I am turning into a sociopath

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

I was driving my car to pick up some take-out food the other day. It was a long walk to get to it, parked in an open lot, and here in Boston it was about 40 degrees, windy, and raining. I can’t stand being wet, especially in a car. So I was miserable just starting out.

Traffic was terrible, as usual. When I got to the restaraunt, there were two cars parked in the “No Standing, Pick-up Only” zone in front. Of course, there was nowhere else to park anywhere on the block, and the street was too narrow to double-park and run in. I cruise around for a fifteen minutes, hitting several enormous potholes along the way (they were hidden in the rain), and finally find somewhere to leave my car, quite a bit away. I get out of my car and start walking. The wind is blowing so hard that I have to hold my umbrella near-horizontal to keep myself from getting wet, which of course means I can’t see where I’m going. Of course, I still get drenched, and narrowly avoid spearing someone in front of me with the tip of the umbrella.

After waiting in the (loud) restaurant for some hard-of-hearing person to place an order at the takeout counter, I get the food, and bring it back to the car. I didn’t place the order, and whatever my friends ordered smells awful, like a roasted gym sneaker. I put it in the trunk, and drive off, soaking wet, in a foul mood.

I’m driving down an avenue, in the right lane, and there are three people walking on the sidewalk, rather close to the road. As I pass them, I hit a large puddle, and out of the corner of my eye see a huge wave of water rise up from my tire. A second passes, and I hear a trio of Valley-girl, airhead shrieks.

I chuckled … and my mood improved.

A few hundred feet down the road, I thought “Why the hell did I laugh at that?”, and started to feel bad. Not enough to turn around, though. Hopefully only their feet got wet.

What the hell? It was an accident, of course, but still … I laughed. I feel like I’m turning into Tony Soprano.

2

You know that that’s an offence in the U.K.? Unless you’ve got a good excuse - like you couldn’t swerve because of oncoming traffic. I forget the exact name of the offence - something like impolite driving - but someone got done for it recently when he splashed a cop.

3

No, no, Absolute. If you were turning into Tony Soprano, you’d be here telling us about how those fuckin’ degenerate streetwalkers got what they deserved.

By feeling guilty about things, you’re turning into Carmella Soprano.

4

I once got splashed like that - soaked from the head down. On my birthday. :frowning:

5

You didn’t hit the hole on purpose, did you?

If not, enjoy! :stuck_out_tongue:

6

That was schadenfreude–taking pleasure in the misfortunes of others. (I just learned that new word recently and wanted to use it.) And evidently, it’s common enough to have a word for it.

I was wondering how someone could notice that they’re a sociopath (much less becoming one) since sociopaths don’t notice or have a conscience about causing harm.

7

Well, today, 6 months or so later, I got my comeuppance.

It was pouring rain, and I was walking on a narrow sidewalk along an enormous solid brick wall. I noticed too late that there was a deep, muddy puddle in the street, just a few feet away from me.

Next thing I know, three cars come by in rapid succession and completely drench me.

8

Think of it this way, you just improved three other drivers’ days. :smiley:

9

<Nelson Muntz> Ha ha! </NM>

Sorry, I couldn’t resist.

10

How can that be an offense? It’s not like it’s something you know you’re about to do. Water splashes people when it’s raining…that’s a simple fact, right?

11

That’s actually an offense in quite a few countries. Where I come from, if you splash someone with your car, you pay the dry-cleaning bill. Or go to jail.

Nitpick: If you’re driving a car, you’re supposed to know that you’re about to splash someone.

As for the rain, it’s just too damned difficult to sue whoever is responsible for the rain.

Anyhoo, this is known as scottish humour, a laugh on someone else’s expense.

12

Well, that’s karma for ya.

Do sociopaths have karma? I’ve always wondered about that.

13

I did that on purpose, once. To a bunch of Westboro Baptist nutballs who were protesting outside a Billy Graham revival meeting thing, because they thought he doesn’t hate gays as much as God does.

Every once in a while, I think back on the moment I decided to do that, and wonder if I shouldn’t feel bad about it in some way. Then I have another chuckle about it and move on.

14

Oh, man, karma gotcha, Absolute! :smiley:

15

A German word. That changes things a little, don’t you think?

As long as you started the nitpicking, you should know that you meant to say:

“Anywho, this is known as Scottish humour, or a laugh at someone else’s expense.”

Or, better:

“Anywho, this is known as schadenfreude, or pleasure at someone else’s expense.”

16

What, you got something against appositive phrases, fetus?

17

There’s nothing particularly wrong with them, but I prefer my clauses to have a clean conjunction break between them. YMMV, and apparently does.

18

Well I’ve learnt something new,I always thought that shadenfreude meant that if something good happens to one person then somewhere else something bad happens to someone else to counterbalance it.

19

How’s this for an excuse?
Rick’s rule of foul weather driving: It is impossible to tell the depth of a puddle from the top. A 1/4" puddle looks exactly the same as a 8" deep one from above. :smiley:

20

Of course they have karma. They drive their karma through puddles to splash people.