next spring I will be planting a garden and I was thinking wouldn’t it be nice to grow a flower that I can say “hey that flower is named after me” so how does one go about having my own variety of flower that is recognized by the official flower naming people
discover it. or create it
Or be loved or admired by someone who discovers or creates it.
Start buttering up botanists. Your best bet would be a botanist who’s about to go on an expedition to some place like the Amazon. If you could arrange to finance said expedition, even better. (Of course, you probably couldn’t plant your new namesake outside of a greenhouse.)
Dave, you can either discover or breed your own unique variety of plant/flower, patent it and name it whatever you want - “Dave316”, “New Jersey Princess”, “Festering Cheese Whiz” etc.
If you don’t want to go through the patenting process you can register newly hybridized varieties of certain plants through specialty plant societies (the American Gloxinia and Gesneriad Society does this, and you could contact the iris or daylily people or whatever to see about what the process entails).
After all, you’re not worried about making a million bucks, just achieving immortality, right? 
Be the First Lady.
or the queen of england
or a highly respected frenchman
I just found a little wild flower out back. I don’t know what it is but I named it dave316.
The best way is to hybridize your roses. You can name the resulting rose anything you like. It is really quite simple, although now is a bad time to start. I guarantee that anyone with a little smarts and time can do it. To learn how to hybridize, visit here. I hope to see the “dave316” at the next rose show I attend. Good luck!