How would you torpedo the Heterosexual Marriage Movement?

In My Humble Opinion
1

In jesting response to Skald’s thread on the subject, I thought a point-counterpoint thread should be made.

I would find the sex tape of the whitest Hetero guy out there, AL Gore comes to mind, and put it out there. Watching Al Gore have sex ( with anyone, let alone his wife) would be enough to send people over to the gayside for something alittle more original.

2

I would think that a dispassionate review of the rate of failure (divorce rate) would pretty well discredit the movement… :wink:

3

I think the Bridezilla shows all over cable are doing a pretty good job today.

4

Assuming I have the kaboodles of money, contacts, etc that were posited in the other thread, I’d manoeuver things so that divorce would be made illegal and marriage would be compulsory (with no “conscientious objection” nonsense) for everybody 25yo or above. Widowed people would have to remarry within at most two calendar years of their prior spouse’s death.

Now excuse me while I go puke…

5

Homosexual marriage is the bedrock of national security itself! The sacred bonds between lovers in battle have maintained the fighting spirit of men since the days of ancient Sparta herself. To allow heterosexual marriage, while our front-line combat soldiers are still overwhelmingly male*, would cheapen the sacrifice of our brave soldiers who’ve died for their husbands and country alike. It’s downright unpatriotic!

*Yes, I know many women serve in the military, and the “front line” is a nearly meaningless concept these days. But come on, I’ve got my Bizarro World Conservative hat on.

6

Implement it exactly as described in the old testament of the Bible. Fornication is illegal, contraception is illegal, abortion is illegal, no prosecution for marital rape, and women can not sue for divorce. Better yet, add on the ability of a man to take a concubine without his wife’s consent and to divorce his wife by just saying “I divorce you” three times. Do away with alimony, and child support. Watch the train wreck.

Enjoy,
Steven

7

“The Larry King Wife-a-palooza Show!”

8

Take away the tax benefits, financial incentives for children etc…, every “business” advantage of being married. Marriage’s inherent unpleasantness does the rest :wink: