HIPPO! HIPPO! NOM-nom-nom! Newslink

[Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor]

Hippo eats Human. Human crawls of of the Belly Of The Beast, & LIVES!

http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2013/may/04/i-was-swallowed-by-a-hippo?CMP=twt_gu

I turned just in time to see Evans, who had been flung out of his boat, flying through the air. His boat, with his two clients still in it, had been lifted half out of the water on the back of the huge bull hippo.
I reached over to grab his outstretched hand but as our fingers were about to touch, I was engulfed in darkness. There was no transition at all, no sense of approaching danger. It was as if I had suddenly gone blind and deaf.

I was aware that my legs were surrounded by water, but my top half was almost dry. I seemed to be trapped in something slimy. There was a terrible, sulphurous smell, like rotten eggs, and a tremendous pressure against my chest. My arms were trapped but I managed to free one hand and felt around – my palm passed through the wiry bristles of the hippo’s snout. It was only then that I realised I was underwater, trapped up to my waist in his mouth.

Holy shit.

[Sunspace]

They do say that hippos are among the most dangerous of animals.

[Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor]

@Sunspace

They do say that hippos are among the most dangerous of animals.

And I know of somebody who can prove it!

[MEBuckner]

@Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor

And I know of somebody who can prove it!

Well, I dunno. I’m not really seriously arguing against the proposition that hippos are damned dangerous, but I think that as far as this specific case goes, you could argue that if a goddamned bear swallows you, you fucking well stay swallowed, and none of this giving interviews afterwards.

[fubbleskag]

Luckily, he knew first aid and was able to seal the wounds in my chest with the wrapper from a tray of snacks, which almost certainly stopped my lungs from collapsing and saved my life.

what. the. fuck.

[Earl_Snake-Hips_Tucker]

Sounds from the description that he was actually headfirst inside the hippo’s maw, with his legs outside. A far cry from actually being swallowed, but a damned good escape, nonetheless.

[Senegoid]

I thought this was going to be about that police dog eating a hippo now.

That’s REALLY going to slow down the SDMB response time!