How nutritious is newsprint? (need answer fast!)

Is the paper itself digestible? Can the soy ink be harvested and turned into milk?

Please help!

Newspaper stew.

Cut newsprint into fine strips. Set aside. Cut meat into small cubes. Add cut-up potatoes, peas, carrots, and vegetables to taste. Throw away newsprint. Cook.

Of course the answers to your questions are no and no. What are you really trying to ask?

wow…it’s been a while since we’ve had a contest for the best thread title…
(Okay, so this one isn’t quite as good as the famous “ventriloquist’s dummy breast question”…but I like it for the suspense factor)

Linky.

Have to say that I just saw Jay Johnson’s one human show, “The Two and Only.” Jay was Chuck and Bob on Soap and the show is about his life in ventriloquism and its history. It’s wonderful. People - honestly - laughed and cried. He’s touring to several major cities this year. See it by any means necessary.

Newsprint is made from mechanical pulp, that is, pulp produced with very few chemicals to aid in the removal of the lignin. Most of it is made from softwood. It will be primarily cellulose and lignin, with small percentages of hemicelluloses, arabinose, galactose, xylose, and mannose.

Some of the hemicelluloses may be digestible, depending on their degree of polymerization, but none of them are nutritious. The lignin and the cellulose are indigestible, but the cellulose is high in fiber.

Only if you happen to be a termite.

Is someone having to eat his/her words? :slight_smile: