I’ve known a few artists in my time – not many, but certainly a few – and all of them seemed to be obsessed with sexual imagery. I can’t say whether that was actually intended to be a painting of a dong or not, but if it wasn’t, and just turned out that way by coincidence, then the artist should turn in his badge and go back to being an accountant! 
This!
I love this whole thread. I have this same stream of stuff running through my head and keeping me up at night. I also like Leaper’s link to the cartoon, and I saved it and keep admiring it, and just noticed in the middle panel of the third row that there’s a pedestrian she appears to have hit without noticing. This whole subject is rich and keeps on giving.
The way I understand your “Well, if you’d just be different” is that this seems to bother some people and not others, but it’s not as if those of us who beat ourselves up are making a choice to do so. I know how to switch cell phone providers or start storing bread in the refrigerator, if it seems like a good idea. I don’t know how to replace beating myself up with something more productive. Not to fail to appreciate AnaMen’s response, but, how exactly do we stop?
About yesterday’s gaffe – I looked at the painting and thought, “Now, where’s the dong, is it this bit here, is it over here… WHOA! The whole damn thing’s a dong! How can they even hang this painting? This looks like a spraypainted subway car!” Now I cannot possibly look at the painting and not see dong. If it matters, I’m a man.
So!
I am really enjoying the company here. I have worried about why I keep playing the “You too!” comment to the server over and over in my head, and all the other similar things, and also beaten myself up over beating myself up. I still don’t know why I do it, but now am thinking there’s nothing abnormal or deficient about me for doing so.
For what it’s worth, I bless all the things everybody has said and beaten themselves up for!
Step 1: Identify what went wrong
Step 2: Think about why it happened
Step 3: Figure out what, if anything, should be done to ameliorate the situation
Step 4: Contemplate how to avoid similar situations in the future
Step 5: Execute any actions dictated by Step 3
Step 6: Consider what you have learned. Learning is good. Move on, armed with new knowledge.
Step 7: If you keep beating yourself up, remind yourself that you’ve already done everything possible, and go do something nice for someone.
Well, that doesn’t stop it for all of us.
Do something worse and focus on that. 
I am the queen of foot-in-mouth, which is partially why I go back and forth from being socially exuberant to wallflower every couple of years. I’d share a few doozies, but I don’t want to think of them long enough to type them out!
My technique for stopping the annoying pop-ups of embarrassment is to hum a snippet of song loudly (usually in my head, heh) to block out the thought and quickly think of/do something else. It actually works. What song? Usually the National Anthem or Row Your Boat, nothing that cross-association will taint too badly. 
FWIW, I don’t think the dong painting comment ranks really high on the scale of embarrassment. That’s one Rorshach of a painting!
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!
Coming onto thread a bit late, as is rather my wont – I’m a heck of a one for beating self up for self-perceived social /conversational bricks dropped by self, for anything between 50 / 60 years ago, and a few months ago. The best consolation which I find is – as affirmed by various PPs – most people are far more interested in themselves and their doings, than in random crap said or done by random people whom they encountered in the past – which stuff they speedily forget. Many remembered things by me which gut-wise, I still squirm and cringe about; I realise head-wise, are very probably now remembered by only me, out of all the world’s population. Plus: a kind of bleak consolation for folk such as me, in the latter half of our sixties – many (and increasingly many, as the years go by) potential remembers / ridiculers, have taken the one-way journey off planet Earth…
We seem to have several unconscious programmes running in our mind. Two of them seem to be:
- always focus on the negative/worst possible outcome (e.g., Life is beautifool. We don’t focus on the meaning, but on the misspelling)
- whatever happens, give it a meaning or I’ll do it for you (if you don’t do it, go to 1)
When you do something that is embarrassing, the best way to deal with it is to quickly give it a meaning. My all-purpose meaning is “Upps, that was embarrassing. Oh well, it’s gonna be a great seminar story!” (or message board story).
And in order to get rid of those flashbacks regarding past experiences, have a look at either Time Line Therapy or Emotional Freedom Technique. Both very simple and very effective. I usually can help people get rid of negative memories within a few minutes and then they can do it themselves for other memories. You could probably even learn these techniques from watching youtube videos. Good luck!
Step 1) Run over the incident over and over in my head
Step 2) Repeat Step 1 until asleep or distracted
I’ve come to assume that rumination is pretty normal although not very helpful. I’ve just finished 12 months of therapy as part of my treatment for serious depression. I knew I was a perfectionist but had no idea how I had a rigid set of personally appointed standards that I constantly measured myself against and berated myself over when I didn’t meet. Most of these are from childhood when I probably wasn’t any more dishonest or cowardly than any other child my age but I’ve spent perhaps 25 years emotionally flogging myself for them.
I’m doing much better now on that front. I heard a saying, “Depressives always look to the past, Anxious people always look to the future.” So, by doing to much of either, you’re never in the present living life.
You might find it helpful to take the most invasive thoughts, think about what outcome you’d have preferred to have occurred then plan the steps you’d have taken. Then you can apply it to any future instances where the theme is the same e.g being honest, standing up for yourself or others, taking someone else into consideration. Once you’ve worked out your plan on paper, you’ve also ‘dumped’ the issue on the page, used the experience to learn from and have a way of avoiding the same outcome in the future. It might work for you, it might not. But regardless, you’re normal