How dark can you go?

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

I freely admit to stealing the idea for this thread from Hombre, but regardless of what he/she’s looking for, lets see how ‘dark’ we can go.
Big H’s example, “My future’s so bright …I gotta wear shades.” (ZZ Top?) - so…
He’s/she’s/I’m so dark…_____.

Unfortunatly I don’t have a good one to start us off (in fact they are downright bad!). But given all the funny responses to the ‘My Dick Is So Big…’ thread, I though some of you out there might could make it work.

He’s so dark, he makes Hitler look like the Easter Bunny.
She’s so dark, photons carry flashlights around her.

Sorry, I told you they were bad…
Next?

2

Warning! Bad pun coming up.

He’s so dark, black holes are brighter.
Hey! I told you it was bad!

3

That is so powerfully uncool to associate ZZ-Top with that song. It was Timbuk 3’s song The Future’s So Bright, I Gotta Wear Shades. Gibbons, Hill and Beard would be spinning in their graves… if they were dead.

4

ZZ Top -did- do a song called “Cheap Sunglasses”, but that’s something else altoghether.