Yesterday I got in a long discussion with my SO on the phone where she brought up that she doesn’t think I seem to care what she says/does. When I asked why, she stated that I never pay attention when she talks about important things/confides in me. This was mostly referencing the day before, where she was talking to me (in person) about her friend’s blog on eating disorders and she was mentioning that she had one as well in the past. Apparently during this discussion, late in the evening, I fell asleep :smack: I had remembered her talking about something regarding a blog post, but my mind was blank. I didn’t remember briefly falling asleep either.
I feel terrible. She points out that everything else between us is great so far, except for the fact that she doesn’t think I listen/care what she has to say. She herself has a near-perfect memory and can cite the time, place, topics, EVERYTHING, that was said. She’ll bring up something I said casually four months ago and recite it verbatim :eek:
I don’t know if I can be that good at it myself, but I certainly think I can be better at listening than I am. Any suggestions? I was kind of blindsided by this honestly- I certainly have friends that bring up important topics, which I can remember perfectly fine. I’d prefer to give her the benefit of the doubt and factor out fatigue, ADD (which I have to a degree) and other elements beyond my control, that way I feel like I’m doing everything on my end. All I can really say is that many times when she is talking I have a hard time telling whether something is important or mundane- it would certainly be weird to just sit there with a steno pad and dictate everything she said to avoid possibly missing something important, but I also feel like there’s something I can do to improve in this regard.