That’s a good question! What are those all about? Too bad that’s not what the thread’s about. 
The thing is, I’m sure there is a why, I just don’t know what it is.
I have a good friend was was an out and proud lesbian, from the soles of her comfortable shoes to the top of her boyish haircut - (imagine a shorter Rachel Maddow). She had a “See you in August” bumper sticker on her car.
She got married to a man a few years back. When she called to tell me, I said “Eva, I thought you were gay!” to which she replied “So did I!”
I once had an identical conversation (down to the answer) with someone I knew in college. (She wasn’t, however, a particularly close friend, and as soon as I said it, I felt awful for being so inappropriate.)
It really does seem to me that women’s sexuality is more fluid than men’s. I have known a number of women who have identified as lesbian who eventually entered into relationships with men, but no men who have done similar. I think part of it may be sociocultural, but I don’t know how much. I have spent a lot of time in very gay-friendly places (I did my undergrad, where I had the above conversation, in Santa Cruz, CA, which is VERY left-wing and lesbian-friendly, in particular), so I don’t know how much pressure there was for this particular person to start dating a guy. Hell, in Santa Cruz, I always felt like an outcast for not being a bisexual vegan with a lip-piercing and a “Free Leonard Peltier” button. (Sadly, am just a regular straight, liberal, vegetarian…practically a Republican by Santa Cruz standards.)
It is an interesting question.
I worked as a consultant for Eva at two different companies and stayed in her guest bedroom, so we were together pretty much every waking hour. She was so assuredly gay that my wife was fine with my living for months at a stretch with her.
I was honestly shocked.
I can believe that. As far as I know, every single one of the women I have been in a long-term relationship with have identified as bisexual.
I know personally several girls who change their orientation nearly every month. There’s one girl I know who went through high school as lesbian and now she’s dating a guy. Now she’s in-your-face about how straight she is.
There was another girl who wouldn’t shut up about how much she loved some guy, now she’s in-your-face lesbian.
I think that has more to do with teenage girls than gays, though. Or rather, teenagers in general.
Are all these anecdotes supposed to equal data? I’m not they prove much.
Probably not. But this forum is called “Mundane Pointless Stuff I Must Share”, not “Let Me Show You This Scientific Data I Compiled”. It’s an interesting thing to think about.
Fair enough - I guess I’m just a bit :dubious: of some of the extrapolating people are doing here based on their personal experience of one person, and pooling those together doesn’t necessarily lead to a more accurate picture.
But yeah, this is MPSIMS, not GQ so it’s not like we need to be that rigourous in our conclusion drawing. 
The OP chiming in again:
Yes, I was very tempted to post in GQ but better sense told me that the likelihood of getting anything close to factual data is about nil. Might as well fish for some anecdotes in MPSIMS.
Actually, I was almost expecting to get reply’s like, “have you been living in a cave, it happens all the time” and stuff like that. I’m almost surprised as to how few anecdotal incidents have been posted. I personally am aware of lots of cases of guys coming out of the closet to live a gay lifestyle but am not aware of a reverse “coming out”. I know a number of women who are lesbians and adopted that lifestyle after having children in a broken marriage. I’m not surprised at the commonality of the “LUG” syndrome. The concept that female sexuality is more “fluid” does seem to have some merit. However, that’s a bit different that what I was fishing around for in the OP. In the same sense, guys that have experimented or have been isolated (in all-male schools, the military or prison) are not really a part of the intent of the OP.
I didn’t want this to evolve into a debate on the essence of homosexuality. That debate will continue on forever. Nonetheless, JR Brown’s observation of “kin selection” is interesting. It used to be common when families were larger for one female to stay unmarried in order to take care of the parents as they grew older. I have no idea if those unmarried women were mostly lesbians. However, that would introduce the element of an evolutionary reason for homosexuality.
Anyway, thanks for the contributions and carry on . . .
When you need your parents’ permission to get married, and/or getting married / staying single / becoming a nun is your duty to those same parents, nobody gives a flying fuck who you want to fuck.
Ancient history was written pretty much exclusively by men. Sexual mores and expectations in ancient societies were determined pretty much exclusively by men. The idea that women could have a functional relationship with no men in it didn’t even have a toehold in ancient Rome, ancient Greece or medieval Japan. For much of Greek and Roman history women weren’t even recognized as capable of becoming actual adults.
Incidentally, as I mentioned above, the kin selection therory of homosexuality is quite weakly supported and probably not a good bet. Also, the current data suggests that male and female homosexuality may have a different set of genetic components.
The current strongest theory (still fairly weak) is that male homosexuality, and possibly male bisexuality, is associated with enhanced fertility in female relatives irrespective of providing childcare. So it may “merely” be a side effect of selection for something else. Depending on which studies you read, lesbianism and female bisexuality may or may not be influenced by whatever is driving this effect (an X-linked locus has been proposed as a major component, but not all the data agrees with this).
Ditto. With my generation (24), I bet at least 50% of women have had sex with another woman. It’s almost expected nowadays. It’s definitely not a porn fantasy.
And yet I very much doubt that the figure would be as high for men (if it is that high at all). I wonder why the difference.
I seriously doubt that the figure is as high as portrayed. And the comment “It is expected.” makes me shudder.
And I want to say to SanVito, I kind of feel bad for her experiences. It seems something a bit rude to do to someone.
And for the nth time, I am female.
Yay for more anecdotal evidence- but I know a bunch of bisexual women. I don’t know a single bisexual guy.
Edit: That I know of, of course.
If your first sentence is true it is hard to know how you could reliably be able to assert as you do in your second. Plus I very much doubt your second sentence. Women today have a huge say in sexual mores and expectations and I suspect they always have.
According to men, sure. Sadly, we don’t have the recorded opinions of 50% of the population, so to sweepingly suggest that lesbianism was regarded as just titillation for men cannot possibly be verified.
Perhaps we could consult Sappho on the subject.
OK, fine. Lesbianism was regarded by the male lawmakers and leaders who shaped the culture and by the male authors and artists who left 90% of the existing documentation from the ancient cultures under discussion (Greece, Rome, Japan) as something that existed primarily for the titillation of men; anyone want to challenge that? I don’t see why I have to spell this out in so much detail, it’s not like any of these cultures were noted for their progressive feminist outlook and validation of the female experience. :rolleyes:
And Princhester, I sincerely doubt it. Women in most pre-modern societies (and some modern societies, sadly) get to enforce the rules made by the men. “Correct” female behavior is generally so strongly inculcated that most of this enforcement is voluntary and with considerable personal investment, but the fact that women embrace the rules doesn’t mean that they make the rules.
JR you’ve already asserted you don’t know the true history since it was all written by men, so you have already rebutted your own ability to talk about what happened in the past. You can’t have it both ways.
Secondly, to paraphrase some wit (if anyone knows the source I’d be grateful): “In marriage, men make all the important decisions like what brand of car you should buy, whether the current government are great people or idiots and which football team the family supports. Women just make decisions about the trivialities, like where you live, who you socialise with, what you eat and how your children are brought up.”
Further, societal rules are made by consensus, not pronouncement. It is a breathtaking copout to say “I don’t make the rules I just thoroughly embrace them”.