I use the telephone and actually write and send real letters. Now the question becomes are we mutually interested in anything? 
Yes… public transit, bicycle, call a taxi. Check Meetup.com for local groups organized around things you’re interested in, then go to the next meeting and hang out, talk to folks, make friends. Or google up a community center or arts center and take classes – great way to meet people as it gives you a built-in conversation starter.
Really, if you want friends, but don’t have them because you never leave the house, you’re going to have to make some effort to change something in order to get what you want.
This thread is kind of coming off like you want to order friends off the internet, which is off-putting and not the way it works in real life. If you want a friend you need to make an effort and bring something to the table. If you just want to rent someone to listen to you, there are therapists for that.
I will. I do not drive. I could use a bus, but the bus stop is a mile away. I weigh 155 kg.
If you have skype hit me up, send me a pm.
I am sorry, I have a cell phone. No skype.
Net 10 – $40/month. No time limit on calls in USA. No foreign calls.
Living in a city without a car and beholden to public transit, I can tell you a mile is not that far. Do it often enough and you’ll get used to it.
If you are online posting under CCitizen you are effectively anonymous, so while your issues may be discussed publically in a forum it’s not like they will attach to you in real life. Unless you are strangling and cooking cats or pimping toddlers you can talk pretty much about anything. There are lot of personal subjects people talk about freely here they would never discuss with their closest friends.
I find that the multiple perspectives offered here a lot more effective for getting useful broad based feedback vs a chat with a random phone buddy who does not know you from Adam.
This assumes you are looking for feedback, if it’s just human conversation for emotional connection reasons then you might be better off joining a local volunteer or service organization and making friends that way.
Step one: Meet people in some public venue. This can be in person, or on the Internet. I know you said there are some things you don’t want to talk about in public, so just don’t bring those up yet. But there is no other way to meet people, because nobody’s going to go into a private venue with someone they don’t know.
Step two: Get to know some of those people better. Talk with them about whatever you do feel like you can talk about in public. Find some of them who seem to share your interests, or otherwise get along well with you.
Step three: Once you’ve gotten to know some of these people better, ask them privately (nearly every online venue has some means of private messaging) for their phone number. If they don’t give it, apparently you don’t know that person as well as you thought; start over. If they do, you can then give that person a call.
Serious advice:
- Go out and do something where you will meet people. Volunteer, play bridge, take a class, go to church, join a bowling team, join a trivia team, take up dancing, go hiking with “meetups”, etc.
Living a mile from public transit isn’t too bad. And I don’t know why you say you weight 155lbs. That sounds like a pretty normal weight. A bit light for a guy, and bit heavy for a girl, but I would expect an adult weighing 155 to be mobile.
- If you are disabled, and can’t physically get out, meet people on-line. Like here. And other chat sites. If you strike up a conversation with someone who seems pleasant, send them a private message and see if they are interesting in meeting over the phone. Most won’t be, but don’t give up. I bet you can find someone.
I weigh 155 kg.
Correction: The OP said he weighs 155 kg, so about 340 lbs.
Who knows? No one is secure from cyberstalkers. Any time someone is doxxed all their online history belongs to all their future employers and acquaintances.
I know. I am an Aspie with depression – thus I rarely make any friends.
155 kg.
I am sorry for being brief – my old computer’s fault.
Are you on meds or seeing a therapist for your depression? How are you managing it?
Fortunately I take Effexor. But I have seen my therapist about thrice a year for the last few years.
How can I find a telephone therapist?
Glad to hear you are treating w/a med. Many therapists do telehealth now -
but I believe you said you are not setup computer-wise for that?
If you are in the USA, your county likely has mental health services - can you begin by calling them for resources? Or ask the therapist you had been seeing to refer you to a resource? Sounds like you really could benefit from more consistent 1:1 time with a therapist - so maybe put your energies into securing that as it’ll likely be easier that scouting for friends in isolation, KWIM?
I think you should do some volunteer work. Maybe go to an old folks home and let them know you’d like to visit with some of the folks who don’t get any visitors? It would be a great way to find some non-judgmental, friendly folks who are grateful for a chance to chat. You can build friendships and social skills, and IME old folks give the best advice of anyone. After all, they’ve got more experience. Just be prepared to explain and answer questions about Asperger’s, their generation didn’t learn about it at all.
A mile is really a long way at your weight, I get it. But if you go towards it each day, and turn back only when you have to, your body will catch up surprisingly fast. The human body is always most protective of the ability to walk, so it’s the best way to get in shape for those of us who let it go Waaayyyyyyy too long.
Do I recall correctly that you are living with your folks? And were in some sort of mathematics internship? How old are you? Where do you live (approximately) Are you still in school? Are you studying something you like now?
meetup.com is also a good place to look for local like-minded people. My area has groups for everything from language learners to single Moms to over-30 lego sculptors. Check it out.
>Sounds like you really could benefit from more consistent 1:1 time with a therapist
> - so maybe put your energies into securing that as it’ll likely be easier that scouting
> for friends in isolation, KWIM?
Thanks! I would greatly benefit from phone therapy. There are many sites offering phone therapy.
Unfortunately, their prices are not reasonable.