Dude
Why are you doing the guy’s homework if he is going to turn on you? If I were you, I would start making contingency plans.
Get them to agree to have the meeting sometime in the next seven days, and make them also promise that you won’t know what day the meeting will be beforehand. That way, it’s logically impossible for them to ever have the meeting. For they can’t have it on the last day, since you’d know on the second-to-last day. So they can’t have it on the secon-to-last-day, since you’d know on the third-to-last day. And so on. Really. Cite (postscript file).
If you must duke it out in someway (and I agree that it is best to try and do this one and one in a nonconfrontational manner) use the Java. Black mail Paul with the homework stuff. It can’t make things that much worse if they are going to jump on you. Also go about, with help from mutual friends who are not adverse to this sort of thing, setting the three against eachother. Drop hints and leave “evidence” for April that Paul is cheating on her. She seems fairly unreasonable so you may have a good chance of planting real doubt. That will break up the block and make them forget about you. If you can fix the discord that you’ve caused and take credit for saving their relationship (assuming they would retain a fair deal of gratitude for that).
Of course doing it with the one on one conversations and other civil means is probably better. Regardless don’t go into a meeting with three against you, even if the neutral moderator is on yourside.
The dreaded meeting has not yet come. I’m going to talk to Paul later and tell him it happens as soon as possible - this is not going to be left hanging over my head come finals week. If it gets down to the wire, I’ll take Manda JO’s advice and simply refuse to have a meeting.
In other news, Paul and April had a fight this morning that I had the pleasure of listening to. Apparantly she left an opened piece of mail in his room - a credit card statement. I guess she’s got $1000 run up on it. Paul saw it and started lecturing her about being more responsible, and told her that he’d probably be the one who ended up paying it in the end (knowing their relationship, this is quite likely).
April accused him of reading her mail. She said he was guilty of a federal offense. I’d like to think she was joking around, but I don’t think so.
A division in the ranks? Hard to say; they may be the strongest of allies again tomorrow.
Factor X still looms menacingly …
(The easiest way for a professor to convince students to read Machiavelli is to point out situations like this.)
And since this is the Pit: goddamned motherfucking corksucking camel-fondlers! Ah, theraputic! 
Goddam, this is exciting!
When will the Evil Roommates spring the meeting?
Will Blackknight even attend?
Will the argument between Paul and April swing Paul around to Our Hero’s side?
Tune in next week to find out, same Dope time, same Dope channel!
I wholeheartedly agree with Manda Jo. Grab your crotch, say “Meet this,” and go into your room or out for a pizza.
If all is as you say it is, you’re under no obligation to stand trial before their kangaroo court.
Further, if they do present you with some trumped-up complaint, you might just say, “Hm, that bugs you, huh? Well, I’ll miss ya. When are you moving out?”
Rysdad–who has always had problems with people asserting authority they don’t really have.
Call the meeting at the next instant that you have everyone present. Tell them that you do not expect them to be delighted with your every personal trait, but that you don’t expect to be hearing their opinions on every choice.
Ask if they want a chore list, and if so, have them set up four lists of what one person should do, you get first pick, or vice versa.
Put down on paper what is agreed, and make sure everyone admits that they agree.
Leave at the end of the month.
Never speak with these people again until you all have grandchildren.
Tris
Out of curiosity, why do you keep doing Paul’s homework for him? Let the big baby do his own homework!
You want me to get you banned for that? Well? Do ya? Punk?
[celestina whip out her virtual paddle and applies it liberally on Blackknight’s virtual bottom]
Blackknight, I am sorry that you’re having trouble communicating effectively with your roommates, but I have to focus on something that a few folks have been pointing out, but IMHO not scolding you strongly enough about. Why in the hell are you doing your roommate’s homework for him?! I don’t care if you are getting along, if Paul’s your best friend, or if you can’t stand each other. You should not be doing Paul’s work!
:mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad:
I have a real problem with your just blithely announcing on a website that is dedicated to some great degree to educating folks and to the larger goal of intellectual honesty that you are aiding someone in cheating! Do you not see something wrong with that? Hypocritical perhaps? Yes, I know you’re concerned with the stressful conditions you’re living in, and I do feel for you in that respect, but you have just identified yourself and one of your roommates as being liars.
I just get so tired of hearing this bullshit from students and non-students. I have no patience with or respect for anyone who will not take it upon him/herself to earn his/her grades honestly and fairly. It seems like increasingly more and more folks just don’t care and think that there’s nothing wrong with not doing their own fucking work. And apparently lots of folks nowadays must think that there won’t be any repercussions for dishonesty. What you and Paul are doing is cheating, and it is wrong. I don’t know why Paul’s taking this Java class, but he obviously isn’t getting what he needs to get out of it, and you are not helping him in the short or long run by doing his homework for him. If you do his homework, how will he know what he truly understands and what he needs to work on? If he is a computer science major or planning on writing computer programs of some sort someday, then you and he are creating problems for him and for future folks who will probably have to deal with his lack of understanding of Java and probably other computer languages as well. You are reinforcing in his mind and in the minds of other folks who are reading this thread that cheating is okay. Also, given your living situation where folks don’t communicate or really seem to respect each other, I don’t understand how you can live with yourself knowing that you and he have so little respect for academic integrity or even that you’re considering going one step further and considering blackmailing Paul. You both ought to be ashamed of yourselves! In fact every last one of the folks in this thread who’ve not taken you to task for your intellectual dishonesty ought to be ashamed of themselves! If you are a student like Paul, then your continued complicity in helping Paul cheat may come back to haunt you and him as well. It may get you both expelled from school at the very worst and tarnish your academic records.
I imagine based on what you’ve relayed so far there’s plenty of things you can’t control in this situation. You can’t make your roommates stop be assholes, bitchy, manipulative, or slobs. However, you shouldn’t have needed your friend to tell Paul how not to gang up on you. You should have sat down with Paul and had the conversation your friend had with him. Likewise, you shouldn’t be waiting for your roommates to spring this Inquisition on you. As has been suggested already, try talking to them individually, and if they don’t want to meet you halfway in that regard, then it really is time for you to consider leaving this unhealthy situation. There is such a thing as getting someone to sublet your room and/or there may be a way for you to break your lease. Whatever Factor X is, it is not right that these three folks who strike me as being very immature, selfish, self-centered, and not all that intelligent are trying to use something you don’t know about as an excuse to gang up on you. How can you work with them to fix the problem unless you know what the problem is? And, if they want you to work with them, then they need to grow up, approach you in a respectful manner, and communicate with you. You also need to grow up and quit letting them use you as a doormat and possible scapegoat. Quit cheating. And quit cheating yourself.
Flash News Update: Before I go to bed tonight, I bring you this important update.
(Imagine a picture of a radio tower poised on the globe, with little lightening bolt squiggles shooting off the top. This is how you know this is important news.)
I do the Java homework because I felt I needed the practice in Java, and I somewhat enjoy the challenge. Java is fun, and I hadn’t had any experience with Swing (a type of graphic interface system for Java), which is what they were mainly using. I basically did it for the education.
It started out as just helping him with the homework. I thought, “Ok, I can learn this stuff and help a friend too. Cool.” It didn’t stay that way for long though.
Secondly, and most shockingly: I was making myself hot cocoa (because God thinks it’s funny to have it snow on May 7th), and I noticed an opened bag of Circus Peanuts[sup]TM[/sup] on the counter.
Half of them were missing and are presumed eaten.
This is absolute proof of the wretched vileness of the Evil Roommate Conspiracy.
Stay tuned for more news from the front. As Miller put it, “same Dope time, same Dope channel!”
On preview:
FTR, I have not considered (and will not consider) blackmailing Paul about the Java programs. Wikkit suggested that, as a joke. I mentioned the Java to point out that it’s not like I haven’t done anything for Paul.
On every other point, celestina, you’re right. 
I am totally hooked by this thread. I had room mates like that, they blamed me for everything, even though they were the ones having people over all hours of the day and night, blamed me for dishes, even though I had exactly One pan, two bowls, two plates and two sets of sivlerware, and a strainer. (I ate pasta every night.) I’d use plastic cups and plates if I had extra # to buy it. Eventually I just built some shelves in my room with milk crates, brought my food, and all my stuff in there, and never came out. My freinds would hang out in my room, they had the rest of the appartment, other than kitchen & bathroom. (I wasn’t a total dick, my stuff didn’t include a TV, VCR, Playstation, so is wasn’t the same as your roommate) I stayed out the year, and got the fuck out of there.
Black Knight
You never mentioned if moving out will be a feasible option. Who’s name is on the lease? If all of you are on it, they cannot boot you out. I would strongly reconsider the living arrangement. Since it sounds like you are in school, can you find a new place for next year?
I’ve had living arrangements go sour before, and it is my experience that it will not get better only worse.
Good Luck
More lease errata …
This may be Minnesota-wide, or specific to the suburb of Minneapolis in which I lived, but if hypothetically four people are on the lease, but only one of those four have signed the lease, the other three people have the same rights and responsibilities. That is, the person who signed the lease cannot say “Hey, you never signed the lease, move out.” The response to that is, “You signed for me when you signed for all of us. Nyah nyah nyah nyah nyah.”
I apologize for this, but every time I see the thread title I think:
I am the very target of a modern inquisitional
My tolerance is growing thin on matters interpersonal
I feel that all his roomies have been acting quite irrational.
The roomies are broke down into groups that are quite fractional.
Crap! I meant factional.
i am replying only to get on the email for this post…this is nuts, and i think blacknight should write a book…funny stff
jaytini2, you don’t have to reply. just click the link at the bottom of the thread (under the reply area) that says “Subscribe to this Thread” that’s how i’ve been following it.