How zombie-proof is your home?

In the event of zombie apocalypse, how well protected is your home?

Personally, I don’t think I would hole up in my home. Far too many entrances and windows. I think an ideal zombie-proof house would have fairly minimal points of entry/and or secure ones- that way if you had to barricade yourself up against zombie hordes there would be fewer places to protect with more attention payed to each.

When the zombies attack, and I’m sure it’s soon, my only hope is to get into the storm shelter. From there, if I have my hatchet, I can lop their heads off one by one until the shelter fills with bodies. Hopefully I’ll at the top by then and can still breath.

Then it’s just a matter of waiting it out for a few months on nothing but zombie meat and maggots, until help arrives.

Plus, over time you can make faux-sandbags/barricades with the permanently-dead bodies…as morbid as that may be.

wishes his house had an escape pod

We’re on the top floor of a very tall building. There are supermarkets and such just ten feet from our lobby. All the windows are reinforced with iron grates, save the glass doors that open to the balcony, but unless we’re talking Spiderzombies, I don’t think there’s much to worry about. If push comes to shove, we have an excellent collection of horribly overpowered BB guns and a veritable armory of kitchen knives. Also, I am perfectly willing to resort to the murder and cannibalism of my family members (if necessary), while they probably are not.

I could come out of this smelling like a bed of roses.

And rich, from insurance money.


Are we talking risen-from-the-grave zombies, or humans-infected-by-virus zombies? Because the cemetery is right across the street from me. :frowning:

Fortunately, we have a fire escape that doesn’t drop to the ground until we walk onto it. Hopefully it’ll crush some zombie skulls when used.

I live on the tenth floor of a 20-floor building, so I might be right in the middle of the action if the zombies got in. On the other hand, unless they can climb walls, there’s only one way in and that’s a pretty secure door.

Plus, the hallway outside the door is relatively narrow, so it wouldn’t be too hard to rush them and send them over the edge.

Not especially well defendable…but I’m about twenty minutes drive away from a little remembered fort that has a stockade, on-site well, and ocean access. I figure I could make a break for that.

My strategy: tear my clothes, sprinkle some earth over myself, stare in the distance, and start mumbling. The zombies will then assume I am one of them and leave me alone.

I don’t see that this is related to arts or entertainment, unless you’ve got a specific movie in mind or require people to indicated which movie-zombies they’re protecting against. As the question is put, it’s not Cafe Society material. Hence, I’m moving this MPSIMS-ward.

I assumed he was talking about Romero zombies, not the fast zombies from the DotD remake or 28 Days Later.

I’m in a second floor apartment with only one door, so I’m thinking it wouldn’t be too hard to barricade the door and keep them out with a little firepower looted from the local pawn shop. I suppose the neighbors and I could team up for some quick expeditions to some nearby grocery stores, but I think the big problem would be how long the utilities and water would stay on. This place is funky without air-conditioning, man.

How does one go about zombie-proofing one’s home, anyway? And looking beyond immediate survival, are we hoping the government will reform somehow and get the sitation under control?

I don’t think my second floor apt in this two flat would be very defensible, however there’s a very large highschool at the end of my block. It’s massive, mostly stone/marble exterior and the doors are all the big metal security types, and no ground-floor windows. I would think this H.S. has everything I and many others (nah, screw 'em) would need including full kitchen and already stocked pantry, medical supplies, a gymnasium full of dodgeballs, lockerrooms with showers, a/v dept., a few trucks and several school buses, an auto/metal shop class with welding materials, building wide P.A. system and an old fallout shelter in case the building is breeched and the school buses are destroyed or unreachable for escape.

I take it everyone has picked themselves up a copy of The Zombie Survival Guide - Complete Protection From the Living Dead by Max Brooks? It’s hilarious

Just have to figure a way of kicking out some of the zombies attending the H.S.

Oh man, I’m screwed. All my windows are single pane, easy breaking by zombie hands. The first floor windows are a bit high, probably 6-7 feet off of the ground, but they can boost their zombie friends right through. I have a wooden cellar door that will be easy pickings, so they can establish base camp under my feet and cut off my power and water. My front and back doors both have large windowed areas.

There are at least 7 points of entry to defend that are accessible without climbing a ladder. Bad news.

I live on the top floor of a ten-story building, only two entrances (one elevator that opens directly into the entryway and one staircase out the back). So, elevated and easily securable entry points. We’ve got our earthquake survival kit of canned food, MREs, etc and lots of bottled water, so we’d be okay without venturing out for a couple of weeks at least. Lots of projectile weapons including a catapult, lots of pointy things as well. Only drawback is that there isn’t a food shop really nearby, and that there’s no roof-mounted water tank. All in all, a 6 out of 10 for defensibility.

Huh. I’ve got a two story house with a finished basement. The top two stories are a loss (window that would be easy to break, even tho’ they’re double-paned, and french doors to the back that would be easy to jimmy open), but the basement has promise. If I can wedge the door from the first story closed, I think I’d be good - the door to the garage has a stout lock and would do well with the garage door closed (that things a bitch to open - really heavy). The storm windows are somewhat of a worry, but they’re not very clean, easy to obscure, hard to crawl through, and there’s only one in the main finished section. I’ve got a fireplace down there, so as long as I drag enough supplies down there with me, I’m set. Keeping all the lights off, however, will make it a bit dark.

It’s the weapons I’m a little light on. Got some good knives, but nothing really solid. You know, like a cricket bat.

Home; not Zombie proof, it’s a 200+ year old Colonial with at least 4 doors, all on opposite sides of the house, lots of ground-flloor windows, the second floor can be accessed by two opposing stairwells, once the lower floor has been breached, assuming the stenches can climb stairs, there’s no escape, the second floor attic also has two entry points, really the only defensable point in the house is the upper attic, just one narrow doorway leads up to that, problem is, it’s an attic and has no running water or electricity, but it’s the most easily defended point in the house…

in the event of a Zombie uprising, i wouldn’t hole up there that’s for sure

now, work, OTOH, that’s also a risk, but less risk than home, there’s only one exterior entrance, a large, steel fireproof door with a deadbolt, no way the stenches can breach that, the office next door that shares an inside door with us has a huge wooden door, wide enough to drive a subcompact car through, it’s a metal -reinforced door though, just as sturdy as our fire-door

we have running water and electricity available if i holed up at work, problem is, it’s in a small to midsize town in New Hampshire, in the heart of the city, so the concentration of shamblers would be higher at work, at home there are more entry points, but the area is sparsely populated, so the “Zombie-Per-Acre” ratio would be lower…

hmm, hole up at work, with stronger doors, running water, and electricity, or at home with no water/electricity, but a more secluded spot…

Who’s staying in the house? I fully plan on joining the Redneck Zombie Elimination Militia, riding around in pickup truck beds and raining hot lead on the living dead with my (in the event of Zombie Armaggedon) new aquired B.A.R.

Not very secure, unfortunately. However, I do have a ‘safe room’ (walk in closet off my bedroom) full of weapons, holy relics and holy water. No, I’m not kidding. My parents are Catholic Globetrotters and send me all sorts of stuff from their pilgrimages in the hopes of reclaiming me. So, when the vampires show up, I’ll be ready.

BTW- favorite family game: go out to a TGIFridays, Cracker Barrel, etc.- anywhere they have stuff hanging off the walls- and spy out interesting ways to kill Zombies with shears, saws, hatchets, and so on. Extra points for using non-standard items to dispatch the undead (washboards, bowling pins, etc.)

Personally, I’m headed over to the Winchester, have a nice cold pint, and wait for all of this to blow over.

Brill’ant!, but remember, dogs can’t look up…

I’m screwed. I have big picture windows and sliding glass doors on the ground floor of my house, no basement, and a very open & airy floor plan. I have a good supply of weapons, including a fire axe, floor/ice scraper, chef knives, aluminum baseball bats, chainsaw and samurai sword. I’m not sure if the zombie virus affects dogs, but my pit bull loves to play rough and could take down at least a couple shamblers. IF I could screw plywood over the windows & sliding door downstairs I could last until the water heater went dry.
If it’s the fast-running infected we’re dealing with, I’m screwed.