How about another mini-rant thread?

The BBQ Pit
141

NOOOOOOOOOO!!!

I’m still traumatized from the first time I ever had to get glasses, back in the 80s, and all that was available was those glasses with the huge lenses (and generally ugly plastic frames, too). I hated how I looked in those, and it was so hard to find something that didn’t look like that. Please tell me those aren’t coming back.

(Oh well, if they are, at least my vision seems to have stabilized, so hopefully I won’t need to get new glasses until some decent-looking frames are back in style)

It’s the same kind of logic computer lusers use when they want a password (or something) changed. How dare you inconvenience me to verify that I am who I say I am. Oh, and you’d better make absolutely certain that there’s no possible way anyone could pretend to be me and get into my account, too.

I’d actually have been suspicious of an attempt at a social engineering scheme, in the situation LunaV was in. A person who had stolen a check might try to evade having the teller find out they weren’t the intended recipient of the check by making a scene when asked for ID, in hopes that the teller would just give them the money to get this unpleasant person to stop yelling at them and go away. But maybe I’ve gotten paranoid from reading too much about computer security.

142

This is what I thought at first; I first saw it in trendy magazines and coffeehouse posters, and thought it was just a silly trend. But it actually is better in one important way; it’s nice to be able to type phone numbers and times without having to use the shift key, though I admit that argument doesn’t hold up for the dates.

Sometimes when things change the new way actually is better.

I agree with you about the dates. Why can’t we all agree to write them the same way, month/day/year or day/month/year. I understand why we have our own sports in North America, particularly in the U.S. Our games are better! :smiley: Hah! a little joke. Seriously though, the date thing is just weird. Why do we Americans have to be different? Or does that include Canadians too?

143

By any chance, is the sarcastic use of “hello”-- meaning, "do you have a clue of what’s going on? " or “Get a clue!”, becoming more widespread? If so, I wonder if objections to answering the phone with “hello” are somehow related to that. It might sound vaguely insulting to some people.

144

Why can’t car manufacturers selling cars in the US pick a side, any side, for the gas cap to be on and, here’s the thing, have all cars have the gas cap on the same side? I hate when I rent a car and have to play “guess which side the gas cap is on”, because of course I didn’t think about that until I was actually thinking about, you know, getting gas.

If all cars did have the gas cap on the same side, gas stations could be better designed for a one-way flow of traffic past the pumps. And then nobody would be in the situation I find myself in way too often- you come into the gas station, and the only pump available would be easy to get to if your gas cap were on the other side, but noooo, it has to be on the wrong side…

145

Didn’t the warnings on the formula packages come about because of some massive lawsuit against Nestle Foods, who were accused of pushing formula to mothers in developing countries as being superior to breast milk? I think they were legally forced to put the disclaimer on their labels.

146

An Official Thing I Learned on The Dope: Next to the gas pump icon on your fuel gauge is a little arrow that shows which side the cap is on. I know! I never noticed it until it was pointed out to me. No more guessing for me!

147

That depends on how old the car is. Mine’s old and it doesn’t have that. Ford, though, puts the gas nozzle on the pump icon on the side the gas cap is on in your car.

148

True, but at least next time Anne Neville goes to rent a car, it will be The Dope to the rescue!

149

It’s not paranoid - it actually happens. I was a victim once myself, meaning I gave out money to the wrong person. Surprisingly (or maybe not so) he was a very friendly guy, joking and smiling with me. A client who gets loud over common procedures is suspicious. Now I’ve learned to be wary of those overly friendly ones too.
I’ve been in banking long enough to not get fazed by blustering clients who are offended at my attempts to verify their identity. Raise all the fuss you want, but it’s my job on the line, and you’re not worth it.

Yeah, we laughed. You’d be surprised at the lack of common sense some people have when it comes to banking.
“I can’t cash this check because it’s been illegally altered.”
“But all I did was add my name…!”

150

Why is it still so hard to buy a bra on the internet?!?! I bought a bra at a store, against all odds it actually fit nicely and looked good, so I wrote down the four-digit number that identifies the style and hit the internet. Well, apparently not one goddamned online retailer will come out and tell you what the four-digit number of any given bra is, instead you have to guess whether your Everyday Basic Seamless Soft Cup bra is the same as the Every Day Basic Seamless T-Shirt bra that looks just like it and look! it even comes in black, but is it the right bra? Because if it’s not, it’s going to have to comply with the bra rules of the universe and either not fit or look horrible, or both.
And I’ve been back to the store twice since then and they still haven’t had any more of them in any color in my size. Grrrrr.

151

So, if you’re going to yell insulting things at me about my weight, please make some sort of sense. Say I’m walking down the street to make some copies, and you, asshole, see me and can’t believe they’d allow something as fat as me in public, starting with a disgusted groan in a good start. I know where you stand on the issue of my appearance. But then to follow up by yelling repeatedly, “Stop eating so much pasta!” is just barely sensical. Yeah, I know Dr. Atkins taught us that carbs are bad and that clearly any fat ass out there is just eating way too many carbs, but why stick with pasta? Why start with pasta in the first place? If I were eating a bowl of pasta while walking down the street, then your advice to stop eating so much would at least make some sense. But I think, for economy’s sake, if you just yelled, “Stop eating so much,” and stopped there, you would be saving your breath and making more sense. But at least you were trying to give me some good advice about a healthy lifestyle, and I appreciate that. So much nicer than someone merely comparing me to Shamu or throwing glass bottles at my head.

On the flip side, asshole, if you actively like that they allow fat women like me to walk down the street, and maybe wish I were wearing fewer clothes, a whistle is a good start. I know where you stand on the issue of my appearance. Following it up with, “Don’t worry, baby, I like 'em big,” is kind of a jerk thing to do. Because, surprise surprise, I don’t think or worry about my weight much at all. I have a husband who loves me and thinks I’m sexy no matter what weight I am, and, frankly, I didn’t think much about my weight before I met him. There’s more important shit on my mind. And, surprise surprise, I am more than my appearance, and, further, my appearance is more than my weight.

So, I know, assholes, that when you look at me, all you see in my weight. You don’t even see my “such a pretty face” or my “such beautiful hair.” You certainly don’t see my accomplishments, my brains, my sense of humor, my compassion, or anything else that makes me human. And I don’t care if you think my weight’s a good thing or a bad thing. You’re sure as hell not gonna get in my pants, and you’re sure as hell not gonna stop me from walking down the street.

152

I don’t know about all American companies, but I know that you can’t count on any Canadian countries to write the numeric date the same way. If you have three different companies, chances are you will have three different ways of writing it. On the plus side, somebody has noticed this and is forcing all cheques to be standardized for date format now, so maybe it’ll trickle down and we can, once and for all, get a standardized date format for all numeric dates.

153

And just how many Canadian countries are there? :smiley:

One thing that puzzles me even more than the conflicting date formats is the difference in decimal notatation. In the US and Canada (and I think most other English speaking countries) we use a comma to separate thousands and a period as a decimal indicator – 1,857,321.85 for example. In most of the rest of the world, it would be 1.857.321,85.

How do these things happen, and why can’t we fix them?

154

Whoa! I’m definitely going to check my car for that when I go home today.

155

What’s that disease, where you compulsively pull out your own hair? Trichotillomania. I think I have that, only with my eyelashes. I constantly pick at them, looking for mascara clumps or loose or bent lashes, and it’s driving me crazy. It makes my eyelashes look bad, I can’t keep makeup on, and it gives me a headache. I don’t know why I can’t just leave them alone.

156

It’s exactly at this point I’d say, “Or you can come back when you’re ready. NEXT!”

I did that all the time when I worked in a deli. If you can’t be bothered with coherence, get the hell out of the way and make room for someone I might give a shit about.

157

Dear Lady on our Floor but Who Does Not Work in Our Office:

It’s eczema. I’m sure in this great big planet of ours there has got to be something, anything, that you could use to wash your scalp with. I am physically ill at your arrival everyday. Why? Because you come and stand in our breakroom to steal a cup of our coffee (it’s Starbuck’s, it’s not that great, but you can buy your own) picking your scalp and flicking the dead, yellow, dried bits of skin all over the floor. This is not done discreetly. No no no! You must examine each and every mountain of dry flaky skin chunck as if it somehow materalized out of nowhere into your hand. You just picked the fucker off your head, we saw you do it. We are horrified even more when you stand near the coffee machine to “shake” your top (must you always wear black? or dark green?) and fling your disgusting flakes all over the place before pouring yourself a cup of coffee.

Today was it. I admit, I waited until you left, but in front of our office manager, your best friend, I poured out the coffee pots declaring I would no longer keep my mouth shut. As your BFF says, it’s not her fault, she has a “condition” and can’t afford to go to the doctor for those fancy creams and lotions. You know what? Quit buying all that Avon shit you submerge yourself in every day and 1) you might cure your own “condition” or 2) you’ll have enough money for dem der fancy creams and lotions.

Excuse me while I go vomit. Again.

158

Yeah, I have that. It’s annoying as hell. I feel your pain!
(wait til you start getting grey hairs…)

159

No soup for you!

160

Why is it whenever someone on a message board is discussing a cultural icon, almost always an actor or author, they get this irresistible compulsion to refer to that person as Mr./Ms./Miss/Mrs. Soandso? Like you could be having this conversation about I dunno, let’s say Christopher Lee, and along comes someone who has to call him “Mr. Lee” like they’re working the front at the Four Seasons and the guy just walked in for his regular table. It’s this weird hybrid of familiarity and sudden servility that’s just vaguely slimy. Oh right over here, Mr. Lee, so nice to see you again. Haha, that’s a good one, Mr. Lee.

Mr. Go Fuck Yourself, that’s what. What is that, some attempt to play Masterpiece Theater host in the Cafe Society thread? “Well I’ve observed that Ms. Longoria has ahem enormous jugs and I for one blah blah…” Give it up, people doing that sound like that pretentious asswipe who hosts Inside the Actor’s Studio. If someone talked like that in real life I’d think they were fucking brain damaged.

Just saying.