List them. Not doubting you, just interested to see if they form a pattern.
- Croupier in a casino
- Manager of a mobil petrol station and convenience store
- Shift manager of sole charge Shell petrol Station (next to the beach) looked at pretty girls in bikinis in Summer
- Bar Man
- Shop Assistant
Here in Singapore I unfailingly get called Sir all the time in restaurants and shops
You’re from New Zealand aren’t you? When I lived there I didn’t notice anyone being called sir or ma’am regularly. And I certainly didn’t when I was working in customer service jobs (including service station and aircraft charter.)
Yep I’m a Kiwi.
Wow, Really? When were you there last?
I totally grew up around customer service (my father was a bar manager) and its normal for me. Anytime I wanted to address a specific person, if I didn’t know their name it would be sir. Perhaps part of the reason was that I was young, and many of the people I talked to were at least middle aged, so mate would have been inappropriate?
Maybe also I’m just weird and out of step (this wouldn’t be the first time)
Casinos always maintain an aura of class and that doesn’t suprise me. I can’t think that I’ve been “sirred” at a petrol station in my life, let alone one next to a beach and this surprises me. Bar man it wouldn’t surprise me at a posh place, but would at anywhere informal or local (unless you were dealing with a complaint or something where enforced politeness applies).
And Singapore is a whole other ball of wax.
The bar was a small local pub - even some of the regulars I would “sir” as they walked in, as a formal “welcome in tonight”
Note - I didn’t always use sir / maam, depending on mood and demeanor of customers - but certainly more often than not.
Also hotels upon checkin, banks (until they had my particulars) I would be Sirred
I’d agree with this from my own experience of living in New Zealand.
Just out of curiosity - Cunctator and Death Ray, which part of New Zealand were you living, and did you notice any regional variation at all?
I am kind of intrigued now - I always thought the country was pretty homogenous in such things. There is of course the possibility that my mind is playing tricks - it has been ten years since I’ve lived there.
I moved from Palmerston North to Dunedin when I was eight and lived there till I moved to Queenstown at age twenty. I moved to Wanaka shortly afterward then came over to Australia in 2000 when I was twenty six. So while I was old enough to notice, I was staying in the same part of the country. I vaguely recall being supposed to use customers names if we noted them on their bank card when I worked at a Mobil service station, but not many of us did it, and I don’t recall being asked to use sir and ma’am by management.
I don’t doubt your experience at all, there are definitely people who use sir and ma’am and obviously you’re one of them, but overall I feel it’s uncommon.
Edit: I don’t normally use mate, and definitely wouldn’t in a customer service position, but I find that using names or titles is generally not necessary at all. Most of the time it is obvious who you’re talking to.
Most Americans usually call their fathers “Dad” too. But often in responding to them, we will answer, “Yes, sir” or “No, sir.” With some of us, such courtesies are drilled into us by parents. If we answer a simple “Yes” to our mothers, often they will say “Yes what?” to remind us that we left off the “M’am.” In some areas, we also use “Sir” and “M’am” to anyone older or anyone we wish to show respect to.
It pleased me to use “Sir” with my father.
Wellington, but I did travel around the country a bit, and no, I didn’t notice much regional variation.
About my experience in NZ too – I’ve worked retail in a Garden Centre (as a kid) and in comic and games shops as an adult. OK, not too many “Sirs” and “Ma’am” in the comic or games shops – but I’d use it for anyone over 40 looking lost and staring at chess sets. 
Being over 40 myself these days I sometimes get “Sir” from retail staff… makes me feel old. 
Definitely – the vibe from my childhood at least was that it would be downright disrespectful to stay in the car if a cop pulled you over. You got out and meet him (always a “him” back then) and usually moved towards the side of the road so that neither of you were standing in traffic.
The exception (these days) would be a mandatory “drink driving” stop – where they pull everyone over, you roll down the window and say “Evening Officer” along with your name and address (which they’re allowed to ask you – for US Dopers) into the little electronic do-hicky and he or she says “Thank you” ('cos your breath isn’t over the limit – unless really dumb) and you drive off.
Thanks Apollyon - at least I no longer feel like I’m going crazy. And wow - I am really pleased by how many New Zealander’s there are here at the dope.
Interestingly, most of us don’t seem to live in New Zealand.
Isn’t that sad?
Having to say “yessir” to Dad is not universal practice in the US, btw, although it’s not uncommon. My parents never got on this particular power trip, thank God, though lots of the kids from the nearby Air Force base had to do this.
Whenever I see people making their kids say “yes, sir,” or “yes, ma’am,” I think, “Wow, what an asshole.” But that’s just me. Maybe I should move to Australia.
In Spain there’s locations where passengers can’t sit in the front seat (high crime areas); there’s others where they only sit in the front seat if there’s no room otherwise and the driver allows it. In general that’s viewed as the driver’s “private space,” you don’t invade it uninvited.
Just pointing out how once more what’s “common courtesy” in one country is an insult in another.
Oh, it’s not a power trip with my Dad - in fact, he hates it when I do it. As noted, I use it to indicate that I feel he’s getting a little autocratic.
You’re not alone, and I’m a Southerner. Everybody I know who wasn’t forced to do this as a child thinks it’s weird and dickish. Everybody I know who was, was in a military family.
This is not exactly right. You have a common law right to call yourself what you want, and you have a common law right to change your legal name. But you still have only one legal name. You can have assumed names for professional purposes, but so far as the law is concerned, your legal name is the one you were born with, unless you have taken steps to indicate an intent to change your legal name. If Ringo’s legal documents – passport, contracts, bank statements – all say “Richard Starkey,” then his legal name is Richard Starkey and Ringo Starr is just a stage name or professional name, not his legal name.
If the documents don’t match, then there may be some unanswered legal question about which one is his legal name, but that doesn’t change the fact that he can only have one legal name. If it became an issue, a court would look at the evidence and decide. Actually, it probably wouldn’t be that difficult, because the court would simply ask him – “Do you intend to change your legal name to ‘Ringo Starr’?” and if he said “yes,” then the court would find that he had changed his legal name. If he said, “no,” the could would find that Ringo Starr is not his legal name.