Last Friday, right after I did a pregnancy test. I sobbed for about two minutes in sheer terror. I’m very happy now, but I could feel my world shifting into one that’s baby-shaped. I then cried on and off from happiness for about an hour, while on the phone with my husband and a couple of close friends.
And just now, reading grim’s thread. I’m going to curl up on the couch, around my three-week old zygote, and be terrified. grim, I’m so sorry. My prayers are with you and your family.
Just a few hours ago. I was watching Oprah. A few years ago, a woman was on, whose ex had come over and murdered their 4 kids, then took his own life. Today, Oprah brought her back for an update. She was talking about how she had considered suicide following the murders, and how everything, especially holidays, reminded her of her kids. I remember thinking, how on earth does someone go on living after that kind of loss? How do you just get up in the morning and face that kind of horrible void in your life? Well, it turned out that the woman remarried, and has recently given birth to twin girls. They had her new husband on, then they brought out the babies. Then the woman talked about balancing her new life with memories of her former family. She even started a scholarship fund in memory of her kids.
Yesterday. Before that, eight years ago. I’ve worked hard these past eight years, but it appears that I am suddenly in much the same situation I was in back then.
Last Friday. Doesn’t happen often these days, but if I’m ultra-tired, handling way too much multi in the multitask department, then things go into meltdown. That time, though, was principally because I was red-hot angry with someone. Rage and tears tended to blend that afternoon.
Everything’s sorted now, though. Good thing, too – that kinda thing’s embarrassing. sigh
It had been awhile, so long I don’t remember the last.
Yesterday though, during the funeral of an old and very dear family friend, the memories came streaming forth. I’d been able to keep things in check because she’d not been the same for years. Rheumatoid arthritus and all the steroids and pain killers and such had robbed us of her personality years ago. We still loved her dearly, but she was a shell of who she’d been. Then, at the church I saw all the old pictures, those taken when we’d quickly grown to love her so. She was so caring, considerate, genuine, simply the most wonderful person, my Mom’s dearest friend. As I listened to her son talk about her, a last thank you, everything came rushing back. And I quietly cried at losing her all over again.
About two weeks ago when I was delerious in a bout of heat exhaution. Ended up crying on a mat outside clutching a bottle of water and praying for breeze. Took me a good half hour to get my wits back.
Oh yesterday I bawled my head off. We lost our cousin in a car accident on Friday April 13th. My cousin (his mom) keeps sending e-mails with pics of him and stories and I just lost it. They had been searching for a pendant of his that he wore and to no avail they couldn’t find it. They even went back to the crash site to look for it. My cousin’s husband would spend many countless nights wrapped up in a blanket out on their deck looking up at the stars looking for a sign that his son was ok. One night my cuz got worried about where hubby was and called him, he screamed on the phone “GUESS WHAT I AM HOLDING IN MY HAND???” _______ showed his daddy where his pendant lay so that he could bring it home to me.
Thank you baby.
I cried and cried when I finished reading the e-mail. He is truely missed by us all.
When my dog died, May or June 2005. I originally thought it was the second week of December 2004, because that one destroyed my soul, but I was reminded of my poor puppy by a post earlier in this thread.
Tuesday I cried while arguing with my husband. He’s in the hospital in Michigan and I was there for several days staying in a hotel and visiting him during the day. The stress of it all was getting to both of us and we fought over something stupid. I don’t normally cry when we argue, but the tension of everything finally got to me, I guess. We made up though, so it’s ok. And he will be home after the weekend.