Once a robot, I’m now a lifeless Zombie. My soul died on the 405 freeway. This LA/Orange Cty California freeway is moderate to Heavy to Gridlocked, 24/7. Twenty-five miles on this freeway equates to 1 1/2 to 2 1/2 hellish, anguish filled hours of driving, a onetime family funfilled adventure. Everyday, your stuck in your vehicle surrounded by impatient maniacal carbon monoxide laced drones. Tractor-Trailers and assorted trucks dominate the lanes, some with Graffiti to remind you that your in Hell. RoadHazards, Potholes as deep as wheelbarrows, Living Room furniture, Aluminum Ladders, this freeway is virtually boobytrapped. I might as well be in Iraq. Drivers on Cellphones, blah,blah,blah…“shut the hell up and drive the damn car!” Nobody Signals, Tail-Gators from Satans cellar. Lawless single-drivers defiantly using the carpool lane ignoring the $271 dollar violation. Where are the Cops??? Cars with no Breaklights or Headlights, take your pick. Hummers and SUV’s the size of the Titanic with headlights brighter than a nuclear reaction drive with malicious intimidation. Illegal immigrant drivers, out-of-state drivers, cars with no License plates…I cannot escape this fucking insanity!!!
Where are the Cops??? This asphalt Demon has stolen my soul…
Not true. I once drove entered the 405 via the 101 interchange and went deep into the bowels of Los Angeles (I was heading to Long Beach) without hitting any slow spots at all. The road was just flyin’.
The trick is to only travel between 2:30 AM and 4:30 AM or so.
Hey, if you’re getting bored, come on over to Houston and drive I-10 from Katy to the 610 Loop. It’s just exactly the same as you wrote, only flatter and straighter.
I’ve been calling I-10 “Satan’s Highway” for years.
I don’t know how well Houston’s traffic stacks up to L.A.'s famed traffic, but we’re neck and neck with them for smoggiest city in the country. Our horrible traffic can’t be too far off the pace.
Most of the time I never had any trouble on the 405!
Lane-splitting is legal in California, y’see.
On a motorcycle you can split lanes, use the HOV lanes, save time, save gas, and regain your soul at the same time.
I am aware of the nightmarish 405, but Lady Fortune has been so kind as to bless me with few encounters with its busy periods. The few times I have had such an unpleasantness, I just smoked a few bowls and pumped the Marley…
'Course you weren’t driving, of course.
Would that be the same I-10 that starts in L.A.?
I heard a story once about a guy on the 405 who had to go
number two
and all he had was a MickyDee’s bag containing a half-eaten cheeseburger. :eek:
I had to drive on the 405 a few months ago and promised to never bitch about Chicago traffic again.
Oh, by the way, you lane-splitters scare the crap out of people who aren’t used to it.
Even crossing the 405 is hell. I work in Santa Monica and my daughter goes to pre-school near UCLA, which means that once or twice a week (depending on my wife’s schedule) I have to cross under the 405 on Wilshire to pick her up.
If something bad happens in the pass to the Valley, the traffic backs up onto Sunset and Wilshire, grid-locking the entire west side. One day last month it took me 70 minutes to get from Santa Monica to Bel Air … and I didn’t even get on the effing freeway!!!
It sure would. That highway runs through both L.A. and Houston, and is home to the five of the worst twelve bottlenecks in the nation according to a study published last year.
Twelve Worst Highway Interchanges in America:
- Los Angeles - Ventura Freeway US-101 at I-405 interchange; 318,000 cars; 27,144,000 hours.
- Houston - I-610 at I-10 interchange; 295,000 cars; 25,181,000 hours.
- Chicago - I-90/94 at I-290 “Circle Interchange;” 293,671 cars; 25,068,000 hours.
- Phoenix - I-10 at SR-51/202 “Mini-Stack” interchange; 280,800 cars; 22,805,000 hours.
- Los Angeles - I-405 at** I-10 **interchange; 296,000 cars; 22,792,000 hours.
- **Atlanta **- I-75 at I-85 interchange; 259,128 cars; 21,045,000 hours.
- Washington, D.C. - I-495 at I-270 interchange; 243,425 cars; 19,429,000 hours.
- **Los Angeles **- I-10 at I-5 interchange; 318,500 cars; 18,606,000 hours.
- **Los Angeles **- I-405 at I-605 interchange; 318,000 cars; 18,606,000 hours.
- **Atlanta **- I-285 at I-85 “Spaghetti Junction” interchange; 266,000 cars; 17,072,000 hours.
- Chicago - I-94 at I-90 interchange; 260,403 cars; 16,713,000 hours.
- Phoenix - I-17 at** I-10** “the Stack” interchange to Cactus Road; 208,000 cars; 16,310,000 hours.
You entered the State of California of your own fool free will.
It’s your own damn fault.
Oh God, I used to have to drive the 405…twitch twitch
Was the cheeseburger there before or after he crapped in the bag? 
Bosda....I entered The State of California from my mothers birth Canal...Me too.
Mamma Roboto’s got some slpainin’ to do. :eek:
that’s splainin’
Ah, see, the 405 only moonlights as a freeway. Its day job is as a parking lot. They should really hire some valets.