This is a question my mom sent me via e-mail, that she has mentioned to me before, that I thought I would send before the straight dope.
here’s the e-mail she sent me:
Hi honey…
When you get a chance, could you help me find research that supports a 6 or 7 year old’s ability to discern his transgender status…to the point that a parent and community should let him convert to a total female identity?
I’m really struggling, not with the concept of transgender. I accept that and support the needs. But I am struggling with a family (that isn’t particularly stable to begin with) at our school who as decided that because their son at age 6 wanted to wear nail polish and dresses, he should have his identity completely altered. He was withdrawn from SRE about 3 months ago and is now returning as a girl (7 years old, 2nd grade) with a new name, pierced ears, dresses and longer hair. It just seems a little too young to completely dive into this new identity.
So, I thought if there was some unbaised research I could find or articles to support this type of action, it could help me sort it out.
If you find anything, please let me know.
What can I tell my mom (who is being really understanding and open about this for her, and I’m really proud of her for accepting this in general)?
If it helps, 20/20 did a piece on this some months ago. I didn’t get to see all of it, but the parts I saw were really well done for mainstream newsprogramming. You should check it out, and maybe forward the interesting parts on. But I’ll echo Miller and make sure they’re in contact with a licensed someone someone professional.
My guess is if the child decided in a year or two to take back the aspect of the original gender, the parents would allow it, if they allowed the original change. I would be against any sort of SRS surgery until the child reaches adulthood.
I saw/heard a piece about kids being transgendered (sorry I can’t be more specific than that) and in several of the cases profiled, at very young ages (pre-teen) the children actively tried to correct the gender mis-match. One of them going so far as to try and amputate their penis. The doctor interviewed who did surgeries on children said that it was better to begin the process early in puberty so that the bodies development wouldn’t be dramatically changed by the sex xharacteristics that they were transitioning away from.
IIRC, scans have shown significant differences in the brains of people who are transgendered. So it would seem to me that it’s possible to have an accurate diagnosis of a person.
AFAICT pretty much everyone in the trans community in Canada thinks Zucker is a quack and his Toronto clinic is a chamber of horrors. I know someone who would sooner go without coverage for his SRS than go to Zucker’s clinic (that’s the choice he’s facing) because the procedures are completely humiliating and they don’t even use the Benjamin standards.
The family could really use (competent!) psychological care from someone who’s familiar with gender issues in young children. If it does seem that the child is strongly transgender, one option is the use of androgen blockers, which forestall puberty until the child is of an age to make the decision on further medical transition. If the decision is ‘no,’ the blockers can be withdrawn and male puberty will proceed; if ‘yes,’ female hormones can be given and the child will be saved a lot of stress and anguish during puberty.
There are starting to be a few support services for parents of young children with gender issues – the parents might not be able to find one in their area, but thanks to the wonder of the Internet they’ll probably be able to find resources somewhere.
I know this is a short summary of what’s going on, but it makes you wonder that the parents are deciding something based on some behavior. What does the kid actually say, if anything? Playing dress-up at age six doesn’t seem conclusive.
Excellent question, and I think Tuckerfan and StGermain touched on the answer.
The behavior of transgendered kids generally goes way beyond “my daughter doesn’t like wearing dresses” or “my son wants to play dress-up.” Some TG kids become absolutely hysterical when forced into gender-appropriate behavior or clothing. Likewise, it’s not uncommon for a non-TG child to say “I wish I were a boy/girl/pink unicorn.” A TG kid will often insist, regardless of the physical evidence to the contrary, “I AM a boy/girl.”
There are several reasons that the approach mentioned by the OP’s Mom is a good one. Pre-pubescent children are fairly interchangeable when clothed. Put a dress and nail polish on a typical 7-year-old male, and he’ll be read as female. A young child also doesn’t have the paper trail and the tangled web of relationships typical of an adult. Transitioning really can be as easy as getting some new clothes and a haircut and transferring to a new school. Should it be necessary to transition back to the child’s biological gender, it’s straightforward because the initial transition doesn’t rely on hormones or surgery (although puberty may be suppressed chemically).
I contrast this with my own transition (as an adult). It was about as painless as it gets (I was not married, I had no kids, I was working in my first “real” job, I had no professional or academic history), but I was still overwhelmed by the amount of “stuff” that needed correcting and the number of people to whom I had to explain myself. Had I been able to transition in grade school, my life would have been much simpler, I think.
I’ll see if I can get my mom to get a guest membership to explain the situation better.
From what she says, it does sound like a potentially odd situation, although I think there is a child psychologist involved, since there is psysician involvement.
There is currently a public relations campaign here in the Netherlands on the subject of kids and gender dysphoria. Here is a link in English with an article. If your mother follows the links at the bottom of the page she will find a number of other articles on the subject.
Around here there is a protocol for handling transgender or intersex kids and teens. It does involve transitioning as a child – and around here this usually includes having the story made known to the school and other social groups.
My mom stopped by, said she doesn’t have any answers, and won’t until the child has been back in school a while. I said she can revisit the topic when she gets more information.
Tell me about it! I have some female cousins who were raised to believe that the only thing women should do in life is get married and have babies. Can you believe that crap?
I’m curious, too, even though I don’t know. The movie “Ma Vie En Rose” is about a transgendered young boy, whose friends/family/neighbors don’t get him or his desire to be a girl. He’s about seven or so and seems definite. I suppose I’m curious about how many kids who feel this way actually end up identifying as transgendered as adults. I just felt so bad for that kid because no one wanted to let him do what he wanted/needed…but then again…he was only seven.