And once your done with the never ending hole story I’m gonn tell my ass crack of despair parable!
There was this guy in the navy who dodn’t even have an ass crack. He did have nipples, tho. "Bout the size of a silver dollar. 
Peace,
mangeorge
Mangeorge said:
I bet that really upset you Navy boys, didn’t it??
Hooorah!
I was just stating an opinion 
I once read somewhere that your nipple color is meant to be the same as color as your lips.
Just turn the light off! No-one cares what colour they are in the dark.
As far as I’m concerned, nipples are nipples, and are always attached to hooters. I can readily identify with Al Bundy and the Bundy Family motto:
Hooters, hooters, yum yum yum
Hooters, hooters, on a girl that’s dumb
Now, how fast can I run away without getting something thrown at me?
This may come as a suprise to you (it did to my hubby), but the milk comes out of more than one hole. It also goes in multiple directions.
It’s more like a sprinkler system.
Any woman’s nipple is a good nipple – if it’s in your mouth.
Jebus said (to techchick68):
See, guys? You don’t have to have a personality to be successful with women.
If for no other reason than it would be redundant.
Talkinsquirrel said:
Dammit, don’t do that to me when I’m breathing!
You know, I avoided this thread for a bit, fearing it would suck, but after reading it, I find it rather titillating.
Thanks for keeping us abreast on your choice of nipples, Jebus.
And thanks for sharing those painful mammories of your ex-gf.
“abreast of choice of nipples”…oh…I’m going to have to assume you meant that, otherwise it would just be too easy…
That is 100% correct. As a side note: that stuff really hurts when it squirts you in the eye. My ex who was still breastfeeding (not my children - I have none) would start squirting whenever she had an orgasm. Ah, the painful (literally) memories.
It tastes kinda nice, though.
I’ve also encountered chapped nipples – in the winter, one should always carry chap stick or some other emollient for this very purpose. Tis’ the gentlemanly thing, you know.
I’ve never put chapstick on my nipples. I would think that would feel kind of weird during application.
I can’t believe we have women in here talking about their nipples! I love the SDMB! Jebus is a genius!
And on top of that, Jebus took one for the team, thereby warning us all. What a guy.
(Homer Simpson voice “on”)
Mmmmmmmmm… ar…e…ola <<drooling and gurgling noises>>
(Homer Simpson voice “off”)
I love large diameter areolas. Silver dollar size is especially appealing. Unfortunately, I haven’t had the pleasure of enjoying any “silver dollars,” as of yet. 
Well, mine are 3.25 inches across. What is concidered small?
May I see??
I don’t want to start another thread and get techchick get ticked off at me, but I don’t like nipples with hair around them. And I don’t like small or dark nipples either.