We’re in the midst of the Holiday season at this point, and I was just curious as to how Dopers feel during the holidays. It’s a big time of the year for happiness and celebrating, but also a time when many people get depressed for various reasons.
For myself, I kind of bounce up and down throughout the season. Because of this, I try not to force myself to do things. For example, I make sure to do my holiday shopping when I’m on an upswing (otherwise everyone would just get a chia pet or a gift certificate or something).
As to why I ride up and down (more than usual) during this time of year, part of it I’m sure is that my family is pretty scattered throughout the country, so I usually end up at a friend’s for Christmas, which doesn’t bother me too much, but I do miss the gatherings we had when I was younger.
So how about you. Do the holidays make you happy or do they leave you feeling a little down?
Definitely down, thanks for asking. I still don’t know why. Maybe it’s one of those “the reality doesn’t match the hype” things, or perhaps it’s that the work of an adult over the holidays just isn’t the same as just enjoying the holidays, like when I was a kid.
My gift to my wife and kid is going to be an announcement that I can’t take this crap anymore. I’m skipping xmas next year and going to Hawaii instead. So there.
I have mixed feelings about the holidays. I’m down because once again, I have no one special to celebrate with. I’m down because I don’t really have the money to buy my friends and family gifts. I’m down because I have to work both Christmas and New Years.
I’m up because I have gotten some really great gifts so far. Opal got me a pretty blanket with animals on it, DRY sent me a porcelain hinged box from Limoges, France, and I got a puppy. I’m up because even though I have to work New Years, I am only working till midnight, and I might be able to find a party to go to afterall. I’m up because my friend Kerri invited me to have Christmas dinner with her family.
It’s been a long time since I’ve had someone special to share the season with. My dad, who died two years ago November, thought he was Santa. He always had a little gift, no matter who stopped by. (He also thought he was the Easter Bunny, and held Easter egg hunts for all of the neighbourhood children.) I’d spend every Christmas with him. But it was always just him and me, until the last few years of his life when my sister started coming up.
Okay, I know Christmas is about being with family. But My family ain’t that big. It’s my mom and my sister.
I want to have someone special with whom to share the holidays (and the rest of the year as well). There’s nothing like finding “the perfect gift” for the one you love. I usually spend some time with a friend, but it’s not the same as spending time with an SO.
So this year, I’ll pick my friend up at the airport. I’ll drive him up to see his mom. I’ll crash in the spare bedroom, then get up to watch the friend’s family share gifts. I’ll get a tin of home-made cookies out of the deal. As The Day approaches, I’ll see the various and sundry holiday programs on teevee. Oh, so heartwarming. The guy and the girl always get together at the end. Everyone is happy. Oh boy. All this togetherness serves as a reminder that other people are the ones who get to hold hands, kiss, make love, drink coffee together in their pyjamas, hit the slopes, and so on, and so forth.
I usually try very hard not to let people know all of this. But only a few of you have ever met me, so this is fairly anonymous. Outwardly I’m as jolly as the next person.
I do apologize if this brings anyone down. I’m just in one of my melancholy moods.
I do both… generally I’m happy but then I’ve done the exact same thing for every Christmas since my parents divorced and I’m not changing that just yet (It probably will change whenever I move out depending on where I go to University/College) I usually get down when I see all the lovey dovey stuff happening… and I really hate the cold so that gets me down just because its cold and I want to stay all warm and snug in bed. Usually I’m fairly happy though and enjoy things as they happen.
Johnny L.A, you do sound a little down. Maybe you could try what my SO did on his birthday a couple of years ago - he was having a crappy birthday, so he decided to forget about it and just go do something he really enjoyed (in his case it was spending the day at the Zoo). He has made it into a birthday tradition for himself; he even takes time off work to go to the Zoo. Hope this cheers you up a little
Normally I love the holiday season, however, this year I’m down for numerous reasons that all add up.
The main reason I’m down is it’s my first Christmas without my mother. She died in Feb. and I’m not over it yet. I’ve moved to another state to be near my remaining family, and I love it here in Phoenix, but I miss my friends something fierce (we used to spend holidays together). I can’t share my depression about my mother to my aunt because she is having a hard time dealing with it herself, and I feel I must be strong for her. To top it all off my SO got a new job (as a trucker!) and will more than likely be out of town on Christmas and my aunt is going out of town, so I’ll be alone.
I try not to notice the holiday spirit around me because I need to get past all of this, but it’s not always easy.
Definite blah here as well. Working too much lately, and haven’t even started shopping. Anticipating the standard family holiday angst, but may be spared this year. Plus nothing to do NYE yet. And I’ve been feeling really alone the last few months.
One thing I’ve missed the last five years at school was even slight knowledge that the holiday season was on. I always liked it when I was a kid, and just don’t even notice it coming any more.
This year is even worse, since I won’t head home until the 21st (after celebrating by 21st birthday on the 20th with two final exams, one in a class where I’m not doing so well). And my sister-in-law’s parents are visiting her and my brother for Christmas this year, so it will be my first Christmas ever without my brother around.
The big good thing will be getting to see my girlfriend on the 26th after she gets back from 4 months in Denmark, but even that will only be for a few hours, and then probably not for at least a month or so. And I still haven’t come up with a good gift for her.
Well, damn. I hadn’t thought about it much before, but now I’m definitely in blah mode.
“Down, down I come;
like glistering Phaethon,
Wanting the manage of unruly jades.”
–Richard II, Act 3, Scene iii
Definitely down. Bah.
I’m particularly unenamored of the first day of Christmas. But this year’s holiday in general looks to be a downer.
Only thing that has gone right is that my Christmas bonus was OK, and I really liked getting gifts for a few of my friends (Michi, among others, really and truly deserves far more than my feeble offerings). I really do like doing things for a friend.
Having more than two crummy days off would help, too.
It’s not fun any more. I don’t know when it became a chore. Even my daughter commented on what a pain it’s become. I’m tired of people asking me what I want - I feel like screaming: “If you don’t know me well enough to know what I like, why are you thinking of giving me anything??” I’m tired of my husband grouching about everything from the tree to the lights to where I’ve piled the wrapped packages. I’m not looking forward to my inlaws staying with us - they try so hard NOT to be a bother, it’s like walking on eggshells the whole time. I just want it all to go away.
Usually I love Christmas. The best part is going out to find the perfect gift for everyone. My brother once told me that I give gifts people didn’t realize they wanted until they got them. Kind of a cool compliment. So I have never been a Christmas hater- not one of Santa’s crazed elves, but I wasn’t a Scrooge, either.
So I was astounded when, while in the grocery store last week, I was singing along with the carols over the loudspeaker, but I had replaced the lyrics with different combinations of “blah, blah, blah” and “suck, suck, suck.”
I haven’t enjoyed the holidays since about 1980. I usually look at the pretty lights and enjoy everybody else’s fun.
This season, however, ranks among the worst.
Wallet (and all ID, credit cards, money, Disney tickets) stolen while shopping at Wal-Marts - the one time I actually was going shopping for Christmas presents.
Brand new car (a few months old) has been breaking down, but not the same problems to qualify for the lemon law.
New computer is freezing up on me.
Staff attrition and job changes/responsibilities have taken their toll on work morale (mine).
(former)Roommate decides he wants to be part of my life again, has made some changes, and wants me to ‘forgive and forget’. Problem there is, I am completely waffling on whether to or not.
Family is 1200 miles away, and giving me the guilt trip that “Gee, had we known you had a week off, we would have flown you home” while I had made a committment to house-sit for a friend while she was away.
While house-sitting, I will not have access to my e-mail or the boards (I am not driving an hour to work just to check to e-mail or the boards).
I have ugly bruises the size of Kansas that cropped up out of nowhere on my arms (and having to say to people “Really, (f)R did NOT hit or abuse me” - that is true.)
My medical bills from a recent auto accident [not my fault] are being rejected again and again by my insurance company (although my lawyer is doing his best).
And I still haven’t got the full feeling in the left side of my body from said accident.
And I look at people who are worse off than me, and feel worse for not appreciating what I do have.
Sorry this turned into a ‘pity me’ rant. It’s just how I feel right now. Thanks for listening.
I generally love Christmas day, but the holiday season makes me nuts. For one thing I’m next to broke because we had to get plane tickets just to be with our families, which means presents are going to be pretty sparse from our end. To add insult to injury, I’m a temp, so I don’t get paid for my week off which means when I get back, whatever presents I get will have to be sold so I can pay my rent.
But I haven’t seen my kids, or my parents, or my sister, or my niece and nephew or my in-laws since July. It’s going to be a whirlwind tour covering Vermont and Maine, but I can’t wait to see them all, minor dysfunctions aside.
The one moment I cannot wait for is after my kids have opened all their presents. So I can play with them.
