How come my farts smell OK and yours don't?

Factual Questions
41

I’ve often wondered, because you don’t mind your own wind but you don’t like someone elses, so what if you and the other person were in the same room and you both farted at the same time and unbeknown to both of you the wind carried both farts, and as a result you both ended up sniffing the other persons? Would you like it or somehow know.
So, that got me thinking about how to run this scientifically.
what we need is:
2 people with imminent wind
2 pipes - either the hose off a vacuum the vent tube off a tumble dryer
2 blindfolds

Then, we need both blindfolded parties to fart at the same time into one end of each tube, whilst the other end is placed either in front of the face of the person who just farted into that tube, or vice versa. And the results observed. Then we’ll know if it’s all in the head or if it’s a physical difference in the gaseous makeup.

The test would probably work better if there were say 4 people and 4 tubes, to mix it up a bit.

Any volunteers?

42

Okay, I have to jump in, dignity be damned. Thank God there’s only one member of SDMB who knows me in real life, but that one is bad enough, as he’s my wife’s cousin.

Mrs. Cretin and I are in our 60’s, and have been married for over 40 years. There have been times when we were driving together, I passed gas, it stank, and I did the gentlemanly, honorable thing: rolled up the windows and locked them, then pretended to innocently not understand why Mrs. C. was gasping and cursing for many long seconds before I relented and unlocked the windows.

In my defense I can only plead Guilty With Explanation – I’m a human man, I got hormones in my body.

So…
just a few months ago we were driving down the highway, when nature whispered. The windows were already up (the weather was cold), but not locked. I let loose. The product was hot, silent but deadly. It was an eleven+, the kind that can curl wallpaper. The smell was genuinely horrible and thick, but we all kind of like our own, no matter what, so I’m thinking “this is great!”

At first I figured we’d play the game the usual way: After a few moments she’d detect my indiscretion, say “aagh”, try to roll the window down, I’d play dumb and then unlock the windows. Game over, well played.
But she fooled me. She kept quiet, didn’t react in any way. Okay, she’s toughing it out. I switch to Game Plan B: I’ll turn to her and say “Did you FART?”, she’ll squawk in outrage, I’ll unlock the windows, silently admiring her fortitude and good sportsmanship

So I say it. “Geez, did you FART?”
And the woman I love turns to me, smiles, and says “Yep!”

And INSTANTLY the smell changed from “funny” to disgusting. I couldn’t roll the window down fast enough. I mean it was really gross. And once Mrs.C realized what was going on, she reacted the same way.

So there you have it. We simultaneously passed hot, silent but deadly wind; we both thought the resulting aroma was diabolically funny; but the moment we realized that half of what we were breathing was someone else’s, the stench was disgusting.

Scientific proof of I don’t know what.

Oh yeah- possibly TMI.

43

I spend over 2 hours a day in my car. I also have a productive intestinal tract (of the “did something crawl up my arse and die” variety).

There is definitely an old fart smell in the car (if the air freshener runs out), even if I ain’t tootin’.

Si

44

One smart fellow, he felt smart
Two smart fellows, they felt smart
Three smart fellows, they all felt smart.

Say as fast as you can, repetitively if necessary.

45

I was thinking something similar, except you could actually make a more interesting study out of it I think. What we need is a devise for capturing farts, and they had made one on an episode of Myth Busters, so it shouldn’t be too difficult.

What we do is capture the farts of several individuals and “share” those smells among each of them at a time when they don’t need to fart. If there is any chemical aspect to it, they ought to be able to identify their own farts over others at a rate higher than chance.

Then you see how much affect the actual act of farting has on it with this method, except there is a chance of smelling someone else’s fart. If the act of farting is the cause, they ought to see a significant increase in identifying the farts of others as their own over the previous test.

46

You know how when you’re watching these nature shows and some zebra mare out on the Serenghetti has a foal and immediately they nuzzle up to each other, become familiar with each other’s scent and essentially pair up? Well, I figure it’s kinda like that. You in a room and some strange fart tries to nuzzle up to you and you’re like “Hey, get away, you’re not my zebra!”

47

I reject the OP’s premise.
My farts smell fine. It’s yours that stink.

48

I’m sensing a new SDMB meme.

49

I always presumed that this–uhhh–“preference” was imprinted in infancy. Basically the pleasant relief felt by an infant after unloading into his/her diaper is associated with the smell. It’s the rare parent who can dispose of every poopy diaper within moments of the event, so the child then spends more time getting acclimated to his/her own odor rather than just the general fecal smell.

50

Ever see on those documentaries when a baby gets rejected by its mother and is cast out to starve to death? That’s what you’re doing to my farts. You monster.

51

Ever see on those documentaries when a baby gets rejected by its mother and is cast out to starve to death? That’s what you’re doing to my farts. You monster.

52

So many wonderful questions in here, I think I’ll add one. Let’s take a case of a guy with faulty short term memory. He farts, then forgets he farted; would it stink or would he know it’s his?

53

It would stink. After my inadvertent experiment in the car, I think it’s psychological.

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