Fondue: Works great on meat, too.
Ow. Ow. Ow.
This is just wierd. How could it not have been premeditated?
Let’s see here. She had to…
Wait for her boyfriend to fall asleep.
Find the fondue fuel.
Pour it on his thang.
Light it - and depending on her level of evilness, either stand there laughing maniacally or run like hell.
How far in advance do you have to plan something for it to be considered premeditated?
That should be “premarinaded” not “premeditated.”
She was wanting to tenderize it.
A week in advance, and all receipts for the tools required to get the job done must be in order. :rolleyes:
The legal defense is probably that she spilled it on him while it was lit or some crap like that. Unfortunately, the answer to “What were you doing with a can of lit fondue fuel near his genitals?” doesn’t have a whole lot of legal relevance.
Isn’t that generally the opposite goal of foreplay?
It does remind me of a button I saw in a record shop back in the early 80s: “If it ain’t flaccid, it ain’t worth the fuck.” It was right next to a button that read, “If it ain’t hard, it ain’t worth the fuck.” I assumed the former was intended to embarass those who thought “flaccid” meant “hard.”
Sure. But who here was expecting her to be smart?
That’s the last time he says to her, “Liar, liar, pants on fire!”
Permarinated!..snork
“Oh, no, your honor, it was just one of those spur-of-the-moment kinda things.”
I see now theunfounddoor beat me to it. :smack:
That’s okay, we still love you.
Now drop 'em.