Is this going to end up in a duel? If so, I’d like to watch.
All this is due to a fight over Pepperidge Farm cookies?
At least we’re talking decent baked goods. I know of someone who was murdered over a Little Debbie snack cake.
That’s just wrong.
That’s not a good nickname to get from a girl in any sense of the term.
Yes, thank God. 
Well, if you don’t do it your neighbor would. I could never stay late at my GF’s because if they thought we were doing it, in her words, “something very bad would happen”. We always had to meet up at my place and I would have to have her home before dark. After a while, she didn’t want me coming by at all because “people are getting suspicious, there is no reason they can see for you to be coing here”. That is a big reason she had to move out of Glendale. The have there own little Taliban, and she had had enough. Sorry you don’t know squat about Glendale Armenians.
I prescribe dried frog pills. 
No charge for that, and that’s cuttin me own throat.
It depends on whether they’re Western Armenian (Glendale) or Eastern Armenian (Hollywood).