an octopus tattooed on her thigh. She smiles and says, “That’s my little octopussy!”
One of my friends quipped, “I’d like to see her big one!”
The usher was laughing too hard to be able to reprimand us.
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In college, the student union had a theater, which showed a lot of old movies. One night, they showed The War of the Worlds. (The one from the 1950s, where the Martians flew around in the swan-shaped ships.) In the finale, a ship crashes. A crowd of humans cautiously approach. A hatch opens. A Martian’s hand reaches out, twitches a bit, then falls to the ground. One of the humans says, “It’s dead!”
In the back row of the theater, someone said, “Jim!”, in a perfect DeForest Kelly voice. The whole theater cracked up.
In Superman Clark Kent looks around for a place to change into Superman; his eye catches on a telephone - which is a modern telepone on a pole, instead of the classic booth. He gives it a “not gonna happen” look.
Use :
[spoiler ]Like this[/spoiler ]
but without the spaces at the brackets.
During *Ghost *there’s that scene where Demi sees Patrick again, even though he’s dead, because a certain Ms Goldberg is channeling his spirit.
What we see on the screen is Demi and Patrick leaning in for a passionate kiss. But I couldn’t get past the set up - the medium is still there, Demi’s not really with Patrick -
“She’s gonna ‘make’ Whoopi!”
It got a laugh.
Oh good, I can get this one in first.
Ryan O’Neal starred in Love Story, whose iconic line was “love is never having to say you’re sorry.” After this he starred in What’s Up Doc? with Barbra Streisand. At the end she says to him
“Love is never having to say you’re sorry”
and he responds
“That’s the stupidest thing I ever heard.”
I just thought of one of the most impressive putdowns I have seen in quite a while. Last night. Oscars. Ben Stiller. Cracked up everybody with access to the show. My appreciation of Stiller has moved up a notch higher than after he had done an episode of Extras.
Oddly enough, I had a similar lifting of my opinion of Kate Winslet after her bit with Extras, not that I didn’t already appreciate her. She just kicked it up a notch there.
A friend of mine told me this story about when he and his friends (in high school) went to see Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan.
Khan’s followers have just put Ceti Eels into the ears of Chekov and Terrell. Khan stands glowering over them, as their screams abruptly cease. In that quiet moment, my friend’s friend shouted out, in a reasonable Ricardo Montalban accent: “Now you will buy Cordoba!”
In high school, some of my friends and I ended up watching Spaceballs because an unenlightened few had never seen it before. About halfway through, the dumb humor is starting to wear on us (especially obnoxious Mel Brooks and his obnoxious Yogurt) and a few of us are getting distracted, until the part when a statue gets dropped on John Candy’s foot, leaving him with a clown-sized, pancake-like, utterly fake injury.
Deadpan, and with all the earnestness of a child who has just discovered physical comedy, one friend pronounced, “It’s funny because it’s flat!”
(You probably had to be there.) We all utterly lost it for a while, soon the movie got to another good bit with Dark Helmet in it, and Spaceballs was saved.
I dunno how iconic it is, but I was sitting next to a buddy when the trailer for The Last Samurai came on and cracked him up by saying “Finally Cruise gets to be the tallest guy in the movie.”
My husband and I were watching one of a gazillion productions of A Christmas Carol on TV - the actual story, tho, not the hokey sit-com take-offs. It came to the dramatic scene after the third ghost shows Scrooge what’s in store, and ol’ Ebeneezer wakes up weeping beside his bed. The actor was really getting into the role, and I just had to intone: “I do believe in spooks. I do believe in spooks. I do, I do…”
It was one of my prouder moments.
At the end of The Two Towers, during Sam & Frodo’s heartfelt conversation ending with Frodo saying, “I’m glad you’re with me, Sam,” I said: “Oh, just kiss him already!” Everyone laughed.
The biggest inappropriate laugh I remember was during Ghost, when Demi Moore was tearfully recounting all the things that faux psychic Whoopie Goldberg knew about Sam: “She knew about the songs we sang, and she knew about the green underwear…” Suddenly, a toddler’s voice mimicked: “Green underwear!”
(Heh. Guess you had to be there.)
A long, long time ago when Easy Rider was the all-time countercultural masterpiece, at the scene where Dennis Hopper takes off his watch and flips it to the side of the road, a woman in the audience said “Oh, how blatant!”
The scene was trashed much more pithily when Albert brooks parodied it in Lost in America.