I was devastated to be divorced once. I never thought marriage could end in divorce if you went into it seriously, committed to working at it, understood that it wouldn’t always be easy, and had a partner who shared your values. It turns out it only takes one person to make a marriage fail if that one person is a liar and a quitter.
So bearing that in mind, I’m gun-shy about marrying a second time. Trusting a second person to make all those same promises and commitments when I’ve been deceived before is difficult, particularly when the consequences are so harsh. I do trust my new partner and I know he’s of an entirely different character to the ex, and we are having children together which is a much bigger and more permanent union than marriage… with the kids in mind, I am hesitantly considering remarriage, something I never thought I’d do. But if a second marriage failed? That would be absolutely, totally and finally it.
Well, I voted twice, but “it depends” is probably more accurate. Suburban Plankton and I have been married 17+ years (together for 20). It’s been really good and I expect it will continue to be. We are only in our early 40’s so if something happened, I could see getting married again, but I’m don’t know for sure.
Hard to say. My first marriage was a mistake that lasted 21 years. My second wife is my soulmate. It’s difficult to imagine anybody measuring up in the future, but I’ve learned not to try to forecast what may happen. I’m sure she’ll outlive me anyway, barring any accidents.
I got married once, and if I get married again it’ll be common law because we shacked up together. Nothing like living in sin to spice things up. Two’s the limit though.
I’m a 42 year old woman about to get married for the first time. Never had any interest in doing it before, although I did get engaged once a long time ago. Even if we were to split up, I doubt I would ever want to marry anyone else.
By every evidence, I got it absolutely right the first time. We’ve been together long enough, and I’m old enough, that if we were somehow separated, I don’t think I’d bother marrying again.
Only once. And I have done it already, and divorced. I have no desire to marry again, but also no opposition to it - if it was important to the person I was with, I wouldn’t object to it.
Never yet married at 26. If I did find a guy who would put up with me and who made me happy, I’d love to get married. But if it didn’t end up working out, I’d happily become a hermit with many cats for the rest of my life. I witnessed how my mother’s repeatedly poor taste in men ruined her finances, her education, and her chances at happiness. I have no desire to repeat history.
It’s a good thing I’m generally content to be single, since I’m not interested in changing myself to meet a guy’s expectations of femininity. I’m fat, I smoke, I’m too smart to listen to anyone’s bullshit, and a feminist–that right there cuts my dating pool down to practically nothing. I also refuse to shave my legs and pits, so there goes the rest. But hermitdom is a price I’m willing to pay to be myself =)
I never intended to marry, ended up marrying the same guy twice for all the wrong reasons. We were together for 20 years and now, 4 months after the very nasty 2nd divorce was finalized I am realizing that I don’t want to put that much effort into another person who may just up and decide to tip my world over.
I voted for as many times as it takes. I don’t have any desire to be married a large number of times (in fact, hopefully, no more than twice), but if my first marriage taught me anything, it’s to never say never.
I was married once, but I didn’t take it very seriously. In general, I don’t take marriage very seriously. It’s rather ridiculous.
I can’t imagine the set of circumstances that would have to be in place for me to want to get married again, but I acknowledge that I frequently change my mind and that anything is possible. I didn’t want to pick as many times as it takes to get it right because I’m not searching to get anything right. I didn’t want to pick five times because that seems absurd.
I want to have fun with and learn about other people. I’m fairly sure I’ll eventually live with someone else again. But, at the moment, I feel like I’d rather not get married again. It doesn’t mean anything to me, but it does mean a lot to a lot of people, and there’s something assholic about participating in something so important to so many while thinking it’s just foof.
I’m 31, female, never married. Was in love, didn’t work out.
A surprising number of the women I know married twice – once when they were quite young, once when they were older and knew better. My instinct is to say ‘once’, but I know I could foul things up quite well if blinded by love, and nothing blinds quite like it.
I voted never, since it’s clear what is meant is legal marriage.
I was common law “married” to my late “DH” for 23 years. We never felt any need or desire to wed legally, and I can’t see myself ever doing so NOW, even if I ended up in a similar sort of relationship with someone.
I have nothing against the institution, though, for those who feel a desire/need for it.
Now, if asked how many times I would LIVE with someone in a relationship LIKE marriage (as I have done), I’d probably do it as many times as seemed like a good idea.