Cultural divide?
How to describe this? If I’m off work during a weekday not in holiday season, and go to do some shopping or errands during work time, when most folk in paid employment are at their desks/workstations/lathes/steering-wheels and kids/students are safely behind school walls. There is a whole 'nother type of life going on in which the words urgent, schedule and deadline do not figure and absolutely nothing has to be done now. The maximum level of urgency is some time today.
So here I am on my day off with my list of chores (tax the car, buy shoes, pay bills blahblah…) zipping between these people living in their total. . .lack. . .of. . . urgency. . . world like one of those aliens-who-move-so-fast-they’re-invisible off Star Trek. Mostly it’s mums with baby buggies and retired folk with the occasional house-husband (yes they exist my brother is one). I’m not passing judgment (well trying not to) but there’s this whole vibe of dawdling and indecisivness. Usually if I’ve got something to do it will be in a work context where one is expected to get it done in a timely manner “Oh I bumped into X and we stopped off at Pret-a-mange for lunch” doesn’t work as an excuse when you miss a release build.
What I do when I go to buy shoes: I go to a shoe shop, straight to the shoe shop, do not pause to chat/window-shop/snack, pick a pair of shoes, try on shoes, buy shoes, total transaction time 15 minutes. On to the next task… the only time I’m not getting something done is when I’m in a queue. This modus operandi does not change just because I actually have all day to get my stuff done.
Is it just me? Does anyone else see a division in society here?
well, i don’t really have the time to answer you… (sorry, but it was just such an obvious thing to say…no excuse, i know)
my husband would tell you that the reason some people don’t look busy is that the rest of us are doing their work.
i’m inclined to believe that the divide is in the attitude. some people look at a given day by what they have to get done…and hope to pack as much of it in as possible (sounds like you and me fit here)…other people look at the day and figure they’ll get as much done as they can or are comfortable with.
so that kills the question of who gets more done–since both groups look at it differently. i still remember my mother sitting down in the evening going through her mental to-do list and badgering herself if everything didn’t get done. it didn’t matter, of course, how many things she got done that weren’t on her list…
truth be told, i’ve gotten to the point where i feel worse if i get through the day and realize i haven’t spent real time with my family.
I see the division in society. I think I tend to jump from one side to the other, depending on whether today is a work day for me or a day off.
On my days off, I have all freaking day and am rarely in a hurry. I was getting into my car one fine sunny Saturday morning to head off to Home Depot for my weekly load of home improvement products, and my elderly/retired neighbors called to me from their driveway. They were just saying hello, but I ended up hanging out for about an hour, just chatting with them like I had nothing else to do. Pull that on me when I’m on my way to work and I’ll become the rudest neighbor they’ve ever met.
I’ve long believed that if you do not have a 9-5 job, there are certain hours when you should be restricted from certain types of businesses. Very little annoys me more than when I stop off at Publix for something (like lunch!) and have to wait in line behind 20 Stay-At-Home Moms, Retired Blue Haired Raisin-Faced Little Old Ladies and other people who have no business being in line at Publix from 11:30 a.m. -1:30 p.m. when the rest of us only have 30-60 minutes to get our errands run and get something to eat before we have to get back to work. This applies also to the hours of 8:00 a.m. - 9:00a.m. and 4:30 p.m. - 6:00p.m. Those are prime errand-running hours for those of us who work normal business hours. You should have to have a 9-5 work license to patronize any dining establishment, grocery store, convenience store, gas station, dry cleaning shop, shipping place like the UPS store or anywhere else I might have an errand. If you’re caught at the grocery store during 9-5 restricted hours, there should be a terrible fine to pay. Or a separate line that takes an hour to get through, for those of us not in a hurry.
If you do shift work, or are not employed for whatever reasons, you have no business being out on the streets at those times. You should be considerate of those of us who have timelines to follow on work days.
And this has exactly what to do with people who don’t have a deadline to meet?
If you do happen bump into some friends on your day off and they invite you to have a bite to eat, do you say, “Sorry, I have to spend the next 15 minutes buying shoes, and after that it’s 10 minutes for pants. Then I’m going home. Can’t waste time dawdling over lunch! Terribly inefficient! Have to run!”
I hear where you’re coming from. If someone has time to shuffle and wander, I at least hope they move to the side of the aisle. (Can you tell I just came back from grocery shopping?) Personally, not only do I have other things to do, like reading the SDMB, but I have a bad back, and the longer I’m on my feet the more it hurts.
I also have what amounts to a fetish about efficiency in certain areas. Plan ahead, traverse the stores or whatever in the least possible time. Bag the groceries while the cashier is ringing up the items. Have your checkbook or wallet ready.
OTOH, sometimes, when I’m not in pain, I have to stop myself and realize that some things are not important enough to get upset over. This occurred to me one day years ago when there were food shortages in some unfortunate country, and people stood in line for hours on the chance there might be some food available. Sometimes they didn’t even know what the line was for; if they saw a line they figured it was an opportunity to get something that was in short supply. So when I stood in my line that day, with a large cart overflowing with food, knowing I had the money to pay for it, I decided that whether the wait was 5 minutes or 10 or even 20 was not quite that big a deal.
Well it doesn’t. What I’m on about is the basic mindset. Some people walk on escalators, some don’t.
Hooray! It’s not just me.
It takes me three or four days to decompress, I can’t do the “Hey I’ve got all day to do this let’s mooch” in just a weekend, definitely not in a single day. I need to see a week or two of mooching time ahead before I’m that relaxed.
So in other words, you’re uptight because you’re a Type A Personality and you think everyone else should be? Or should at least cater to you because you are?
Who said I was uptight? And this isn’t a personality thing it’s a lifestyle thing, I just don’t understand the mindset of people who will stand still on an escalator which moves slower than walking pace*.
Some people do have all day every day - a lot of us don’t (see Dogzilla’s post).
*I’d rather take the stairs though that’s seldom an option. It occurs to me that the local Virgin store has an up escalator but no down, you actually have to haul your own body mass down a set of stairs. I wonder how many people get stranded?
Yup, I’m down with you brother (sister?). Dawdlers everywhere.
There seems to be a particular breed of middle-aged woman* who waits for all her supermarket shopping to be scanned and piled up beyond the till, and only then does she attempt to locate her money from deep within labyrinthine handbags and purses, and after the 5-minute search for cash or credit card, only then does she begin packing her goods into the bags**.
Or elderly people buying 5 different kinds of scratch cards and ten different lottery tickets with all their grandchildren’s birthdays that have to be typed in individually by the sales clerk while everyone else is queueing up behind them for their lunch. Why do you always do this at lunchtime?! Why are you buying lottery tickets? You won’t win! You should be spending your meagre pension on biscuits or Werther’s Originals, not gambling with it!
*No I’m not sexist, and yes it is only ever women I’ve seen doing this.
**We usually self-pack over here.
Whoa, there, jjimm. there’s a difference with people being inconsiderate and people who just don’t rush around constantly.
The OP seems to have some kind of aversion toward people who stroll instead of dash, who shop instead of hitting the store like some kind of a retail guerilla and then fading into the night.
I sometimes take my own sweet time about shopping on my day off, but I certainly don’t monopolize the clerk while others are waiting or park my oblivious butt in the middle of the aisle so no one can get by, and when it’s time to pay I am mindful of those in line behind me.
If you don’t have anywhere to be, you can take your time—but it’s just plain rude to take up other people’s time.
If you’re caught at the grocery store during 9-5 restricted hours, there should be a terrible fine to pay. Or a separate line that takes an hour to get through, for those of us not in a hurry.