Get married in city hall. Don’t invite anyone but the witnesses. Don’t say anything other than what the law requires, and I’m not sure than a civil ceremony requires anyone to say anything.
Invite all your friends to a party. Tell them you have an big announcement you’re going to make. After they arrive tell them you’re already married.
He might relent if he were good friends with the groom.
[/quote]
I’m assuming that you are referring to the woman that she wrote about rather than the writer of the article linked to (who is already married and would love to have Daddy offer to fund the party that she and her husband are planning.
If your parent or mate has never used their positions as seats of authority and been oppressive, intimidating, and demanding from the early stages of the development of your relationship, then I can understand why you cannot understand the sort of person who has to draw the line in the sand both symbolically and in practice. You may never have had to make a point of being empowered. That’s great! But lots of women do.
Just keep in mind that some parents, for example, use money to control their adult children. The children can become almost psychologically addicted to that extra income and the privileges that come with it.
The last wedding I went to, I was surprised when the minister was reading aloud the vows and the bride’s vows contained “and to obey.” That didn’t sound like either the bride or groom. I asked the bride about it on another occasion and found that the minister had slipped than in without checking with her.
At my wedding (under a small covered fishing pavillion over a frozen lake on New Year’s Day) the groom and I wrote our own vows. Sometimes we borrowed from song lyrics or poetry. Sometimes we used our own haiku. We used our real names and our User Names. Some of those present had known us only by the latter. The minister was one of them.
When he was writing his part of the ceremony, at one point he had said that the groom (calling him by name) had a mission in life and that my job was to support him in that mission.
Of course I would be supportive of my husband and he of me. But that was not my sole mission in life. And that part of the ceremony was reworded. But I just couldn’t believe that a minister could be so blind to reality in 1986.
Yes, wedding ceremonies can be oppressive. That’s true for both males and females.
Hmmm, seems pretty simple to me (but then most things do, according to MizRazor) – bride and groom should walk together up the aisle, present themselves before the officiant and announce their intention before all gathered thereunto their intention to love, honor and cherish each other, then invite everybody to stay for a drinkie.
I mean, seriously, is this all that difficult?