Thanks. for the record, I think this is the very first time I’ve ever had the rolleyes smiley thrown at me and felt that I deserved every bit of it. I welcome the smackdown.
That’s funny, because I was very hesitant to use it! Glad there are no hard feelings. 
(bolding mine)
Wait a minute. A free pass on irresponsible behavior? Since when do we prosecute people for being irresponsible? Quite frankly, I think a woman who does leave her child at a hospital or police station is being quite responsible under the circumstances. She’s realized she cannot properly care for the child and is leaving it in a place where it will be found and provided a good home.
Maybe I’m not understanding you, but are you suggesting we should bring back the scarlet letter a la Hester Prynne?
People do stupid things. It’s how they handle those things that indicates responsibility. The woman could have been raped or abandoned by her boyfriend or gotten pregnant from a one night stand. This way the baby gets taken care of and she’s not prosecuted for abandonment.
Could or should the mother be charged for support payments?
If I understand athelas this would be what he is getting at. If a mother can abdicate her responsibility to care and provide for a child with no penalty, why cant a father? If a mom runs off could a single dad hand over a baby?
A mother, even under Safe Haven laws, is just as financially responsible for the baby as any other parent. The “Safe Haven” is safety against prosecution for child abandonment, not against child support. If the city finds out who the mother is, she will be ordered to pay child support until the baby is legally placed for adoption.
So, yes, it’s identical to the situation with men - skip town, don’t let 'em know you’re the parent and you’re scot free. An asshole, but free. If they find out you’re the parent, you’re on the hook financially until adoption.
And yes, a single dad can also take advantage of the Safe Haven laws. There was a story in the news recently about a single dad who turned his baby girl into a hospital one day before her first birthday (the Safe Haven law only extends until the first birthday) because he could no longer care for her. Broke my heart to read about it - 11 months, 3 weeks and 6 days he grew to love that little girl, and then had to make that awful decision to hand her over. He fully cooperated with the hospital staff and state authorities, from what I understand.
Definitely. Spain doesn’t quite have these laws, but every case I remember hearing about where the mother was found, she was a chubby teen whose parents hadn’t realized she’d gone way beyond chubby. I vaguely remember one case where when the girl’s parents were told they started hitting her and lost custody of her as well as never meeting the grandkid.
Every time one kid is found in a dumpster or in a basket in a hospital’s parking lot there is some people asking that kids be given information about how to give a baby up for adoption. We have the country plastered with posters on using condoms (which don’t seem to be all that effective), why not leave a few square meters for “how to give up your baby in a legal and safe way”. But because this is seen as a “reactionary” position (hey, it’s a position by people who don’t think any unwanted pregnancy should be aborted), it dies away fast… until the next baby.
clarification on my post, sorry: it’s a position held by people who don’t think that “any and all unwanted pregnancy should be aborted”. I’ve seen a local pro-free-abortion politica get in trouble with her way-left party when she asked for safe haven laws and education on how to give up a baby; apparently “if you want to abort it you should be able to, if you want to keep it you should be able to and if you want to give it up you should be able to” is reactionary.
And clarification of my post: Safe Haven laws vary by state, so YMMV. Here are some links to various state statutes.
No, I meant that she would not have to shoulder the consequences of having a child. Which was what I meant when I later remarked that there was no “similar way for men to abdicate responsibility while society says ‘oh well, the alternative is worse.’” An irresponsible father does not have the option of dropping his responsibility as a father of a child; here, an irresponsible mother does.
Sure, but let’s remember that “under the circumstances” means, in the vast majority of cases, having unprotected sex (or poorly using contraception) while being unable to deal with the possible consequences of having a child. One may as well claim that, having not done his homework, a student was being quite responsible under the circumstances by owning up to his laziness and demanding an A regardless.
I do think we need more of a sense of shame in the US, but that’s quite another debate.
I would think that a disincentive to avail oneself of Safe Haven protection. I understand the reasoning, but I’m not sure it would be helpful.
I would really not like to see the news reports of the teen mother being hit up for support money after “anonymously” dropping off her baby.
Okay, athelas, I see your point. Unfortunately, a woman always knows who the mother of her child is, while the man may not always know who the father of his child is. It’s a built-in discrimination based on biology, but I can see where men are trapped into child support by women who swore “I’m on on the pill and it’s perfectly safe and I had a hysterectomy anyway.”
Bottom line, it’s what’s in the best interest of the baby. If the price of that is that someone gets away with abandoning a child, (who will probably get adopted into a loving home) I’ll live with that.
I agree with this statement.