damn kids these days have no respect for the classics
Tell them, “Tu stultus es.” *
Or, perhaps, “Catapultam habeo. Nisi pecuniam omnem mihi dabis, ad caput tuum saxum immane mittam.” **
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- “You are stupid”, the original motto of The Onion.
** - “I have a catapult. Give me all your money, or I will fling an enormous rock at your head.” One of my favorite quotes from the book “Latin For All Occasions”.
- “You are stupid”, the original motto of The Onion.
Ask 'em if they can understand their doctor’s instructions on their meds. Wouldn’t they like to?
Tell them, it’s too bad they don’t speak Latin, 'cuz there’s this wicked dirty pun/joke in the Roman Catholic Vulgate Bible that you’ll try to translate for them but they may not get, but you’ll try anyway, (look pensive for a few seconds). Nah, it won’t work, it loses so much in the translation.
Tell them that “Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet” they see printed on stuff is NOT a “place holder for text”. It’s the Ilumnati Manifesto.
Ave atque vale!
Easy: don’t major in Latin.
Why not just ignore them?
When they ask, tell them you majored in Go Fuck Yourself Studies, with a concentration in Suck My Dick.
Flaunt before them all the riches you have gained as a result of your studies!
Be prepared with the awesome and highly paid list of jobs a B.A. in Latin opens the door to.
“Unfortunately underwater basket weaving just wasn’t available at my school”
I’d go the other way: don’t try to justify it as practical. Just get a glow in your face and say “I love Latin. It’s amazing,” and then start talking and talking and talking about whatever it is that makes you love it (I assume you love it? If you don’t love it like caramel-covered crack, don’t major in it).
I find that people don’t know how to respond to genuine enthusiasm.
ETA: I have a better way to say that. I find most people are reluctant to be out and out dicks in the face of genuine enthusiasm.
This. I’m pretty sure you could learn it without majoring it.
Seriously, what kind of a job do you get with that major? (I’m not sassing you.)
Tell them it’s a hobby, not a vocation.
Think of all the respect you’ll get from dead Romans.
What are they majoring in that’s so awesome? I took a year of Latin to cap off my music degree, and there’s so many people who want to take pot shots at me. Mostly kids who took business. Because of course, taking a degree in a business and working as an assistant paper pusher for the government bureaucracy is the pinnacle of human existence. You got me beat! :rolleyes:
Nothing you can say will appease those low brow chattle, so don’t even try!
Teach Latin
Go to professional school (law, medical, business)
Go to graduate school (classics, history, social sciences)
And those are if you know nothing else. There are also jobs in fields like tech writing, human resources, civil service, client services, and sales where having a college degree is essential and having a college degree with experience writing/speaking/thinking is preferable. What is common in those sorts of jobs is that the college degree gives you a slight edge for the entry level position, but it becomes essential when trying to move up through the company as management-level job descriptions will require a degree, any degree.
ETA: There’s also the fact that four years of highly disciplined study in a complex and analytical field will make you smarter. Being smarter will make you better at whatever job you do end up in, and more likely to be noticed and promoted.
I would assume, though, the teaching Latin part isn’t really the best opportunity. I don’t know many schools that offer that. Second, wouldn’t all the Latin majors be fighting over it? As opposed to say being a math teacher which is usually in demand.
“I cried because I’d majored in Latin, until I met a man who’d majored in Art.”
The demand is lower, but so is the supply: there are a lot more math majors out there than Latin majors. In fact, the number of people that can teach highly advanced Latin is vanishingly small, and they are in pretty high demand.
I mean, if a life of teaching Latin would make you 100 times happier than a life of teaching math, but teaching Math would get you a job one year sooner, it seems obvious to go for the Latin. In the big scheme of things, having to work a McJob for a little longer until you find the thing you really want seems trivial compared to a lifetime of satisfaction instead of a lifetime of bitter resignation.
If being a highly attractive candidate is that important, there are plenty of ways to beef up your resume besides committing to a lifetime of doing something you don’t really like.
Another sneak-bragging thread.
Or just say “oh, I love Latin, I find it fascinating…how 'bout those Yankees” and turn the subject. Honestly, listening to someone else rave about someone you don’t find interesting is dull. And people aren’t mocking you because they find Latin fascinating.
If you are lucky enough to not need to major in something practical in order to support yourself, this is a good time to respond with a jab back…“well, I have this trust fund. I’m lucky enough to be able to major in a subject I love and not really have to worry about being employable when its done. The trust fund will get me through grad school easily - and then I hope to teach, but if I don’t, they money will still keep a roof over my head and feed me.” I’ve known several people in that situation
Manda Jo is right, there are lots of jobs for which a general liberal arts degree is sufficient. But its a slower start than a related degree - and in a tough job market hiring a just graduated from college sales person with a business degree is going to be more attractive than a few years ago when you hired a sales person with a liberal arts degree and trained them because there were more jobs than candidates.