I accidentally melted my alarm clock.

So I have this 100W clip on reading lamp on my night stand that I hardly use. On that same nightstand is my alarm clock. Well, the other night I turned on the reading lamp for something and it was too bright so to make it less bright I aimed it right down on my alarm clock, about 2 inches off the top of the clock. The room wasn’t much brighter than my actions,so I was happy. So I left the room to go cook some pizza rolls and didn’t come back for about 3 hours.

When I returned I found my clock had melted into a puddle of sorts. I could still read the clock, but I couldn’t set it, turn on the alarm, the radio, or anything. IT looked like a cheese pizza or something. I amlucky I didn’t burn down my apt building.

Anyone else ever melt anything by accident? Not much fun.

I bought a wireless network adapter for the computer in my car. To get a good signal, I decided it would go in the back window.

The day I put it there, I came out to go to lunch and found that it had melted. It still worked, it just looked like Dali worked for Linksys.

Someone beat me to the Salvador Dali joke. Damn!

I melted my discman, but I forgot how it happened.

I’ve melted far too many things.

Back when I was a kid, a friend and I found a toy at a garage sale called (I think) a “Creature Caster”. Basically it was a little plug-in hotplate with little metal moulds of Frankenstein, Dracula, the Wolfman, etc. I think the idea was that you were supposed to squirt in some kind of liquid goo, bake it, and voilá, little rubber monsters (ah, the 60’s. The last refuge of hot, sharp, breakable choking-hazard toys).

Anyway, since we didn’t have any of this goo, we hacked up his sisters favorite Barbie doll and melted chunks of her in the moulds with limited success. This kept us occupied until cartoons came on, then we drifted off to watch the tube.

Of course we didn’t unplug it.

About three or four hours later we returned to find a saucer-sized crater melted in the faux-woodgrain plastic table, complete with stringy, drippy stalagtites of brown melted plastic running down to the Creature Caster, which was now on the floor in a puddle. Thankfully this was in a concrete floored garage.

After weighing various schemes for explaining ourselves we opted to just chuck the table and plead ignorance should it be missed (it wasn’t, though Barbie missing arms brought us some heat). The only lasting damage was to the garages concrete floor, as it a few good whacks with a hammer to dislodge the melted mess.

I melt alot of things. Not by accident, though…

I distinctly remember melting my barbie’s heads on the stove element, when I was like, 8ish.

Great fun.

The time: 1998
The place: The Kitchen

You know how some ovens don’t close all the way, but lock open so there is about a 5 inch gap at the top?

Well, it was in this position set at about 350 degrees.

I’m cleaning my glasses and…FUMBLE!!

A nice spinning drop into the oven.

I’m thinking…“GO GET THEM!!”. But, no, it’s sort of too late.

Melted glasses have no useful purpose.