Have you tested your blood sugar? I would get horrible nightmares that woke me up when my blood sugar was low.
A wide range of biological (as opposed to psychological) reasons can affect your dreams.
Maybe you should get a pet, like a dog or kitten.I think that playing with pets before sleeping and maybe even sleep with them on the bed could help you to feel relaxed and safe.
I live in a no-pet apartment building. That’s one I’ll keep on the back burner for someday when I live somewhere else, though.
This, however, does seem very much to be “asking for help and then rejecting it.”
If you’ve got a broken leg, why reject a splint or cast? If you’re in agony, why reject meds? It isn’t a moral failing.
Asking for advice, and then threatening to pit people who give it…that is a moral failing.
That’s something I’d thought of, having had three diabetic grandparents. I mentioned it to the doc, but part of why he said I should go to a psych is that my blood is fine. It doesn’t mean I don’t have anything physically wrong, but he didn’t see any reason to order any other tests until that stuff’s settled.
If the psych comes back and says this isn’t psychological, I’m probably going to be sent in for X-rays and scans of all kinds. Doc said if it’s causing nightmares this bad, anything physical would likely be pretty serious.
I hadn’t thought of that. Damn, why won’t Hollywood buy my (potential) PTSD? 
Rejecting help is one thing. I wouldn’t have called it “help”, but can we just agree to disagree? This is not the place to discuss my (or anyone’s) moral character, or anything of the sort. I came here to discuss options, not choices.
Even in the realm of professionals, not all help is created equal. How much more so on a message board!
I hope it’s abundantly clear that the reason I don’t want meds is not because I consider it a moral failing. I think they should be a last resort and I’m not in need of a last resort yet. I think sometimes they create even more problems. And I have had severely traumatic experiences with them- kapiche? Treating someone in any kind of psychological trouble with something that causes them considerable mental anguish is not something to be done on a whim.
I just want the darn thread kept reasonably on topic. That’s all. Moral failing or not, I have no desire to hear from her on the subject of meds.
I know why you don’t like meds, I read your other post. I find it more than a little alarming that you’ve internalized the mistaken belief that medication is bad, because a bad person used to give you medication. Have you considered that you haven’t been offered meds because you’re vocally anti-medication? I really, honestly, sincerely DO hope that you are capable of improving without needing it. But the fact is: that is not an option for everybody. Just because you may not *like *that fact doesn’t unfacticate it. Medication is, statistically speaking, EXTREMELY LIKELY to help you. But I’m realistic; whether or not you actually *accept my advice is not within my sphere of influence. *I’m still giving it, though, because I won’t be able to sleep well tonight if I don’t. Does this make you my pet project? I don’t think so. Does it make me overly empathic and a little pathetic (because who cares about strangers on the internet, amirite!?!??!?!)? Frankly, this makes my 3rd post in 2 of your threads. Not that many, compared to the number of posts made by others. I find it more likely that your dislike for my point-of-view is magnifying your perception of me as an antagonist.
I *would *ask a doctor to amputate a necrotic limb, or to give me a prosthetic if I was missing a limb (which is a better analogy for taking medication than amputation). Certainly, though, you don’t know me from Adam. You don’t owe me anything. But as long as you consider pharmacological intervention a last resort (as opposed to not considering it at all), then I’m happy. And you said that, so yay and stuff. Believe me: I am not belaboring under the misapprehension that my words are going to change your mind. Hence the frustration I described in my previous post. But this is a message board; words are all I have. And I never learned to be coy, so I’m not sorry if my directness offends you. You’re asking for help, and disregarding my help because you don’t like it (and now you’re castigating the messenger). How, exactly, does that indicate a flaw in me? Refusal to tell you exactly and only what you want to hear does not make me a bad person. This is a *public *message board. I am part of the public. You can put me on ignore if you like, but you cannot stop me from posting. I am giving you advice that works for millions of people around the world, because I sincerely believe you need it.
Perhaps the primary problem here is that you and I *both *tend toward bossiness, and are both thoroughly convinced of our convictions. I will sleep better tonight knowing I said what I had to, that’s all. And if you decide to Pit me, that’s okay. It’d probably be pretty boring without me, but please feel free (you’re part of the public, too).
Best of luck moving forward (and I’m not being the least bit ironic, here). I really mean that.
Sorry to hear about these issues Imago. I honestly don’t know whether this will help, but here it goes.
I had problems with nightmares when I was 5. Not unusual ones. But they bothered me. At the time I was irritated by the fact that I could actually be scared of something that was essentially invented in my own head. Lucid dreaming, which I came up with on my own (no big deal, lots of people have), helped. I would ask myself a couple of times a day whether I was dreaming, in order to get into the habit of asking myself that inside the dream itself. Once I recognized that I was in a scary dream, I typically handled it by flying away. I can do that. It’s a dream.
Now the dream will “Push back” usually. But arming myself with quasi-magical powers seems to take the edge off of the nightmares. Thankfully, I haven’t had problems with nightmares as an adult (or even when I was a teen). And I haven’t lucidly dreamed for a while. Adult dreamers may need a more diverse set of powers, I guess. Work them out while awake.
If you are interested, this message board has had a number of discussions in lucid dreaming (as well as a number of spammers on the subject). It’s a straightforward technique, so don’t shell out big bucks on this.
Somebody may wonder how I can possibly have such detailed memories of such a young age. I don’t. I have memories of having memories of that age, at least on this subject. I trust some of the narrative was constructed much later.
Fair enough, now please, can no one ever mention meds here again unless they can tell me something I don’t know? It would save me a lot of time.
I think I should note that I was’t threatening to Pit you (what kind of threat is that? “I’ll toss a sponge at you!” is more menacing). I was simply saying that 1) I don’t want an argument, dang it and 2) it was going to be hard to word it without getting my post moderated, because you’d managed to find and push my only major button.
It’s not as black and white as plain old internalized ick. I genuinely do believe, and probably would regardless of my background, that it should be an absolute last resort. That sometimes, medicating someone is a big mistake. What I’m trying to get across in pointing out the traumatic bit is that unless there’s a very good reason to, you don’t treat someone who isn’t comfortable in their own skin with stuff that’ll make them less so. I wouldn’t trust any doctor who believed otherwise to treat so much as a sniffle.
I’ve been outright told by two of the folks I listed that I’m more than capable of improving without medication. It could still be on the table down the road, but it’s not a choice between pills and unending misery (yet). So when someone comes in and tells me it is, of course I’m going to think they’re talking out their backside.
FWIW, I don’t think you’re a dick. That doesn’t mean I’ll shrivel up and croak if I don’t listen. So let’s all just be done with the fricking pill debate.
This is going to sound really stupid but it has worked for me. And I never really had nightmares as a child, they seem to have come on as an adult. When I wake up from a nightmare and can’t get back to sleep, I move my pillows to the end of the bed and lie down in that direction. No idea why, but it seems to help.
The kicker there is mostly that I’m already getting so little sleep. It probably still warrants checking out, but mostly here, I’m looking for ways to stop feeling so tense and get more rest in the meantime, because learning to lucid dream or to wake myself up or anything like that is going take quite a while, and so will working out the issues giving me nightmares to begin with. Even just getting back to sleep one night would make this whole struggle a lot less complicated.
Ah, you ninja’d me! This is worth a shot, at least until I’ve got some more reliable but less timely solution downpat.
I had horrible nightmares when I was younger. I eventually got over it via lucid dreaming. When I’d wake up from a nightmare, I’d play it over and over again in my brain, finding better endings for it so that I triumphed over whatever situation was getting me. I wouldn’t get up, I’d just lie there and think about it.
On days when I didn’t have a nightmare, I’d still spend some time thinking about and “replaying” my dreams when I first woke up. Some people find it helpful to write their dreams down, good or bad. But for me, it was enough to just “replay” the dreams with a better ending while I was in that state where you first wake up and are not really quite awake yet.
Once it was a habit, I found that I was able to start recognizing the dreams as they happened, and even though I was asleep, I was aware enough to think, “Oh, yeah, this again.” I would either wake myself up or just change the dream enough so it avoided the scary parts.
It took a while. But I’ve always had strong dreams even when they weren’t nightmares, so I’ve enjoyed dreaming at times too. Thinking over the dreams in the morning can be fun. I haven’t had nightmares in years because of this.
Amazon has all sorts of books about it. You should ask your therapist if s/he kows any that might help.
All I can say is, as Bill Clinton used to say, “I feel your pain”. (Google it if you’re too much of a whippersnapper to remember that) If I’m stressed, I get nightmares, too. I was running through a town I used to live in, trying and failing to get home, for a substantial part of the time I managed to sleep last night. Ugh.
For a while, I even figured out during that dream that I was dreaming, but I wasn’t able to wake up or change anything in the dream universe. Knowing that you’re dreaming is not some kind of panacea, at least not for everybody.
IANAPsychologist, but, given what you said in the other thread about your background, it would not surprise me at all if you did have PTSD. It would probably surprise me more if you didn’t.
Too much of a whippersnapper to catch that one; based on what Google tells me it’s a paleolithic precursor to “I hear you!”? 
Ooooh. That sounds like it sucks shit. It’s so much worse with insomnia, isn’t it?
Stress is quite possibly the only thing more fond of reproduction than humans, rabbits and microbes combined.
Oh, and don’t I know it! 
And most folks don’t seem to have a sense of touch in dreams. It’s hard to convince anyone I’m talking to that I can feel pain etc in them.
Yeah.
The skeptic act with the doc is mostly out of caution. Besides the startle response (which is a bitch) and nightmares, there are several other indicators I’d be a complete dunce to miss.
Though if I do have it, it’s gotten significantly better undiagnosed and untreated over the years, and not solely due to the passage of time. If anyone wants me to elaborate I will, otherwise I’ll refrain from boring ya to death.
My shrink prescribed Prazosin for my recurring nightmares associated with PTSD. She kept upping the dosage because the nightmares weren’t going away. She was aware and my pharmacy was aware that I was on another high blood pressure medicine (Losartan). Neither one of them told me that Prazosin is also a high blood pressure medicine. I wound up in the ER after fainting a couple of times and being incoherent with stroke like symptoms and extreme dehydration. My bp was 70/34. I could have died!!!
BE CAREFUL USING PRAZOSIN!!!
It sounds to me like you very much have PTSD. I have had nightmares on and off most of my life related to past trauma, and they got pretty nasty recently. My psychiatrist told me that you can’t really drug away PTSD (though it certainly helps with depression or anxiety.) The best thing I can recommend for you is prolonged exposure therapy. It will be the hardest thing you ever do, but it works. It has a very strong evidence base and resolved most of my symptoms in about three months (this is after I suffered over ten years.) You have to actually do it how it’s meant to be done, though. No screwing around.
ETA: I’m assuming you’re exhibiting other symptoms of PTSD outside of your sleeping that is prompting your doctors to suspect this is the problem. But it sounds like you’ve tried everything you’re willing to try, so it can’t hurt.
olives, I’m concerned that his docs think it’s PTSD but not doing any specific PTSD-related treatments.
Imago, you may have answered this already (and I know this thread is several months old), but are you getting exercise? I had one therapist tell me that running, walking, cross country skiing and the like mimic EMDR and so are particularly helpful for trauma. Plus, exercising helps you sleep.