Before we get that far, hows about you just legally change your name to Green Bean?
That’ll be good for some real WTF? 
moments around the water cooler.
My given name is Katrina, and I’ve never gone by a nickname. I get a lot of people who’ll call me by my full name for a period of weeks or months and suddenly turn to me and say, “Can I just call you Kat?” Like they’ve just realized all the man-hours they’ve wasted by saying the last two syllables all this time.
The answer usually is a confused, “No. I’ve never been called that,” because by the time they ask it, we’ve known each other long enough that I’m surprised it’s even come up.
i had a co worker that was a “lawrence” not larry, not lawry, not rence, or ren; lawrence.
he had a great way of enforcing it.
someone would stop by, “hey larry, how’s it going?”
he would answer, “lawrence, just fine and you?”
baffled person: i’m okay, but my name isn’t lawrence.
he would then say: yes, but mine is.
that would get usually 2 replies, “oh, i get it.” or “huh?” to huh he would reply, my name… it’s lawrence.
very easy, and he would just keep saying his name, if they didn’t get it the first or 18th time. he would always start off with “lawrence…”
the funniest one was the one guy who called him lenny, neither of us could figure it out. after a month of “lawrence…” the guy finally asked him why he always said lawrence.
he said that’s my name. the other guy actually, for real, said " oh, i thought it was leonard!"
years later and all one of us needs to say is leonard, and we are useless for at least a good half hour.
so just start out all your responses to the dreaded unwanted name, with elizabeth.
and don’t worry if you sound like you are asking them to call you “your majesty”; her name is elizabeth, and i’m really sure, no one, not even jimmy carter, calls her liz. (her official family nic. is lilibet, which is kinda cute.)
At Weight Watchers last night, there was a new checker-in person who I’ve seen maybe once before. ALL of my materials have my name as Gwendolen, including the nametag she handed me as she said, “OK, Gwen, have a good meeting.”
:smack:
Nope, but I wasn’t expecting a reply. It was the last email in the exchange.
They’d probably insist on calling me “Ree” or something.
Just be glad you don’t spell it “Catriona” or something. I can’t believe that people sometimes say my name is hard to spell or remember, and that’s why they want to call me Liz.
I like that strategy!
Heh. You know, sometimes when I meet someone and they express that they have trouble remembering names, I tell them “Elizabeth–like the Queen!” That’s so obnoxious that they usually remember it thereafter. Of course sometimes they call me Queen Elizabeth, but I guess that’s just an occupational hazard.
ETA: gigi–Maybe they thought your name needed to go on a diet.
I had a friend named Robert who handled it thus: “My friends call me Robert.” And they do. interestingly, in light of the OP, he and everyone else calls his wife Lis (she’s Australian and I guess her full name is Elisabeth, hence the “s”).
It IS a mouthful. 
This cracks me up. My name is Cathy, not Catherine or Cathleen, just Cathy. I cannot tell you (but apparently, I don’t have to) how many teachers insisted that Cathy couldn’t be my name because it had to be short for something else. They’d get really insistent about it too, as if they didn’t have my name on official paperwork right in front of them. Sigh.
Most people at work don’t shorten it, unless they’re good friends (then it’s Cath). My family calls me Cat. My husband never abbreviates it, even though he personally prefers Steve to Steven.
I had one boss who called me Cath from the start, which was very jarring at first. I thought that was weird, so I started calling him Ger, nicknaming his nickname Gerry (from Gerald). He didn’t have a problem with that, so I still do it. It’s been years now, though, so I don’t mind him calling me Cath.
Oh, hi Elizabeth!
“My name is Elizardbreath”. I guarantee they won’t forget it!