HO, HO, HO ! Santa Porn !

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

I went to buy a new, fake, Christmas tree yesterday. The fiber optic light up kind that we wanted was on sale at K-Mart.

So, we’re walking around looking at the Christmas decorations and we stop by those really obnoxious singing, animated figures, Santas, elves, bears, etc. My kids are happily pushing the buttons to make them all sing and dance and I hear my husband laughing his ass off.

“What’s so funny ?” I ask. He can’t stop laughing, so he just points.

Someone had arranged a Mrs. Clause on her knees in front of a standing Santa and when the buttons were pushed, Santa was swinging his hips back and forth, while Mrs. Clause was bobbing her head up and down. :eek:

Just take a minute to picture that.

2

As long as Santa doesn’t get snowballed… :smiley:

3

That is so… so… so wrong!

can’t stop laughing

4

There’s a blue balls joke in there somewhere…

5

I’ve got your North Pole right here, ho. :wink:

6

And you know he comes but once a year…

What?!? Someone had to say it!

7

If Santa’s been bad, who gets to put a lump of coal in his stocking?

8

“You better watch out, you better not cry. You better not pout, I’m telling you why. Santa Claus is coming…” :smiley:

9

Well, he does know who’s naughty and who’s nice.

10

Cue the Cheesy-70s-Porn-Groove Mix… Bow-chicka-wow-wow

11

Great, Cheesy-70s-Porn-Grove-Christmas-Carols.

Ick, my brain, make it stop.

12

Bwahahahaaaaa!!!

13

Mrs. Claus probably wants more jewellery. :smiley:

And now I know why the elves are that height. :eek:

14

Aagh. Another image I have to sandpaper off the inside of my brain. Oh, the curse of a visual imagination…

15

All I can say is that I literally “laughed out loud” how funny and wrong at the same time.

16

I don’t think anyone’s going to be able to top that one. Fantastic. :smiley: