Nope, you’re not going to goad me into posting food porn, there might be children hacking this site.
So i am older than you, because DARE was developed after my time. It’s the “abstinence only” drug ed, and send about as effective as abstinence only sex ed. Most kids are eventually going to try mood-effecting drugs, even if it’s only coffee or a prescription pain pill. It seems wise to give them a little more information than “this will fry your brain”.
Anyway, back to the teacher: i think it’s highly likely that a few parents watched her onlyfans performance, and essentially all of the students in her school only heard about it, and didn’t see it.
What grade did she teach? Because if her students were old enough to be titillated by porn, i also bet a large fraction of them had already watched free porn online.
So i really doubt that her onlyfans activities introduced porn to any significant number of kids.
It has been put out here that we should respect people who are sex workers and appear in porn. I will put this out.
Suppose a teacher attempts to seduce one of the parents of one of her students. This parent is in a relationship with the other parent. Should the teacher be fired?
In my opinion, yes. What the teacher did is not illegal. Do I respect it? No, I don’t. I don’t respect that behavior. Someone who is a sex worker and appears in porn, I do believe, is attempting to seduce people for money. That is what it is. I do not have to respect it, particularly if I know the person.
Also, the burden of dealing with a teacher like this is a little different than dealing with a waitress or waiter or someone else on the job, where we can fairly easily move on to a different business. If the teacher makes their seduction attempt in November, and I otherwise like the school, and my child is in the third year of the six we plan to have them at the school… seems like kind of a high burden on the parents. So I am fine with teachers being fired for being disruptive with the parents in such a manner. Even though the children are not directly impacted, they are affected by having to switch schools. I do think teachers have a higher burden because of the nature of their jobs and these sorts of difficulties in “just going somewhere else.”
And yes, I do think porn is a seduction attempt.
Did the teacher do any of this at school, or otherwise use school resources to accomplish this goal (for example, emailing the dad with her school email, or finding his phone number in the school directory)? If so, then that is inappropriate and disciplinary measures are fine.
But if she like, met him at the gym they both go to, asked him to go for drinks after one night, and then slept with him? Why on Earth would she be fired for that? That seems strange to me.
And unless the teacher roofied the dad and had her way with him (which would be rape, so she should go to jail and yes, be fired), this isn’t something SHE did to HIM; it’s something THEY did together. If the husband’s actions mean the wife now wants to move away, the blame is far more on him than on the teacher. She didn’t make any vows to his wife, did she?
Anyways, I think there is a big difference between sleeping with the parent of a student, and posting images online. Like, a vast gulf.
If you don’t have respect for sex workers because you think they seduce people for money, that says a lot more about you than anyone else.
If she was a waitress, and she came onto him, even if he turned him down, the couple wouldn’t keep going back to the restaurant where she worked, would you? You don’t keep getting served by the same person who is already inserting themselves into your life. I don’t care if she came onto him (or she/her or whatever combination) in the restaurant or in the gym or somewhere else. You end the association.
With a school it’s a lot heavier burden and very costly for the parents to stop using the school because of a disruptive teacher. So teachers have a burden that doesn’t apply to other jobs. They are very public facing employees that have to be dealt with for weeks on end, months on end, every weekday.
So maybe the parents don’t have to stop using the school. She has an online sex presence for paying adults. I simply don’t see that as a “disruptive teacher.” Obviously, some here see it differently.
I don’t. The porn actors are almost certainly not available for you to have sex with. You can only watch them having sex with someone else (or by themselves).
Phone sex/video sex services are different. There the actor is interacting with you. But that’s a very different service.
WTF? So if someone came on to you at the gym, you would immediately skip town and change your name? That seems a little overly dramatic.
If a waitress came on to me, I would say “no thanks, I’m happily married” and then I’d order my food. I wouldn’t boycott that restaurant for the rest of my life because of it.
Now, if I had an affair with a waitress (something I would not do, just to be clear, but in this hypothetical), then my wife might very well not want me to go to that restaurant anymore. And that would be totally fair. Because of my actions, not the waitress’.
It is still seduction. “Come on OnlyFans and pay to see me have sex, you won’t be able to see that any other way.” That is the definition of seduction. The fact that there is no in-person interaction is irrelevant. The prostitute may have a LTR and may give a “limited menu” to his or her clients as a result. They are still trying to seduce their clients to take part in the sexual experience for money.
Of course, in this case the impersonal became personal when the teacher was outed. Now it is a real person that people are spanking off to, or tempted to spank off to, instead of Nobody from Nowheresville.
Everyone on the internet is actually a person that lives somewhere. Just because we think they don’t doesn’t make it so.
The role of porn in relationships differ by couple. Some use it, some don’t want to use it. But people here are breezing past the issue that actually knowing someone in the porn video is going to change relationships drastically.
So do you think if a sibling, or a parent, or a best friend, or a coworker, is in a porn video is “just the same” as someone we don’t know? That’s the problem with going down this road. No, I don’t think it’s the same. That’s why this woman hid her face in the first place. But someone else didn’t, and someone who knew her husband, who is on OnlyFans looking to spank away themselves, figures it out.
I don’t think we can or should normalize porn to the extent that we’re comfortable going out, spanking away to a sister in law’s porn video and having that have no impact on our existing relationships. We are just fooling ourselves there. And I will definitely stand up for the fact that porn is impacting existing relationships and I do not view it as harmless.
There is this thing that, if kids partake of it, is harmful. I don’t want kids partaking of it. I definitely don’t want teachers bringing it into school, or even talking about it at school. If a teacher helps my kid partake of it, whether it’s at school or otherwise, I’ll want the teacher to be criminally prosecuted; and if the teacher just talks about how great it is, they should be fired. But it’s legal, and if a teacher has a side gig in which they sell it to consenting adults of legal age but don’t talk to students about it, I honestly don’t much care: they’re allowed to do that.
I’m talking about beer, of course. What did you think I meant?
I’m wondering if folks who advocate firing the OF teacher also would fire a teacher with a bartender side gig, on the premise that it normalizes an activity that’s obviously harmful for children to engage in, or that kids who wouldn’t otherwise drink alcohol might be tempted to do so on learning that their teacher waits tables at a beer-serving restaurant.
Just quoting for truth. “Sex is less than, but also greater than, porn.”
I agree, obviously. If someone’s sister in law has an OnlyFans, it would be pretty creepy for them to subscribe to it, because they have a real life relationship with that person.
By that same token, if a parent finds out that their kids’ teacher has an OnlyFans, and decides to subscribe to it, that parent is a creep.
That’s on that person though, not on the person producing OnlyFans content.
Now, if your sister in law gives you stickers with a QR code that links to her OnlyFans, or if your kids’ teacher includes the link in her syllabus, then we have swung back around to those people being creeps and acting inappropriately (and in the teacher’s case a firing is due). But that’s not what happened in any of the cases being discussed.
If you hear that your kid’s teacher has an OnlyFans, you subscribe, you jerk off to it, and then you feel like your relationship with that teacher is strained - that’s entirely on you. Nonsense like “well I had no choice, I knew the sex content was out there and that knowledge seduced me against my will” is classic “slut shaming” behavior that strips agency from men and puts all the blame for the men’s behavior on the women.
No, it’s a definition, the one that you want to use, not the definition.
But the teacher didn’t disclose she was on OnlyFans. So someone she knows uses OnlyFans and figures out it’s her. How do you unsee that. “Only use OnlyFans for people you don’t know, but if people you do know are porn actors, they won’t tell you and you will just be surprised.”
So for at least one person they would have no way of knowing the teacher is on OnlyFans. Please find a way out of this problem. Teacher can’t disclose they are on OnlyFans, parents aren’t supposed to look at videos of teachers on OnlyFans. But they would have no way of knowing what videos to avoid, would they.
I’d be fine with nobody using OnlyFans either way. But given the lack of disclosure and the seeming impossibility of disclosure, it’s the teacher’s responsibility that she got outed.
I definitely do not think that masturbating to porn made by an anonymous stranger is the same as masturbating to pirn made by someone you know.
One is basically a way for someone to meet a biological need; the other is a way for someone to fantasize about sexual relations with someone they have a non-sexual relationship with.
Those are two very different acts.
Someone putting content on a site like OnlyFans is not inviting every person in their personal lives to partake, any more than a stripper at a club is inviting her father, principal, neighbor, uncle, and priest to line up for a lap dance.
If you find out that someone you personally know makes that sort of content, and you intentionally seek it out, that is creepy behavior on YOUR part, and YOU are the one who should be judged for it. Just like we would judge a man who puts on a fake mustache and goes to the strip club his wife’s sister dances at.
Now, if a stripper hands her brother in law coupons for 50% off lap dances, or an OnlyFans content creator links her page to her coworkers, that responsibility is back in their court.
Not implies; explicitly states.
In fact, it absolutely should end the debate. We should deal with the facts of what actually happened, not hypotheticals about fifth graders hacking OnlyFans and stumbling on their teacher’s porn.
The same way you’d deal with it if you walked into a strip club and saw that your sister in law was dancing there. You leave without getting a lap dance and then never mention it again.
Years ago a friend of mine asked me for a tattoo referral. I introduced her to a friend. I forgot all about it, then one day she sent me a text message with a JPEG attachment. The text of the message was “me right out of the shower”.
I did not open the JPEG. I wondered if she sent the message to me accidentally, if she was flirting, or what. Days, then weeks went by.
One day my gf told me she was talking to the woman and she asked if I’d showed her the picture of her permanent eyeliner tattoo. Yeah, the “right out of the shower” picture was a close up of her eyes.
I was proud of myself for never looking.
I like this analogy. It could even be better refined (or, well, fermented) to be about a teacher with a side gig as a craft brewer. If kids find out she brews and sells beer, will they be more tempted to try beer? Should she be fired? Please.