I am sick and fucking tired of those Hyundai commercials with the soulless, vapid girl ‘singing’ while some guy flails around the set with various props. I’m actually starting to feel sorry for the car.
It’s not you, it’s them.
Okay, I know we need rain but does it have to come down all at once?
It’s funnier if you read it as, “A picture of them with a baby.” Like, just some random baby.
I’ll join you in that one. This is our second winter in this house, and I am recognizing that some homeowners simply don’t shovel their walks AT ALL, all winter long. That is not an option here - I don’t care if you’re renting, someone has to shovel your fucking sidewalk, either you or the landlord - work it out between the two of you and get out there. And if you live on a corner, guess what - you’re responsible for BOTH sidewalks. God knows I’ve spent many an hour shovelling our 100 meters of corner sidewalk - it’s the price you pay for having only one neighbour.
One thing I’ve noticed about the un-shovelled sidewalks - about 90% of them have a snow shovel leaning against the house, mocking me. It’s not a decoration, guys - get at it.
No shit, huh? I mean, I know the rest of the country is having worse weather, but we just aren’t set up for dealing with stuff falling out of the sky!
Dear soap,
When I bought you two years ago you were creamy and smelt of lovely patchouli, I buy two bars of you last week and now you are scrubby and smell of onions, why did they have to change you? And you are the only thing I have to wash myself with over the Christmas holidays.
I don’t want to smell of onions. It’s not what I look for in a soap. Why do they have to change formulas of things that were perfectly fine before? 
Yesterday I had to contact someone at work (but in a different site) with a question/request. My boss wanted me to set up a videocon; I have no idea why do these people like videocons so much, but they do, it’s like “the company gave me this toy and by Jove I’m going to play”. But the someone was going on vacation, no time to set up anything, so I extracted the phone number from my boss and gave him a call (again, why the heck can’t you start with an email?).
Being polite despite all my years of schooling, I asked whether it was a good time, “middling”, “it’s about this, would you rather I send you the question by mail?”
Stunned silence.
“I mean by Lotus Notes! Not on paper, the only one who still uses paper is my diplodocus of a sister-in-law.”
Laughter “oh. Oh, yes, yes. That would be nice, thank you.”
One rolleyes to my boss because his ideas about how to contact someone and mine are complete opposites. One to my sister in law for insisting on asking for my physical address, which my mother then has to turn around and ask me for, in order to “surprise me” with a Christmas card featuring a picture of The Nephews in whatever costume she’s come up with this year (no more angels covering their parts with their hand, please). One to people who don’t know that e-mail is mail, and who get hereby filed in a sub-bin of the bin containing “oral sex isn’t sex” and “buttsex isn’t sex”. And one to me because half the office has gone on vacation already and I took a week at the beginning of the month (we had a workweek with two holidays) but I wanna go on vacation tooooooo!
Good for me. I get a rolleyes.
Because I don’t “know” that email is mail.
kaylasdad99, USPS.
Would you like it shipped by Correos or do you prefer MRW?
In Spanish the complete educated names are “correo” (for any method of shipment, including but not limited to Correos, personal messenger, messenger services, courier and email) and “correo electrónico”, which means email and is Just Too Long so you pretty much only hear it in political speeches (and then, generally by people who print emails before reading them). The unofficial name of correo electrónico is “emilio” (a pun on Emile/email), but this being a professional situation with a guy several paygrades above mine I couldn’t use that unless he did.
Oh, you’re talking about a conversation you were having in Spanish. Never mind, I guess.
Do I have to give back the rolleyes? I already took it out of the box…
Oh no, you can keep it. After all, e-mail does include “mail” in the word itself, and it’s an abbreviation of “electronic mail” - so my original observation that email is (a form of) mail stands. I promise it’s a polite rolleyes, though, it doesn’t roll under furniture.
I was going to post this, but I see you beat me to it. I’m sick of the friggin’ rain! Especially since my bro and his family are in town, and it started raining shortly before they landed here last week, and hasn’t let up since. My parents were planning to take them (and my kid) to Disneyland, but it looks like it’s not gonna happen now, because of the goddamn rain. :mad:
In other news, the oldest of my dogs is having trouble getting up lately, and yesterday my mom found her in the back yard, turning circles over and over in the rain, because she had forgotten where she was. We brought her in the kitchen and toweled her off, and she just lay there in a heap for the next couple hours. I know she’s not going to be around much longer, and she’s suffering, but I still feel guilty about putting her to sleep. I know that it would be the humane thing to do, however, because of her arthritis and her near-blindness, plus whatever mental deterioration seems to be happening to her (do dogs get dementia? 'Cause that’s what she seems to have, a canine version of dementia). It makes me so sad.
Two weeks ago on a Saturday we walked up the block to our favorite local diner for breakfast. The waitress (who told us on a previous visit she’s 81) comes to the table and begins to take our order. Right in the middle of my order she stops and says “wait a minute, I love this song” and then goes over to the kitchen and asks the cook to turn up the musak which up to that point had been pumping the annoying holiday tunes at a reasonable, easily ignored volume. What’s the song that is so beloved to this octogenarian that she had to stop doing her job to listen…
Alvin and the Chipmunks singing I have to freaking idea, some Christmas shit.
They turned it up really, really loud. She stood there at our table and listened intently while continuing to not take our order and proclaimed that Alvin and the Chipmunks “give her goose bumps” .
Seriously? You can’t make this shit up.
Oh and when she finally did take our order she got it wrong.
P. S. When Maria Carey sings Oh Holy Night I want to carve out her vocal cords with a dull knife.
Kathy.Lee. Gifford.
ugh.
oh…and people at other message boards that get offended by that…
Dogs do get dementia, and there are meds for it that have a reasonable success rate. If her other issues aren’t really affecting her quality of life (is she on anything for the arthritis?) then it may give her (and you) some more stress free time.
It’s so, so hard to watch them get old
Yeah, a brain can decline in function just like any other organ. The higher-level (read: smarter) an animal is, the further they have to go. And ohhh, it’s so hard to watch, and I feel for you, Not-So-Lucky-Right-Now. Maybe it’s because we live longer and a human decline is longer/slower, so watching something with a shorter lifespan like a dog, it’s like the whole thing is on fast-forward.
(But who the bloody hell gets offended at people not liking Kathy Lee Gifford?)
That’s not illegal? Around here, you have to shovel the public walkways around your property within 24 hours after the snow has fallen or you can be fined.
Yeah, you’re *really *going to want to specify that this is in Spanish. Because no one speaking American English (well, at least no native speaker) would say “mail” to mean “e-mail.”
raises hand Maybe I’m just lazy but I’ve regularly said in meetings “I’ll mail you a confirmation of that” and no one has ever thought I was planning to use Canada Post.