So as not to highjack the thread about having one’s choice of sexual preference…
Indoctrination, largely. The cultural/media/pop image is of some influence in this. I know a lot of guys who have a severe fear of being hit on, and, to me, that’s utterly nonsensical. If anything, it reflects their own insecurity, as if they are afraid, upon being propositioned, they would (involuntarily?) say yes!
I remember going to an erotic film festival. The audience exhibited the very commonplace double standard. Lesbian scenes? Cheering and applause. Gay scenes with two men? Booing, hissing, obscenities.
This is the culture I was brought up in…and I detest it. I hate that it settled deeply into my veins.
When I see two men kissing, my intellectual soul says, “Great! Civil rights! Cultural advance! Let us put aside the bronze-age prejudices and recognize the value of human diversity.”
But…my animal soul says, “Ew, Ick.”
My gay-rights voting record is impeccable. My activism is in the right place. I’ve carried signs in the local Pride Parade. (“I May Be Straight, But I’m Not Narrow!”) I have gay friends…
And, to my bitter internal shame, I’m not wholly comfortable with them.
Are open confessions like this good for society, or harmful? Would I be doing a better service to my gay friends and gay countrymen and gay humanity worldwide by not admitting to my failings? Or is honesty, even when unpleasant, part of the “Truth and Reconciliation” process?